Mum has gone :(

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Comments

  • Appetite
    Mandy,
    My mom's diagnosis came as the result of a routine scan so she was not exhibiting any symptoms. As a result, her appetite has not suffered one bit. She watches what she eats so as to avoid the constipation issues associated with the chemo drugs. Perhaps your mums appetite issues are not only the result of the cancer but also of being a bit depressed. Her Dr's keep asking her if she has any abdominal pain, which thankfully she does not. I pray this is not what we have to look forward to. Mom's next round of chemo is Friday - she seems to tolerate it fairly well but I can already see that as it builds in your system, it wears you down. The goal of her chemo is to keep her where she is right now since she hasn't had any symptoms and again, her appetite is good. My mom has been through a lot in her life so she seems to take a cancer diagnosis as just another test that God has given her. She completely understands the severity of it and is determined to do this on her own terms. She often refers to herself as "The Unsinkable Molly Brown".

    I hope you have good family and friends to lean on and also who can help you out. How is mum tolerating her treatment?
    Let us know and be well,
    J-

    Hi Mandy
    Sorry we are meeting like this, I feel your pain and desperation , it is awful to begin with , but it will get easier and you will even have some laughs along the way!!!!
    Mum was diagnosed may 2010, she displayed no symptoms , other than her tummy was very swollen and she looked about 8 months pregnant.
    I took her straight ti her gp who did a ca125 test followed by a scan, she was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. It was advanced stage 3 high grade.
    Mum had to have 3 lots of carbo taxol ,before the would operate,it was after the operation we were told it was actually PPC, she responded well initially and the ascites stopped and her ca125 dropped tp within normal levels she had her debulking surgery and the surgeon said he had removed all visible traces of the beast.she finished off her other 3 chemos ,had a ct scan at the end of the treatment, it showed the cancer had started growing again :(
    Mum then went on to doxil , known in the uk as caeylx, her onc said with her grade of cancer it normally would only work for 3/4 cycles, however she managed to complete all 6 and it did hold it at bay.
    After this mum went onto topotecan she did about 2 cycles of this , she then went to the hospital to be told that topo wasn't working for her , this was on the Monday , I believe she picked up the pneumonia that killed her that day.Topo made her blood so bad she could not fight off the pheumonia. Mum was dead by Wednesday evening, cancer did not kill mum chemo did, but I must add if she had not had the chemo she would have been dead a lot quicker.It is the risk everyone with cancer takes, if they pick up an infection it is a whole lot more serious for them , make sure your mum religiously takes her temp everyday , my mum was naughty I and know some day she didn't do it, I don't think she had for a few days before she went , I asked her the previous thursday because she said she felt rough , and she did it while I was on the phone, but knowing mum she didn't do it again , so please make sure she does it everyday, even if she feels fine and dandy!
    Tell your mum to keep fighting , it is over whelming to start with. There are so many wonderful drugs to combat any bad side effete your mum may or may not experience.
    When mum did her first lot of chemo, apart from loosing her hair she sailed through it. She suffered with doxil to start with , but we got her sorted with the right drugs and she sailed through it again.
    It is a he'll of journey you and your mum are now about to embark on.please also remember don't look look at statistics , their is only one statistic that matters to you and that is your mum, and that statistic is 100%
    feel free to ask me more if I haven't explained myself very well.
  • Hi Mandy
    Sorry we are meeting like this, I feel your pain and desperation , it is awful to begin with , but it will get easier and you will even have some laughs along the way!!!!
    Mum was diagnosed may 2010, she displayed no symptoms , other than her tummy was very swollen and she looked about 8 months pregnant.
    I took her straight ti her gp who did a ca125 test followed by a scan, she was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. It was advanced stage 3 high grade.
    Mum had to have 3 lots of carbo taxol ,before the would operate,it was after the operation we were told it was actually PPC, she responded well initially and the ascites stopped and her ca125 dropped tp within normal levels she had her debulking surgery and the surgeon said he had removed all visible traces of the beast.she finished off her other 3 chemos ,had a ct scan at the end of the treatment, it showed the cancer had started growing again :(
    Mum then went on to doxil , known in the uk as caeylx, her onc said with her grade of cancer it normally would only work for 3/4 cycles, however she managed to complete all 6 and it did hold it at bay.
    After this mum went onto topotecan she did about 2 cycles of this , she then went to the hospital to be told that topo wasn't working for her , this was on the Monday , I believe she picked up the pneumonia that killed her that day.Topo made her blood so bad she could not fight off the pheumonia. Mum was dead by Wednesday evening, cancer did not kill mum chemo did, but I must add if she had not had the chemo she would have been dead a lot quicker.It is the risk everyone with cancer takes, if they pick up an infection it is a whole lot more serious for them , make sure your mum religiously takes her temp everyday , my mum was naughty I and know some day she didn't do it, I don't think she had for a few days before she went , I asked her the previous thursday because she said she felt rough , and she did it while I was on the phone, but knowing mum she didn't do it again , so please make sure she does it everyday, even if she feels fine and dandy!
    Tell your mum to keep fighting , it is over whelming to start with. There are so many wonderful drugs to combat any bad side effete your mum may or may not experience.
    When mum did her first lot of chemo, apart from loosing her hair she sailed through it. She suffered with doxil to start with , but we got her sorted with the right drugs and she sailed through it again.
    It is a he'll of journey you and your mum are now about to embark on.please also remember don't look look at statistics , their is only one statistic that matters to you and that is your mum, and that statistic is 100%
    feel free to ask me more if I haven't explained myself very well.

    Please excuse my spelling I
    Please excuse my spelling I am on the iPad and it is a nightmare to type on!
  • irish mandy
    irish mandy Member Posts: 6

    Please excuse my spelling I
    Please excuse my spelling I am on the iPad and it is a nightmare to type on!

    THANKS FOR YOUR HELP AND ENCOURAGEMENT
    Dear Liz,

    Thank you for your words of encourgement, it means so much. Mum is very bad today with severe back pain, i wonder is that a symptom of peritoneal cancer? All we can do is accept it now, and journey with her.

    Once again, thank you, and all the best to you at this very difficult time in your life. I wonder also who I would run to if I didn't have mum around, they know us like no one ever will.
    Take care and God bless, Mandy.
  • irish mandy
    irish mandy Member Posts: 6

    Appetite
    Mandy,
    My mom's diagnosis came as the result of a routine scan so she was not exhibiting any symptoms. As a result, her appetite has not suffered one bit. She watches what she eats so as to avoid the constipation issues associated with the chemo drugs. Perhaps your mums appetite issues are not only the result of the cancer but also of being a bit depressed. Her Dr's keep asking her if she has any abdominal pain, which thankfully she does not. I pray this is not what we have to look forward to. Mom's next round of chemo is Friday - she seems to tolerate it fairly well but I can already see that as it builds in your system, it wears you down. The goal of her chemo is to keep her where she is right now since she hasn't had any symptoms and again, her appetite is good. My mom has been through a lot in her life so she seems to take a cancer diagnosis as just another test that God has given her. She completely understands the severity of it and is determined to do this on her own terms. She often refers to herself as "The Unsinkable Molly Brown".

    I hope you have good family and friends to lean on and also who can help you out. How is mum tolerating her treatment?
    Let us know and be well,
    J-

    Mum not feeling too good
    Hi J,
    thanks again for replying to me. Mum is on her sixth day post her first Chemo and still not feeling good. No appetite, exhausted and very bad back pain. I think all of these symptoms are more to do with Peritoneal Cancer than anything else though, but im not too sure. Im glad your mum was caught in time and please God it stays that way. My mum had Breast Cancer in 1997 also and fought a brilliant battle and I thank God every day that we still have her after it, even though the fourteen years since then only feels like fourteen months! We have alot to thank God for and we will journey this horrible road with my mum and will help her at every turn.
    I am glad of this site and for people like you, who offer kind words at a scary time.
    God bless you and I will pray for your mums health also.

    Mandy.
  • Tina Brown
    Tina Brown Member Posts: 1,036 Member
    So sorry
    Hiya I am so saddened to read your post. I have been away for a few months so I did not know about your sadness until now. I understand how you are feeling as I lost my mum to cancer 3 1/2 years ago.

    I have always believed she is with me as I live my life and often talk to her when I am sad, frustrated, happy or confused. It is usually in my car and I pretend she is sitting in the passenger seat. It gives me a lot of comfort now.

    Take care Tina xx
  • irish mandy
    irish mandy Member Posts: 6

    So sorry
    Hiya I am so saddened to read your post. I have been away for a few months so I did not know about your sadness until now. I understand how you are feeling as I lost my mum to cancer 3 1/2 years ago.

    I have always believed she is with me as I live my life and often talk to her when I am sad, frustrated, happy or confused. It is usually in my car and I pretend she is sitting in the passenger seat. It gives me a lot of comfort now.

    Take care Tina xx

    shared love of our mums
    Dear tina,
    Thank u for ur post. I'm sorry u lost ur mum. Was it peritoneal cancer? What a crappy disease. I know nothing about it only it is wearing my mum down very fast. I would appreciate any tips on how to help her x
    Mandy
  • Tina Brown
    Tina Brown Member Posts: 1,036 Member

    shared love of our mums
    Dear tina,
    Thank u for ur post. I'm sorry u lost ur mum. Was it peritoneal cancer? What a crappy disease. I know nothing about it only it is wearing my mum down very fast. I would appreciate any tips on how to help her x
    Mandy

    Hello Mandy
    It was nice of you to reply. Sadly I lost my mum to Bowel cancer with mets to the liver. It is me who has PPC. I was diagnosed a year after my mum died and my poorm Dad was so so upset.

    Tips to help your mum; well from my own point of view I talk about my cancer so maybe your Mum would like to have a factual and frank discussion about what is happening to her. When my mum was on chemo and still relatively well I used to pick her up and we would go to the garden centre or shopping centre and have a lovely time browsing and shopping at her leisure. We would go for lunch and spend ages just talking. I would link arms and walk at her pace around the shops. My daughter and I do that now.

    Just spend loads of time with your mum and talk, cuddle and laugh together. That is what I used to do with my mum and what I now do with my daughter.

    Take care Tina xxxxxxxxxxxx
  • irish mandy
    irish mandy Member Posts: 6

    Hello Mandy
    It was nice of you to reply. Sadly I lost my mum to Bowel cancer with mets to the liver. It is me who has PPC. I was diagnosed a year after my mum died and my poorm Dad was so so upset.

    Tips to help your mum; well from my own point of view I talk about my cancer so maybe your Mum would like to have a factual and frank discussion about what is happening to her. When my mum was on chemo and still relatively well I used to pick her up and we would go to the garden centre or shopping centre and have a lovely time browsing and shopping at her leisure. We would go for lunch and spend ages just talking. I would link arms and walk at her pace around the shops. My daughter and I do that now.

    Just spend loads of time with your mum and talk, cuddle and laugh together. That is what I used to do with my mum and what I now do with my daughter.

    Take care Tina xxxxxxxxxxxx

    great advice!
    Thank you tina. It's those kind of memories of life with ur mum that I hope to have. I'm so sorry you are fighting this disease, i hope you fight for many years to come. X
    God bless you x