Last Chemo!

I haven't been around in awhile but I just wanted to share that I finished my last treatment yesterday! I am in remission and have an appointment in 2 weeks to figure out where to go from here. Its weird, I feel like I should be happy and excited but I am not really. If anything I'm more terrified of what is going to happen next. Since my cancer is so rare, no one really knows my chances of recurrence or anything. Also, I'm still not feeling very well and I think that may be interfering with my ability to celebrate such a milestone. Its hard to believe I am done when I still feel like crap. Well, I guess I just wanted to update and vent a little. Hope everyone is doing well!

Comments

  • vinny59
    vinny59 Member Posts: 1,036 Member
    concrats!
    Hey, they are normal feelings, I have been in remission for over a year now, and I still worry! what keeps it in check is that I'm not in treatment anymore! Stay well Vinny
  • allmost60
    allmost60 Member Posts: 3,178 Member
    normal...
    I am still doing my 2 year maintenance treatment in the form of a Rituxan infusion every other month. I'm into my second year of maint with 7 more infusions to go. This may sound crazy, but I've often thought what it will feel like when I finish the Rituxan and then do nothing, because it worries me that by doing nothing, it may start the cancer growing again. I've talked to my doctor about my concerns and he said my feelings are perfectly normal. He said with blood work every other month and a yearly CT scan, we will be able to monitor my cancer and stay on top of it. I get what you are feeling, and I think all of us feel the same way. We just have to try to live in the day and enjoy each moment, otherwise we will waste precious time worrying about things we have no control over. Since you just finished treatment, you may need some time for your body to adjust to no chemicals being pumped in it. Might explain the crappy feeling until the chemo exits your body, which is a slow process. Keep in touch and let us know what your doctor plans to do from here. Vent anytime...holding our fears in causes extra stress. Take care and remember we are here for you.
    Best wishes...Sue
    (Follicular NHL-stage3-grade2-typeA-diagnosed June 2010) age 61.
  • anliperez915
    anliperez915 Member Posts: 770
    Hi Ana
    Hi Ana,
    Just wanted to give you a high five for beating the big C! You mentioned that you don't feel well, like Sue said I think it's gonna take some time for all the chemicals to get out of your system, give it some time. Hang in their sweetie! Don't over do it and take it one day at a time. Sending you a Big hug via internet.

    Sincerely,
    Liz
  • anag21
    anag21 Member Posts: 28

    Hi Ana
    Hi Ana,
    Just wanted to give you a high five for beating the big C! You mentioned that you don't feel well, like Sue said I think it's gonna take some time for all the chemicals to get out of your system, give it some time. Hang in their sweetie! Don't over do it and take it one day at a time. Sending you a Big hug via internet.

    Sincerely,
    Liz

    Thanks for the responses
    Thanks for the responses everyone, I really appreciate it. I guess you are all right that I need to have patience but its very hard because I just started school again. I guess I was expecting to be able to jump back in no problems but its been really hard. I get extremely tired walking across campus and I've been having pretty bad nausea and vomiting. Hopefully this will all pass over soon and I can go back to living my life and enjoying school like I used to!
  • miss maggie
    miss maggie Member Posts: 929
    allmost60 said:

    normal...
    I am still doing my 2 year maintenance treatment in the form of a Rituxan infusion every other month. I'm into my second year of maint with 7 more infusions to go. This may sound crazy, but I've often thought what it will feel like when I finish the Rituxan and then do nothing, because it worries me that by doing nothing, it may start the cancer growing again. I've talked to my doctor about my concerns and he said my feelings are perfectly normal. He said with blood work every other month and a yearly CT scan, we will be able to monitor my cancer and stay on top of it. I get what you are feeling, and I think all of us feel the same way. We just have to try to live in the day and enjoy each moment, otherwise we will waste precious time worrying about things we have no control over. Since you just finished treatment, you may need some time for your body to adjust to no chemicals being pumped in it. Might explain the crappy feeling until the chemo exits your body, which is a slow process. Keep in touch and let us know what your doctor plans to do from here. Vent anytime...holding our fears in causes extra stress. Take care and remember we are here for you.
    Best wishes...Sue
    (Follicular NHL-stage3-grade2-typeA-diagnosed June 2010) age 61.

    The end of Rituxan Treatment
    Dear Sue,

    My DX is not Follicular NHL. To update you: I was DX in Sept 2009 with marginal B Cell Lymphoma, stage 1, low grade B Cell NHL of the small bowel. I had treatment only once in Dec 2009 of Rituxan, once weekly for 4 weeks. After the Rituxan treatment I went to see my
    oncologist every 3 months, then every 6 months for blood tests. Also, my last Pet Scan was
    in Dec 2010. I am scheduled to see my oncologist this Feb 6.

    I want to share my feelings with you with watch and wait. It didn't bother me one bit not
    having any further treatment. I had no reaction from the Rituxan, and have been feeling
    good. I understand you have had more treatment than I. Hopefully when the Rituxan wears
    off, you will feel well again. I do worry now about seeing my oncologist next month. What further tests will she order? Pet Scan, will it show anything to be concerned about???

    I have been diligent getting all the common tests all of us should have. Especially for me,
    colonoscopy.

    I want to share your journey after treatment and beyond. I am there for you. Hopefully,
    everything will be good for you and I. And to all my family on this site.

    Love you so. Maggie
  • allmost60
    allmost60 Member Posts: 3,178 Member

    The end of Rituxan Treatment
    Dear Sue,

    My DX is not Follicular NHL. To update you: I was DX in Sept 2009 with marginal B Cell Lymphoma, stage 1, low grade B Cell NHL of the small bowel. I had treatment only once in Dec 2009 of Rituxan, once weekly for 4 weeks. After the Rituxan treatment I went to see my
    oncologist every 3 months, then every 6 months for blood tests. Also, my last Pet Scan was
    in Dec 2010. I am scheduled to see my oncologist this Feb 6.

    I want to share my feelings with you with watch and wait. It didn't bother me one bit not
    having any further treatment. I had no reaction from the Rituxan, and have been feeling
    good. I understand you have had more treatment than I. Hopefully when the Rituxan wears
    off, you will feel well again. I do worry now about seeing my oncologist next month. What further tests will she order? Pet Scan, will it show anything to be concerned about???

    I have been diligent getting all the common tests all of us should have. Especially for me,
    colonoscopy.

    I want to share your journey after treatment and beyond. I am there for you. Hopefully,
    everything will be good for you and I. And to all my family on this site.

    Love you so. Maggie

    Maggie...
    Hi sweet Maggie,
    I'm sure your right, and I'm keeping positive thoughts that once my Rituxan is finished I will have more energy and feel closer to my old 100%. I count my blessings every day and try to stay as positive as possible, because on the grand scheme of things, it could be a lot worse. You are a very special sweet lady Maggie and I look forward to many many more years of sharing with you, and my other dear friends here in the group. Keeping positive thoughts for you to have a clean PET scan in February. Much love...Sue
    (FNHL-2-3A-6/10)
  • anag21
    anag21 Member Posts: 28
    Turns out I wasn't feeling
    Turns out I wasn't feeling well from a 14cm fluid filled cyst on my liver. They drained two liters of fluid from it and I've been in the hospital nearly 2 weeks. They don't know when I can leave because I vomit everytime they try to take me off the artificial nutrition so I had to drop out of school for another semester and I am really bummed :(
  • vinny59
    vinny59 Member Posts: 1,036 Member
    anag21 said:

    Turns out I wasn't feeling
    Turns out I wasn't feeling well from a 14cm fluid filled cyst on my liver. They drained two liters of fluid from it and I've been in the hospital nearly 2 weeks. They don't know when I can leave because I vomit everytime they try to take me off the artificial nutrition so I had to drop out of school for another semester and I am really bummed :(

    sucks
    Hang in there, get better first, school will always be there.... Vinny
  • allmost60
    allmost60 Member Posts: 3,178 Member
    anag21 said:

    Turns out I wasn't feeling
    Turns out I wasn't feeling well from a 14cm fluid filled cyst on my liver. They drained two liters of fluid from it and I've been in the hospital nearly 2 weeks. They don't know when I can leave because I vomit everytime they try to take me off the artificial nutrition so I had to drop out of school for another semester and I am really bummed :(

    Bummed..
    I'm so sorry you've been in the hospital for two weeks! As Vinny said.."sucks"! Hopefully draining the fluid from your liver will get things back on track and you will start feeling better. Rest and let your body heal and then think about returning to school. Getting your body healthy is more important than anything right now. I'll keep good positive thoughts for you. Be sure to check in and let us know how things are going for you. Much love...Sue
    (FNHL-2-3A-6/10)
  • anliperez915
    anliperez915 Member Posts: 770
    anag21 said:

    Turns out I wasn't feeling
    Turns out I wasn't feeling well from a 14cm fluid filled cyst on my liver. They drained two liters of fluid from it and I've been in the hospital nearly 2 weeks. They don't know when I can leave because I vomit everytime they try to take me off the artificial nutrition so I had to drop out of school for another semester and I am really bummed :(

    Sorry to hear Ana
    So sorry to hear that your in the hospital Ana. Sometimes we know when something is wrong but we try to stay positive. I hope you get better soon and that your not in a lot of pain! About school I know how you feel I finished my career in Oct. 2010 and was in the process of looking for work just to find out last year in Aug. that I had cancer (I did get a chance to work in the tax season). I'm also bummed out about that it just plain sucks!!! I'm worried that by the time I get better I won't remember anything I learned in school. I'll probably have to go back and do more classes lol. But like everyone else said here, you need to get better first and then worry about school. Take care of yourself and sending you a huge hug.

    Sincerely,
    Liz
  • anliperez915
    anliperez915 Member Posts: 770

    The end of Rituxan Treatment
    Dear Sue,

    My DX is not Follicular NHL. To update you: I was DX in Sept 2009 with marginal B Cell Lymphoma, stage 1, low grade B Cell NHL of the small bowel. I had treatment only once in Dec 2009 of Rituxan, once weekly for 4 weeks. After the Rituxan treatment I went to see my
    oncologist every 3 months, then every 6 months for blood tests. Also, my last Pet Scan was
    in Dec 2010. I am scheduled to see my oncologist this Feb 6.

    I want to share my feelings with you with watch and wait. It didn't bother me one bit not
    having any further treatment. I had no reaction from the Rituxan, and have been feeling
    good. I understand you have had more treatment than I. Hopefully when the Rituxan wears
    off, you will feel well again. I do worry now about seeing my oncologist next month. What further tests will she order? Pet Scan, will it show anything to be concerned about???

    I have been diligent getting all the common tests all of us should have. Especially for me,
    colonoscopy.

    I want to share your journey after treatment and beyond. I am there for you. Hopefully,
    everything will be good for you and I. And to all my family on this site.

    Love you so. Maggie

    Hi Miss Maggie
    Just thinking of you! Hope your Dr. visit went good. Let us know and take care. (((Hugs)))

    Sincerely,
    Liz
  • onlytoday
    onlytoday Member Posts: 609 Member
    anag21 said:

    Turns out I wasn't feeling
    Turns out I wasn't feeling well from a 14cm fluid filled cyst on my liver. They drained two liters of fluid from it and I've been in the hospital nearly 2 weeks. They don't know when I can leave because I vomit everytime they try to take me off the artificial nutrition so I had to drop out of school for another semester and I am really bummed :(

    So sorry
    Sorry to hear about this latest complication and that you've been in the hospital! Hope you get stronger every day.
    Wishing you well,
    Donna
  • onlytoday
    onlytoday Member Posts: 609 Member

    The end of Rituxan Treatment
    Dear Sue,

    My DX is not Follicular NHL. To update you: I was DX in Sept 2009 with marginal B Cell Lymphoma, stage 1, low grade B Cell NHL of the small bowel. I had treatment only once in Dec 2009 of Rituxan, once weekly for 4 weeks. After the Rituxan treatment I went to see my
    oncologist every 3 months, then every 6 months for blood tests. Also, my last Pet Scan was
    in Dec 2010. I am scheduled to see my oncologist this Feb 6.

    I want to share my feelings with you with watch and wait. It didn't bother me one bit not
    having any further treatment. I had no reaction from the Rituxan, and have been feeling
    good. I understand you have had more treatment than I. Hopefully when the Rituxan wears
    off, you will feel well again. I do worry now about seeing my oncologist next month. What further tests will she order? Pet Scan, will it show anything to be concerned about???

    I have been diligent getting all the common tests all of us should have. Especially for me,
    colonoscopy.

    I want to share your journey after treatment and beyond. I am there for you. Hopefully,
    everything will be good for you and I. And to all my family on this site.

    Love you so. Maggie

    Your oncologist appt
    Maggie,

    How was your doctor appointment today? Hope it went well, been thinking about you and praying for a good visit.

    Love,
    Donna
  • onlytoday
    onlytoday Member Posts: 609 Member

    The end of Rituxan Treatment
    Dear Sue,

    My DX is not Follicular NHL. To update you: I was DX in Sept 2009 with marginal B Cell Lymphoma, stage 1, low grade B Cell NHL of the small bowel. I had treatment only once in Dec 2009 of Rituxan, once weekly for 4 weeks. After the Rituxan treatment I went to see my
    oncologist every 3 months, then every 6 months for blood tests. Also, my last Pet Scan was
    in Dec 2010. I am scheduled to see my oncologist this Feb 6.

    I want to share my feelings with you with watch and wait. It didn't bother me one bit not
    having any further treatment. I had no reaction from the Rituxan, and have been feeling
    good. I understand you have had more treatment than I. Hopefully when the Rituxan wears
    off, you will feel well again. I do worry now about seeing my oncologist next month. What further tests will she order? Pet Scan, will it show anything to be concerned about???

    I have been diligent getting all the common tests all of us should have. Especially for me,
    colonoscopy.

    I want to share your journey after treatment and beyond. I am there for you. Hopefully,
    everything will be good for you and I. And to all my family on this site.

    Love you so. Maggie

    Miss Maggie
    How was your doctor appointment today? Thinking about you.

    Love you,
    Donna
  • allmost60
    allmost60 Member Posts: 3,178 Member
    onlytoday said:

    Miss Maggie
    How was your doctor appointment today? Thinking about you.

    Love you,
    Donna

    Me too!
    Hi Maggie,
    You've got my positive thoughts and prayers that everything is great after your Dr's appointment. Much love...Sue (FNHL-2-3a-6/10)