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Tinatheloop's picture


   It comes out of nowhere.  One minute Im cruising...looking at the advantages of this new found single life.....


....then....I open his underwear drawer and break down into tears.


 I have heard this is the rough period...a few weeks after the death....when everyone is getting on with their life, the thank you notes for cards are sent....only thing left is to face  a pile of mail, and try to figure out how to obtain a death certificate i.


Hospice helped me with that problem, they are so wonderful.


NewHere's picture

Summary Since The Beginning

I should have been adding to blog as I went along.  But this give the whole lowdown from the start almost four years ago.How and when did you learn about your cancer?A check-up in December, 2014 showed "something" that should be checked out, more as a matter of caution (and what I thought was probably too much "over medicine" :) ) right before the holidays. Scan was set for January, 2015. Came back as looking like cancer. Biopsy confirmed, and had resection February, 2015. Chemo coming in the next few weeks (March or April, 2015). Chemo started March, 2015.

Topaz_77's picture

Here We Go!

It has been an interesting week or so. I finally found out the results of all of my tests and I now know I have metastatic breast cancer. The Radiology Oncologist‘s exact words were “It’s worse than we thought.” I wanted to say, “Skip the dramatics, doc, and just give it to me straight!” I like to point out the blessings in every negative situation if I can.

RobLee's picture

Chapter twelve... Surgery number fourteen

It is now the day of surgery. Naturally I am scared, even though I have been through many surgeries before. All I can do now is hope that the surgeon is able to remove the tumor and that it is benign. As another October draws to a close, I can't help but think of all we have been thru in the past two years. Two years ago this week my wife and I were living in a motel, as we had just emptied our home of 33 years and were awaiting closing on the sale. Within six weeks she would be hospitalized and begin treatment for lymphoma.

WarriorS1's picture


This is my favorite time of the year. I probably mentioned this before. I am going to try my hand this week at making roasted red pepper soup and acorn squash soup. Two of my favorites.  My wife does not care for either but they just scream fall to me and I love the taste.

Tinatheloop's picture

Widow : 101

    You know when you have a nightmare.....and wake up.....think...." Thank God, it was just a bad dream"....wipe the sweat off your neck.....and go back to sleep?


    Same thing happens to me, but then I think...." oh, no....it is real."

Deal with it.


   It isnt too bad....I did have time through the months for melt downs...time to prepare...time to develop a plan.


  Sometimes I feel guilty, because there are advantages.  I make my own decisions.  I eat when I want....go to bed when I want.....


Drtabby's picture

Metabolically mass and pet scan.

I really don’t know what goes into a blog. Never done one. Anyway I guess it’s like an open diary. Well I have been a caregiver to my mom since 2016. My younger brother has schizophrenia and she use to care for him until a Parkinson’s diagnosis and the meds she was on caused her to hallucinate and wasn’t helping. So APS was called many timeS. I have been disabled since a fall I had in 2007.

Hiding colostomy under clothing

Does the bag fit under a belt.  I wear a uniform to work and am required to tuck in muy shirt and wear a belt.  I will be receiving a colostomy later this year after 10 years of post colorectal surgery excitement.  Actually looking forward to not being chained to the bathroom.



skidog's picture

3 Month PET = NED!!!

Hello, Just thought I would send an update on my cancer journey. diagnosed in March with HPV+ HNC, right tonsil and right lymph node. Treatment was 6 weeks daily proton beam radiation at Mayo clinic. Initially insurance denied out of network proton beam rads therapy stating it was "experimental". After a written letter from my doctor at  Mayo and a 20 minute confeence call meeting with the 9 member board from my Insurance company (Quartz) they reversed their original denial and agreed to pay "level 1 in network" costs for proton beam therepy.

Topaz_77's picture


So today I finished the last of my tests and Wednesday I find out the status of my cancer. *Dun dun dun* I am praying that it has chosen to stay put and not take a tour of my body. In any event, I officially started my oral chemo this evening so the fight has now officially begun! It’s been three hours since I’ve taken it and so far no symptoms as far as I can tell but it’s only the first dose so we shall see I suppose. I’m already emotionally detaching from my hair just in case this medicine also causes hair loss. It’s apparently pretty common along with nausea and vomiting. 


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