Cancer Survivors Network

This week has been insane. First last Thursday the nurse saw my husband and told me she is concerned that the tumor on his neck was ready to break though the skin and also that the tumor in his mouth is getting larger each time she sees him and she’s concerned it will rupture and we won’t be able to stop the bleeding so she suggested the hospice doctor come by to see him.

On Monday evening the hospice doctor came by – now mind you he did NOT know my husband's medical history at this point regarding the major surgeries he already had. I went over everything with him from January forward to catch him up. So now he looks at the tumor and tells us he is concerned that this thing can rupture and if it starts bleeding while he is sleeping he can choke on his own blood (pleasant visual doc). So he asks him how he would feel about having surgery to debulk the tumor and cauterize it. He even goes as far as telling him that this can slow down the growth of the tumor and maybe buy him some time. Of course my husband is thrilled with this news and I am fuming because this was what I has specifically asked the surgeon if they can do and was told it is not an option – so where does this guy who is not a surgeon nor a cancer doctor feel the right to make false promises? We leave it with he was going to call my husband's surgeon and I was to call him the next day.

My husband with colorectal cancer going through chemo has Chemo Brain. I am near tears trying to communicate with him. He snaps at me, thinks he told me something, doesn't remember things I say. I have had to come up with new communications skills and I can't always remember to do them which frustrates me and ultimately him. Has anyone gone through this with the person you are caring for and living with? How have you handled it? I read about it on the American Cancer Society web site and they gave some suggestions to deal with it. It is an actual sypmtom, of chemo therapy.

Mom had a pet scan two weeks ago. Results were that her left chest was lite (Stage 4 Breast on the left side) and a verterbra in her neck. The oncologist said "We're really really going to hope it's arthritis." Oncologist has told us all along she has a very agressive cancer.

Many complications later, port went in, chemo done, side effects awfull, she fell, port infected, taken to ER, port came out, blood infection, bladder infection, blood clot in leg.

She is now having back pain and the medical doctor said they are "watching" her breast bone as it is thickening (whatever that means).

My daughter seems to be very angry. I find it very hard to deal with. She lives with her father up North and I travel there to see her. The environment that she is in is in my opinion not a good one. She has chosen to live with her father. I have told her that I would love for her to live with me. The area in which she lives is isolated. Her father smokes and drinks. She has lung, bone and liver cancer. I don't know how to relate to her and would like some ideas on what do I say and do or not do. It seems that no matter what I say that it is not right. She is going to be 40 years old in December.

Well it has bee 2 weeks since jack passing, It is not getting any easier I cant believe I am taking a job that starts tomorrow as a caretake for someone else, It is so hard Im just having a hard time to do anything, but look at pictures of jack, and go to different sites Im going to try to keep on this site and maybe I can help someone

My husband has end stage laryngeal cancer. He had trach tube put in Sept. to help with breathing. Lymph nodes in neck and collarbone growing. Trach tube changed last week by Dr. There was some bleeding. Dr. said everything looked good. What does that mean? He never commented on the lymph nodes. I don't have much faith in this Dr. Today 11/18 husband is having difficulty breathing through trach tube. Says it feels restricted. There is also blood under trach and he said his shoulder is hurting. I know the cancer is spreading. I hate so see him suffer, I just don't know what I need to do. Anyone go through is? Help.

anyone out there who has walk this road ?

more than ten years ago i was my brothers caregiver back in 93 when it was new, at least new to me. he died from colon cancer (lynch syndrome) at age 33.he was father of 2 young boys. i had to fill in often.
5yrs ago i was dianosed late stage 3 and survived.

my mom had same illness and died 2 weeks ago.i was her primary caregiver too. caregiving is total surrender to the person who needs it. its draining it exhausting work of total dedication. the grief is crippling me. i know im not the only one out there to do this, am i?

i find support from the greek playwrite,

Well I had to pick up Jack ashes it seems to be finalzed that Jack is really gone, and but I still wait for him to come home and I was a little upset with a comment that Jacks brother said to his sister, he said I know we promised Jack that we would help Patty but we have to think about the family, Most all you were married a long and had a time with your love one well I was with Jack a month and I was told your man is going to die, but I stayed I loved him that much, his brother did not lift a finger to help with Jack at all, I was there ,every appointment, every step I lost everything when I made th decision to stay with Jack Now Im freaking out trying to get a job and Im just alone and i am having such a hard time that jack is still with me and he is helping me, becasue I lost everything else

I'm 27 yrs old and caring for my mother who has cancer of the tongue. She just recently had her third surgery and will start radiation in 5-6 weeks. My dad and grandparents and I are working together- taking shifts at the hospital with mom. In addition to that, running errands for everyone, and trying to keep on top of my grad school work and own household, I'm helping with my little brother who is 13 and really acting out (lying, grades dropping, behavior issues at school, etc).

After leaving the hospital yesterday, certain details of my mom's condition have been burned in my mind- the smell, the pain on her face, the blood on her gown, on her face, her swollen neck and tongue.. I just broke down last night and it's all I can do to hold myself together today at work.

Im trying I just seem to be losing everything, when Jack got sick I had to give up my apartment, now I am stuck in a situation and no way out, I made the promise to Jack to take care of his dad, but his dad is feaking me out, and his daughter says she tried of dealing with his behavior, He is making inapproiate remarks and I try to talk to him, but he is 85 , Now I am here no place to go because I gave my apartment up and I am waiting for them to rehire me And I promise Jack I would take care of his dad, but why is it all falling on me , I feel like I cant even mourn my man and I have failed