In about 2 Weeks, I see the Oncologist. I am lousy at knowing what questions to ask

What questions did you wish you ask?

What questions did you ask? I don't care if they turned out to be dumb questions. I just don't want to stand there like a deer in the headlights (by the way, drive carefully, everyone. It's that timed yeah)

Chemo is, I understand, a foregone conclusion. It will cause my immune system to be temporarily useless. I can't do all the housework myself, especially right now. Once I start chemo, I doubt I will even have the energy to set any kind of an example. (She has trouble thinking like a nurse sometimes and retreats to some game she plays on her phone).

Would it be enough to give my immune system a break for a day after treatment by checking into a hotel and building up points to use once I achieve remission?

Comments

  • Sue_2015
    Sue_2015 Member Posts: 19
    What questions to ask? good question!

    The first Oncologist that I saw had a very heavy Russian accent and it was hard to understand her.  She seemed very evasive and didn't want to or couldn't answer my questions correctly.  She was grasping for English words.  She had the results of CT and MRI and biopsy reports of the large tumor in my liver.  (The tests didn't mention much about the tumor in my ascending colon, and it was the least of anyone's concerns, apparently.)  She basically told me that my tumor was taking up over 1/3 the space in my liver and they must treat it with chemotherapy.  She said they'd put a port in my chest and I'd receive chemo every week for about 6 months and then they'd do more scans to see IF there's any shrinkage.  That after a while when there's enough shrinkage perhaps the liver tumor could be resected.

    I said "What's a port?"  (I had no previous knowledge of any terminology used in cancer treatment.)  She just patted her chest (near her heart) and said that a surgeon would put a port in my chest into which they could give me the chemo drugs.  When I asked for more details she just said not to worry it will be fine.....WTH?  When I asked what kind of chemo drugs, she just said that it would be the kind for my type of cancer, and not to worry. okay?  (She kept saying "Okay?" a lot as if it was a dismissive.)  I didn't get any literature to read or pamplets, no material to enlighten me.  I left and never went back.  I sought a 2nd opinion elsewhere. 

    Have someone with you for a 2nd "set of ears" because you might not be able to remember everything and take a notebook and write everything down.  Depending on where you are going, (like with my 2nd opinion) they'll have LOTS of reading material for you to take home.  They will tell you EXACTLY which chemo drugs (with paperwork and descriptions, possible side effects of the drugs, etc.)  As your Oncologist is talking to you, interrupt whenever a question comes to mind.  Don't leave the office until you're comfortable with their plan.  Ask how many weeks or months of chemo, and at what intervals. (Once every 2 weeks, once a week, or what?)  Ask exactly when will be the next CT, MRI or PET scan.  Mine gave me anti-nausea and anti-diarrhea as well as stool softener Rx's  to have on hand "just in case."  At one point I had to call for help because of severe mouth sores and burning and they immediately called in an Rx for a "magic mouthwash" which helped a lot. 

    Good luck and best wishes,

    Sue

     

     

  • Trubrit
    Trubrit Member Posts: 5,796 Member
    Sue_2015 said:

    What questions to ask? good question!

    The first Oncologist that I saw had a very heavy Russian accent and it was hard to understand her.  She seemed very evasive and didn't want to or couldn't answer my questions correctly.  She was grasping for English words.  She had the results of CT and MRI and biopsy reports of the large tumor in my liver.  (The tests didn't mention much about the tumor in my ascending colon, and it was the least of anyone's concerns, apparently.)  She basically told me that my tumor was taking up over 1/3 the space in my liver and they must treat it with chemotherapy.  She said they'd put a port in my chest and I'd receive chemo every week for about 6 months and then they'd do more scans to see IF there's any shrinkage.  That after a while when there's enough shrinkage perhaps the liver tumor could be resected.

    I said "What's a port?"  (I had no previous knowledge of any terminology used in cancer treatment.)  She just patted her chest (near her heart) and said that a surgeon would put a port in my chest into which they could give me the chemo drugs.  When I asked for more details she just said not to worry it will be fine.....WTH?  When I asked what kind of chemo drugs, she just said that it would be the kind for my type of cancer, and not to worry. okay?  (She kept saying "Okay?" a lot as if it was a dismissive.)  I didn't get any literature to read or pamplets, no material to enlighten me.  I left and never went back.  I sought a 2nd opinion elsewhere. 

    Have someone with you for a 2nd "set of ears" because you might not be able to remember everything and take a notebook and write everything down.  Depending on where you are going, (like with my 2nd opinion) they'll have LOTS of reading material for you to take home.  They will tell you EXACTLY which chemo drugs (with paperwork and descriptions, possible side effects of the drugs, etc.)  As your Oncologist is talking to you, interrupt whenever a question comes to mind.  Don't leave the office until you're comfortable with their plan.  Ask how many weeks or months of chemo, and at what intervals. (Once every 2 weeks, once a week, or what?)  Ask exactly when will be the next CT, MRI or PET scan.  Mine gave me anti-nausea and anti-diarrhea as well as stool softener Rx's  to have on hand "just in case."  At one point I had to call for help because of severe mouth sores and burning and they immediately called in an Rx for a "magic mouthwash" which helped a lot. 

    Good luck and best wishes,

    Sue

     

     

    Ditto what Sue said

    Being a Sue myself, I must agree with everything Sue said in her post (which was excellent, thank you). 

    And Sue, I'm so glad you went for a second opinion. I've dealt with (and have) Doctor's whose second language is American, one of which I could never understand, and its not a good option. My Onocologist is Indian, but he speaks excellent English, just with an Indian accent. He's also an excellent Oncologist. 

    Sue - Trubrit