Rang the bell!!!!!!!

Moki
Moki Member Posts: 53
in Head and Neck Cancer #1

After a week of break due to an extended Thanksgiving vacation and few days to recover from swelling of the alloderm they put in during surgery, I finally rang the bell today!

It has been a very challenging journey, especially emotionally, but I learned a lot about myself and also it gave me a new perspective about family and friends.

I learned that my mind is the most powerful part of myself and sometime it did serve me well, but it did also put me in bad situation:

6 weeks after removal of my parotid gland along with MEC and a 4 cm facial nerve whre he was wrapped around (they did nerve graft and static sling during the same surgery), I started radiation (50G + 10G of booster). The first week I was really anxious about side effects I read about and also my doctor and nurse read through and wanted me to aknowledge by signing. I was weak, nauseated, headache, etc. I tried to forget about side effects and I was able to put my mind in a good place through meditation and exercise: my energy came back and I felt normal again. I was happy and not worried about radiation anymore till when, at about week 5, I started to read all the posting about horrible side effects....yes, my mind went there again and here you go, I started to feel them all! My doctor was good enough to give me a "chiil pill" and boom, I was able to finish strong. I just have a spotty dry mouth, lost tons of hair in the back of my head, a swallen ear and reddish skin, but for the rest I am good. My taste buds are surprisingly back.

I learned that I am able to absorb just a bit of information, not too much otherwise I get overwelmed and the my body follow me down the hill. I thought I was tougher than I am in  reality.

I have tons of friends and family around, but now I can count in 2 hands the ones that really care about me. To many excuses: I did not want to bother you, but I have been kept update by others....I did not call you because I did not know what to say to cheer you up.....well, my close family and true firends have been on my side every day and I am extremely lucky to have them in my life.

I also want to thank you this forum for the words of encouragement. I read a lot of your stories and many time I got chills while reading them. You are much stronger than me and I have a lot to learn from you: brave, courageous and positive!

 

Monica

Comments

  • CivilMatt
    CivilMatt Member Posts: 4,722 Member
    #2
    whew, that's over

    Monica,

    Congratulations on ringing that bell.  Did you get all the fun out of your mask?

    Relax, but be aware the learning is not over.  Keep drinking lots of water, stay hydrated and fill up on nourishment.

    Best,

    Matt

  • Sailor123
    Sailor123 Member Posts: 97
    #3
    Congratulations Monica.  I am

    Congratulations Monica.  I am so happy that you have completed your treatment.  I'm seven months ahead of you and can honestly say things are really starting to get back to normal.  It was a long road but there is an end and you will make it there.  Your so lucky to have your taste back.  I'm still waiting for mine.  Hang in there and take it from me, there will be gifts but they may not reveal themselves for a while.  

  • phrannie51
    phrannie51 Member Posts: 4,716
    #4
    I think you're

    short changing yourself in the strength deparment.  You got through this....and that my dear takes STRENGTH in capital letters!!  Nobody ever did this without a few down times....that's just the way it is.

    So......congrats on finishing rads....that part is over over over!!!!  Now you can rest up, heal into your new self, and you are among the few in this world who truly knows who your friends are.

    p

  • Moki
    Moki Member Posts: 53
    #5
    phrannie51 said:

    I think you're

    short changing yourself in the strength deparment.  You got through this....and that my dear takes STRENGTH in capital letters!!  Nobody ever did this without a few down times....that's just the way it is.

    So......congrats on finishing rads....that part is over over over!!!!  Now you can rest up, heal into your new self, and you are among the few in this world who truly knows who your friends are.

    p

    Yes, knowing who your true friends are

    is a bless. I feel very lucky that I have 10 truly amazing friends who suffered with me, cheered me up the entire time, they were with me morally and took time away from their busy lives and family to visit and pumper me when I needed them. THIS IS A GREAT GIFT I got from this awful situation. Friendship cannot be forced or bought.

    Also, my parents left their lives in Italy to stay with my family for 3 months, helping me caring for my 3 young kids, cooking for me and supporting me daily.

    My brother and family changed their summer plan to Europe last minute to come watching the kids while I flew to Los Angeles for my surgery.

    My husband has been working day and night to recover for lost time he took while I needed him; he has been my guardian angel the all time.

    While I am counting the blessings, now i need to focus on the healing, my face is still 1/2 paralized and it is going to take a long time to recover: I am going to blink again and I definetely going to smile to my kids again!!!!!  

  • hwt
    hwt Member Posts: 2,328 Member
    #6
    Moki said:

    Yes, knowing who your true friends are

    is a bless. I feel very lucky that I have 10 truly amazing friends who suffered with me, cheered me up the entire time, they were with me morally and took time away from their busy lives and family to visit and pumper me when I needed them. THIS IS A GREAT GIFT I got from this awful situation. Friendship cannot be forced or bought.

    Also, my parents left their lives in Italy to stay with my family for 3 months, helping me caring for my 3 young kids, cooking for me and supporting me daily.

    My brother and family changed their summer plan to Europe last minute to come watching the kids while I flew to Los Angeles for my surgery.

    My husband has been working day and night to recover for lost time he took while I needed him; he has been my guardian angel the all time.

    While I am counting the blessings, now i need to focus on the healing, my face is still 1/2 paralized and it is going to take a long time to recover: I am going to blink again and I definetely going to smile to my kids again!!!!!  

    Moncia

    Love your spirit! I think most of us come out of this stronger souls with a new perspective and stronger relationships. Sounds as if you are blessed with a loving family. Happy to say, I am too.

    The hard part is in your rearview mirror now. God bless you in your recovery.

    Candi

  • Hondo
    Hondo Member Posts: 6,636 Member
    #7
    Hi Monica


    Happy for you keep doing what you are doing. Sometime it is hard to see the end from the beginning at first. That is what CSN is here for to give help and encouragement that you will make it and you will ring the bell.

     

    Take care

    Tim Hondo   

  • Duggie88
    Duggie88 Member Posts: 760 Member
    #8
    Way ta go

    Great News Monica. You now lived through Ground Hog Day with Bill Murray. Like Matt said keep hydrated and realize just because it's over it's not back to normal all that quickly, some things yes others no.

    It's not that they are not true friends, sometimes they can't handle the situation your in. You have to recognize their capabilities. You would never expect a blind friend to run a relay race with you. Just my three cents (inflation)

    Heal on

          Jeff

  • wmc
    wmc Member Posts: 1,804
    #9
    Ring that Bell proudly

    Yes ring the bell ...loud. You have done so well and made it down the bumpy road. Now you're on the recovery road which is a littler slower and still has some bumps, but take each day at a time. Celebrate each little progress you maks as it is a major one for us. Slowley you will see some of the numbness is gone. I will always have the left side of my jaw numb from my ear to the center of my chin, but it's ok, and doesn't bother me anylonger. 

    You have learned about how some friends just can't deal with illness. They just don't know what to say. It's ok, just let them know it's ok and so are you. Most will come back and others just can't be around illness. You have not lost anyone but learned, and found who is really there for you. Healling can be slow but it just has it's own pace and differant for us all. You might still have some days you just need to vent and we're all here for you, or you just want to share an accomplishment, we are here fot that as well. Most of all, be proud, you fought the beast and won. We will keep you and your family in our prayers.

    Bill

  • debbiejeanne
    debbiejeanne Member Posts: 3,102 Member
    #10
    Monica, congrats on ringing

    Monica, congrats on ringing the bell!!  i'm doing a happy dance for you.  you're right about friends, they seem to disappear when we have cancer.  I found i have one true friend but I'm thankful to have her.  its sad, but it is what it is.  oh well, you have a good reason to celebrate, now dance!!

    God bless you,

    dj

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