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having a song in your head

foxhd's picture

I've posted this in the kidney canceer section. It must be appropriate for most others also.

When people have good intentions and say things like, "We could all be hit by a bus anytime and could die. So don't worry about having cancer. So I asked, "For how many minutes in the last year have you thought about dieing from having been hit by a bus?" Of course the answer was zero. So I asked, "Have you ever had a song get stuck in your head and you can't get it out?" The answer is that everyone has had that happen. So I explained that having cancer is always in our thoughts. 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, month in and month out. It never leaves our thought process. It is like having a song get stuck in your head. It just doesn't go away. They start to get the idea.

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mlsutcliffe89178's picture

Funny you should mention it, but I've had a similar discussion with people I know. I have never had cancer before but my 30 year old sister just passed away on the 16th of June from Leukemia. Being a caregiver to someone with cancer is not the same as being afflicted by it, but you feel the pain of not being able to help more or fix what is plaguing them. I have thought about cancer 24/7 since my sister was diagnosed, from the point of being tested for bone marrow donation to today. Now that she has passed away people say that I should be relieved and I don't have to live with her pain or think about it. Not a day has gone by that I have been able to stop thinking of her or her cancer. So yes, it is like having a song stuck in your head. Thank you for your post.

 

 

Tinsky's picture

Right, that is an interesting thought. The question is if it is a good or a bad song. Of course you would say bad, but sometimes I also perceive a good efffect from listening to the bad song. Especially in those moments when I realize that I am still here. Iw as diagnosed 2 years ago with pancreatic cancer. Despite all the **** we have to go through I sometimes feel much more present in this world. more alive. and for me this is the good side of the bad song. 

 

thanks for this post, was very inspiring.

tinsky

Farmer74's picture

Yes! As a wife, that song has kept we awake at night and given me nightmares. It has taken over a year to reach on internet because I was constantly trying to learn about RCC.  Sometimes, I am the cheerleader cheering him on and then I get alone and want to crawl under the bed.  I am lucky to have him today and keep telling myself to enjoy our 2 girls & family life. And yes I could get hit by a bus too or get a cancer diagnosis myself. But when I look at him, I know it now and it hurts.  Keep going.  We have to keep going. 

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