Jun 21, 2014 - 8:40 am
I need help and support from anyone who is listening. I am going on 5 yrs after suffering with invasive ductal. The tumor was over 5 cm. My lymph nodes were not involved. I was HER negative. The size puts me into a stage 2b. I am always tortured by thoughts of a recurrence. I have panic attacks and take .5 clonazepam twice daily. I drink too much wine which is bad for my cancer but can't stop. I tested positive for gene mutation and had bilateral as well as hysterectomy. I made it through the chem, surgeries and radiation but had steadily been falling apart since. Lost my job last August. I have seen psychiatrist and therapist in the past. I don't like the antidepressants. They don't work well. I am forced to sell my home and am moving in with my partner on July 3rd. I'm scared of everything. To top it off, my almost 16 yr old cat is dying of renal failure. I can't seem to function. I do exercise every day for almost 2 hrs but have little joy in my life although I am a new grandmother and have so much to be grateful for. Please let me hear from someone. I need support. This cancer has almost destroyed me mentally and emotionally. Thank you for listening.