Have You told to many people what disease You have? I mean in the beginning.

Hi

 

My case is so new and uncertain that it has not yet been topical to tell about it to many people, I haven’t got any diagnosis yet and I’m waiting for scraping. But the way the gynegologists have commented the ultrasound pictures, is a little bit  alarming. This forum knows much more about my situation than the people around me.

 

At work has I told to my boss in confidence that I’ll go to a hospital in the beginning of July but I don’t know how long time it takes. He is very nice and understanding.

 

Now I have no desire to inform many other people about my case in my daily environment. I have sent e-post to a friend who lives in another town. I prefer first to discuss with people who are good friends of mine but who do not live in the neigbourhood.

 

I haven’t told to my grown-up children, them must I tell before I go to the hospital.

 

How did you feel in the beginning, was it easy to talk about cancer or maybe-cancer?

 

 

Henna

 

Comments

  • Stabler
    Stabler Member Posts: 51
    My husband was away in

    My husband was away in another state.  (schooling for the Army) when I found out I had cancer.  My sister went with me to the doctor when I got the news and we both just cried.  I then called my son and mom and told them.  The course my husband was taking was really hard.  They had to study everynight for a 500 question test they had every day, so I really didn't want to tell him and add that burden on top of it because he only had one more week to go.  But my doctor, mom and sister told me I had better tell him.  He found out over the phone.  He did say he would come home, but I told him to stay and finsh the couse because there really wasn't anything he could do here. 

    I told my boss and his secretary and that I would have to be out for awhile, so to make sure that our corporate office knew this and to make sure I had all the insurance papers ready.  (Our company was sold and bought by by an out of state company six months earlier and we were all rehired and had just gotten our insurance)  These were the only people that knew.  I came in the following day and everyone that worked there came up to me and said how sorry they were that I had cancer.  I asked how they found out and they would just say they heard it around.  I was mad.  Not only did my work place know, but people around the city (My boss was also the Mayor of the city), I was put on several prayer lists at churches, and then other relatives found out.  I knew it would get out, I just didn't think it would be that fast. (not even 24 hrs)

    I was really a nervous wreck when I found out.  I couldn't concentrate at work.  I would pace a lot.  I think a lot of that was caused by what I was I was reading on the internet. Too much information.  So I made a promise to myself not to look up anything else on the internet.  I felt much better after talking to the specialist.  He really put my mind at ease and I was finally able to get a good nights sleep after talking to him.

    Good Luck,

    Debbie

     

  • ConnieSW
    ConnieSW Member Posts: 1,678 Member
    Stabler said:

    My husband was away in

    My husband was away in another state.  (schooling for the Army) when I found out I had cancer.  My sister went with me to the doctor when I got the news and we both just cried.  I then called my son and mom and told them.  The course my husband was taking was really hard.  They had to study everynight for a 500 question test they had every day, so I really didn't want to tell him and add that burden on top of it because he only had one more week to go.  But my doctor, mom and sister told me I had better tell him.  He found out over the phone.  He did say he would come home, but I told him to stay and finsh the couse because there really wasn't anything he could do here. 

    I told my boss and his secretary and that I would have to be out for awhile, so to make sure that our corporate office knew this and to make sure I had all the insurance papers ready.  (Our company was sold and bought by by an out of state company six months earlier and we were all rehired and had just gotten our insurance)  These were the only people that knew.  I came in the following day and everyone that worked there came up to me and said how sorry they were that I had cancer.  I asked how they found out and they would just say they heard it around.  I was mad.  Not only did my work place know, but people around the city (My boss was also the Mayor of the city), I was put on several prayer lists at churches, and then other relatives found out.  I knew it would get out, I just didn't think it would be that fast. (not even 24 hrs)

    I was really a nervous wreck when I found out.  I couldn't concentrate at work.  I would pace a lot.  I think a lot of that was caused by what I was I was reading on the internet. Too much information.  So I made a promise to myself not to look up anything else on the internet.  I felt much better after talking to the specialist.  He really put my mind at ease and I was finally able to get a good nights sleep after talking to him.

    Good Luck,

    Debbie

     

    To tell or not

    I told very few people in the beginning.  I guess I needed time to come to terms with my diagnosis plus I'm a pretty private person.  After my surgery (laparoscopic) I became more open.  Of course the side effects of chemo made it pretty obvious.  I don't have extended family nearby so most of those people still don't know.

  • NoTimeForCancer
    NoTimeForCancer Member Posts: 3,360 Member
    Henna, please try to stop and

    Henna, please try to stop and take a breath.  It sounds like you are going to go in and have a procedure to see what is going.  Please check to see what they plan on doing.  A D&C and a hysterectomy are very, very different and most doctors don't rush in without knowing what they are dealing with. 

    You might want to consider telling your children you need to go in and get things checked out as I suspect you will not be able to drive yourself home and will need some help from someone. 

    For me, I did not tell anyone what was going on until I had a diagnosis.  I didn't want to alarm my loved ones unnecessarily. 

    Again, try to take a breath.  Ask questions and try to relax. 

  • Kaleena
    Kaleena Member Posts: 2,088 Member
    First of all, when I found

    First of all, when I found out that I had cancer, it was a total surprise.  I was having problems and needed a total hysterectomy.  On my follow-up exam after the hysterectomy, I was told that they fouond cancer in my uterus and left ovary.   It was such a shock since I had a laparascopy and an ultrasound many months before which came back "normal".   When I had to go back to surgery for staging, the only thing I told my sons (who were young at the time) that I was having "female problems".  Even when I went through chemo I didn't tell them.  However, when I had a recurrence late 2009, I did tell them.  I am not sure whether that was right or wrong but at the time it felt right.

    It really is a personal choice.   I was stlll able to work and did as much as I can.  But don't get too ahead of yourself.   Stay positive but don't make any rash decisions until you know exactly what is going on.

    My best to you.

    Kathy

  • dkdrew
    dkdrew Member Posts: 15
    for me, I want everyone to know

    when I got the diagnosis of cancer I told my husband, got him calmed down. Then I told my daugther, got her to stop crying. Then I called my other daughter, then my parents, then told my congregation. The next day I posted it on Facebook. I wanted all my family and friends to know. I don't like keeping secrets and I think it keeps me grounded for others to know. Of course, I didn't think it was going to be that bad. It was quite a blow when the doctor said I had a rarer cancer than what they originally thought. I thought then that maybe I should be more private about things but then said no thats not me. I post updates on my health on facebook so no one has to ask. For me, I'd rather they all know and go on this journey with me.