Apr 02, 2014 - 10:49 pm
I'm new to this board. I thought maybe reaching out to those who are going through the same experience would be helpful.
My mom had a very aggressive brain cancer that caught my family totally by surprise. She was sick for 2 years with the disease rapidy taking over the end of summer and through her death.
The experience of watching the person I loved the most in life and felt the closest to, get sicker and sicker was gut wrenching. She didn't handle it well, it was her second diagnosis with cancer and so was not up to fight again. I tried my best to give her strenght to fight, and she did but in the end she still lost her life and suffered.
I'm now left feeling extremely sad. Sad that she had to suffer so horribly, sad that she is no longer here to live life, sad that she will miss so much of my life and sad to live a life without her.
Every day I feel more lost and lack much energy to do much of anything outside of work. I used to be a go getter but now I feel defeated, tired of trying and not sure what I should be doing.
Can anyone relate? How did you get by? Is it ok to just ride with the sadness instead of fight it? I feel guilty for feeling sad and tired and don't want to do much?