When?

Almost a year now since I heard those words that you have cancer been through all the treatments and all. Yet it still goes off in my head when is it going to show up and where at this time? I was just wondering if anyone else has these thoughts?

Comments

  • debbiejeanne
    debbiejeanne Member Posts: 3,102 Member
    omnedon, i think EVERY cancer

    omnedon, i think EVERY cancer patient goes thru these thots, especially if something new pops up!  we all first think cancer.  but then we settle down and get our thoughts back into perspective, well, sometimes and sometimes we don't calm down until we see the doc and he says everything is ok, at least that's how it is for me.  i feel what you are thinking is normal and eventually you will learn to put that thot to the back of your mind and go on living.  we have all learned to do this.  i'm praying that this will get easier for you and that you won't waste too much time worring about something that may not happen.

    God bless you,

    dj

  • KB56
    KB56 Member Posts: 318 Member
    Thoughts

    I'm about on the same timeline as you and I think it's always in the back of our minds, especially if you feel something different in your body.   I don't dwell on it but it does enter my mind for sure and I know my family thinks about it as well and are always worried, probably more than me.

    I'm sure it will get better with time, the longer we go and keep having clean scans, checkups, etc.

    Keith

  • HAWVET
    HAWVET Member Posts: 318
    KB56 said:

    Thoughts

    I'm about on the same timeline as you and I think it's always in the back of our minds, especially if you feel something different in your body.   I don't dwell on it but it does enter my mind for sure and I know my family thinks about it as well and are always worried, probably more than me.

    I'm sure it will get better with time, the longer we go and keep having clean scans, checkups, etc.

    Keith

    My thoughts

    It used to enter my mind a lot.  Since it has been quite a few years since treatment, my thoughts now are that I hope it is not cancer when experiencing pain or other ailments.

  • cureitall66
    cureitall66 Member Posts: 913
    Time...

    Omnedon,

    I don't know if the thought of cancer will ever leave our minds after this experience.

    I was a caregiver, not the actual patient, but I know from his thoughts and comments and my own thoughts about this process, that it's not been easy.  He has been out of treatment 18 months and has had to deal with some minor physical issues, but aside of that I think he is doing well mentally. I've noticed that he is much more emotional to things than what he use to be.  He's always been a very caring person, but this has put a whole new perspective on life for him and I'm sure it has been for many others here. 

    I think over time it will get better.  We need to surround ourselves around positive people and especially those who know what you've gone through.  They will help you live each day.  Try to keep yourself busy and believe that you've seen the last of cancer. Be happy with what you have in each day.  As a caregiver who has not had cancer, but felt the anguish through it all with my loved one, I've learned to appreciate life so much more than I ever thought possible.  It's too bad there isn't another way to have this happen.....and everyone could look at life differently.

    Hang in there. It's tough, but you're never alone.  There are many people here that have experienced this and can offer more advice.

    God Bless,

    ~C

  • CivilMatt
    CivilMatt Member Posts: 4,722 Member
    time

    omnedon,

    Short answer, YES!!!

    Plus, side effects and everything I ever thought about before.

    Time and satisfactory check-ups helps reduce the time spent on less fun thoughts.  Having cancer helps to prioritize things in life, but acting on those priorities is something I am still working on.

    I can say, you should feel better with time, if not, then seek out solutions.  If cancer has taught me anything it is the finality of time.

    Matt

  • phrannie51
    phrannie51 Member Posts: 4,716
    It's been two years

    and one month since I heard those words....and my mind is free of the word cancer for up to 10 minutes now.  There are times that the thought does consume me.....where I feel fearful and scared....but most of the time, it's an in and out thought.  I mean it's hard forget it completely, when you have a water bottle by your side 24/7....when you eat a treat in the grocery store, and find out you've just made a BIG mistake, and ingredients for homemade soup of some type is on every grocery list....the side effects keep us connected to the past....I just tell myself "well, you don't have cancer today, so move it girl". :)

    p

  • KB56
    KB56 Member Posts: 318 Member
    CivilMatt said:

    time

    omnedon,

    Short answer, YES!!!

    Plus, side effects and everything I ever thought about before.

    Time and satisfactory check-ups helps reduce the time spent on less fun thoughts.  Having cancer helps to prioritize things in life, but acting on those priorities is something I am still working on.

    I can say, you should feel better with time, if not, then seek out solutions.  If cancer has taught me anything it is the finality of time.

    Matt

    Priorities

    matt, you're correct about the cancer making you think about what's important and prioritizing things.  I'm definitely better than I was but it's something you have to consciously think about or it's easy to slip back to some old ways.    Not that those are all bad but I just want to do better with what's really important. 

     

    Keith

     

  • donfoo
    donfoo Member Posts: 1,771 Member
    wondering?

    Just curious if visiting a site like this frequently affects the level of anxiety about cancer and recurrence? One logical view is reading this stuff everyday keeps it fresh in one's mind.

  • Fire34
    Fire34 Member Posts: 365
    OM

    My thought is why worry over something you have no control over. It will drive you crazy.

    Best Wishes

    Dave

  • Hondo
    Hondo Member Posts: 6,636 Member
    Ticking time bob

    I too like many always worried about when and if it comes back what will I do. Now days it just does not bother me anymore, I deal with so many others who are going through the fight I just don’t have the time to think about myself. I put it in Gods hand and go to sleep at night without a care in this world about me.

     

    Hondo

  • cureitall66
    cureitall66 Member Posts: 913
    donfoo said:

    wondering?

    Just curious if visiting a site like this frequently affects the level of anxiety about cancer and recurrence? One logical view is reading this stuff everyday keeps it fresh in one's mind.

    Don....you have a point..

    Don,

    You have a point there, however, I think it is good to check in and out of here from time to time.  I think it can be a "reasuring" opportunity also....seeing and talking to others that you know are also having those feelings.... The feeling of not being alone.

    Everyone has to know there limits and what they can handle.  If the site gets overwhelming at times, then it would probably be wise to take a little break. 

    But....very good point you brought up.

    ~C 

  • hwt
    hwt Member Posts: 2,328 Member
    Hondo said:

    Ticking time bob

    I too like many always worried about when and if it comes back what will I do. Now days it just does not bother me anymore, I deal with so many others who are going through the fight I just don’t have the time to think about myself. I put it in Gods hand and go to sleep at night without a care in this world about me.

     

    Hondo

    yes, but...

    don't let cancer take away any more time from you. I am on my 3rd tx for recurrence and am now glad that I did not let my mind wander too much for the first 15 months that I was NED. I would tell myself to live as though those were the good ole days just in case they were. Low and behold, I did not know what was in store for me. I still tell myself to "take it as it comes and deal with it". Don't waste energy worrying about something that may or may not happen.