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I am so alone. I don't know if I still want to fight this or not.

miserablyhappy013
Posts: 1
Joined: Dec 2013

I was diagnosed with liver cancer last month. I told my very best friend and my boyfriend about it but they don't dseem to believe me. I am too far away from my family and I hven't told them the news yet. I was diagnoasd last month and I only have 5 months and 17 days to live. My boyfriend just broke up with me and my best friend is telling me that I should fight the fact that I only have 5 months and 17 days to live. Life is so short for me. I haven't told the people that I love with regards to how I feel. I lack motivation and inspiration already. i can't seem to move. I don't want to fight this thing all alone cause if I'm going to be left all alone, I might as well not fight it. Help me please. I don;t know waht to do aymore.

SDickerson
Posts: 44
Joined: Aug 2010

I can only imagne how you are feeling. I don't know if you spiritual or not, but without God I would not have been able to make it through. 

 

I was diagnosed 3 years ago with agressive breast cancer. I had chemo, surgery, radition and then chemo again. Went through chemo for 9 months and then was diagnosed with a spot on my lung I have been going to chemo every week now for the past 2 years and last week I was told I have a small spot on my liver. Some days I can hardly walk and I have been in so much pain for the past 3 years. I have a wonderful husband and other family, but my faith in God is what keeps me going.

 

When I was first diangnosed I was told that my outlook is 50% of the battle. Since then I know that I will beat this deacease. I may have to be on chemo and have pain and disconfort but I will live my life as my God will have me to live.

 

Don't give up...God loves you and I love you. Praying for you...

 

Shannon

suzanne-yes's picture
suzanne-yes
Posts: 27
Joined: Jan 2006

I'm sorry about your diagnosis.  It sounds you, like I once did, marked a big red X on the calendar for when your life would cease to exist.  I've now outlived that prognosis by years.  There is no crystal ball and only the best of opinions and ideas when a time frame is given.  Reach out for support so that you are able to move forward and determine which direction is best for you.  Learn as much as you can about your diagnosis and try to make informed decisions that work best for YOUR life.  A hospital social worker may be able to provide good insight.

Suzanne

kohsin
Posts: 27
Joined: Apr 2010

I am suprised that you know exactly how long you have to the days. I don't know the detail but I do know there are treatment available so you should ask for 2nd, 3rd opinion if you haven't done so. I was told I probaly had 2 years max, but after the surgery removed my 9 CM tumor (which is the best option) and I am free of cancer. This was back in 2010.

Like others said, don't give up. God Bless.

coastie
Posts: 2
Joined: Nov 2013

Hi , I am in a similar position, hep c , cirrosis and now liver cancer I was diagnosed 6 weeks ago.  I don't really know what to say as I am still getting used to this.

What I can say is you don't really know how long you have, if you had been diagnosed say 2 months earlier I bet they still would have said 6 months. From what I have been reading everyone is different, some seem to have actually lasted quite a while. The docs have put me on a course of Nexavar, once again they say you get another 3 months of life but these are just averages. I know it's hard to stay upbeat and get through the day but that is the struggle we are up against, try to live for today, do one thing that you enjoy at least once a day, ( I go swimming ), try to eat well, it won't cure you but you will feel better.

Take a look at the Macmillan website  http://community.macmillan.org.uk/home.aspx  lots of good information there.

I know how you feel, I have had many bad thoughts over the last few months and it's hard to be cheerful with so many dissapointments.  I take a small dose of Diazapan in the evening , this at least gives me a little time to not dwell on everything.

I hope you are feeling better.

 

Love and Peace

 

Mick

flkhong
Posts: 8
Joined: Apr 2013

Hi, please don't give up and seek help. My husband had HCC (6cm lession) 9 months ago and he went through the operation and he is doing fine now. We change our livestyle by swtiching to vegan, juices and vegetables smoothies. There is a lot you can do to make yourself healthier. Please don't give up.

Angel322
Posts: 26
Joined: Mar 2011

Hi...I read your message and wanted to contact you. My heart goes out to you...you deserve so much to have friends and family around you, holding you up through this. I'm sorry your doctors felt a need to give you a timeline, but thats nonsense...no one but the lord above can say when its our time for sure. Fight this thing...your boyfriend doesn't sound like someone worth having in your life if he would break up with you when you need him the most. I'm sooo sorry for that. You dont' need any additional heartache...just know you matter, you are important, people care! I don't know you but I care and want you to fight this. Please contact me if you would like a friend...sending you love and prayers. Sincerely, Angel

bernajohn
Posts: 1
Joined: Mar 2013

I too was diagnosed with liver cancer last june 2011..It was discovered accidentically cause i didn't know that i already had a tumor a 3cm size..At first i was shocked cause i thought that i was going to die..Because cancer is very serious illness..It's almost 3 yrs.now but i'm still fighting after 3 opearations..Don't lose hope because if you are then the more you will be defeated..You have to think of a strong reason for you to live..And pray to the Lord above to give you more strength and determination and a will to live..

cathyhd
Posts: 8
Joined: Sep 2004

Those timelines don't mean anything.  They are averages.  You don't have an expiration date.  The average lifespan of someone with my diagnosis was 3-12 months.  Now, it is 4.5 years later.  Currently cancer free.  No treatment or surgery was a big deal.  Didn't lose hair, never threw up, wasn't bedridden.  

It's all about attitude at this point.  Your loved ones can't live with someone wanting to commit suicide from lack of trying.  However, you sound like you are depressed.  Did you know that many cancers can cause depression.  Good news is that a little pill a day can take that away (antidepressant) that your internist can prescribe.  Can't sleep from the fear?  A 1/2 a pill puts you there is 30 minutes.  Tell your people you are going to beat this.  It is beatable.  If your doctor doesn't think so, get a better doctor.  A more optomistic doctor.  You deserve that.  Tell everyone to live and laugh and be normal around you.  You want to laugh and share in all their little ups and downs.  Well, not their big downs.  Surround yourself with positive people.  Get a church group of friends.  Get counseling if you have something holding you back!  Cognitive style.  

Say:  I AM A SURVIVOR!  I AM MY BIGGEST ADVOCATE!  Take a supportive, positive friend to your appointments.  Let your family know.  Maybe you move there if they have a great hospital.  You need great.

 

Take care.

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