My sad goodbye

mmr19
mmr19 Member Posts: 75
in Esophageal Cancer #1

Last Monday my dear husband Lou passed away after battling this EC beast for 3years 8months.

I haven't posted in a while, and though the people that helped me through this back in the beginning of our fight are no longer on the board, I felt the need to come back and say goodbye. Too often people stop writing and you wonder.

Lou was diagnosed in Dec 2009. Stage 4. After the initial radiation and full guns chemo, he was doing ok for 2-1/2 years while continuing chemo. Then last August the tumor in his esophagus started to regrow. He went through proton radiation the end of last year. And while that took care of the tumor in his esophagus, it was discovered that there were nodules in both lungs. Chemo had no effect. The nodules in both lungs continued to progress rapidly regardless of Lou's brave determination to fight.

I just want people to know that no matter what, there is always hope. Lou was told in the beginning that with chemo he would have about 1 year. He exceeded their expectations. He liked to tell his drs that he was beyond his expiration date. His first goal was to see his 60th birthday, which he did. Then he wanted to see 62 and his first social security check. He got to see that this year.

Though it was a very difficult battle, as you all well know it can be, it still brought us closer together as we fought the beast together. We were still able to make happy memories and celebrate our 34th anniversary.

I admired Lou's courage. He will forever be my hero.

Thanks for listening.

Marta

Comments

  • paul61
    paul61 Member Posts: 1,391 Member
    #2
    Wishing you the best

    Marta,

    I am so sorry to hear that Lou has left us. I remember your postings. Lou and I were diagnosed about the same time. I am glad that Lou continued well beyound his doctor's expectations. Thanks for coming back and letting us know about Lou, sometimes when you don't hear from soneone in a long time you hope for the best, but assume the worst.

    Lou is now beyound the suffering of cancer. 

    Best Regards,

    Paul Adams

    Grand Blanc, Michigan
    DX 10/2009 T2N1M0  Stage IIB - Ivor Lewis Surgery  12/3/2009 - Post Surgery Chemotherapy 2/2009 – 6/2009
    Cisplatin, Epirubicin, 5 FU - Three Year Survivor

     

  • dfd24
    dfd24 Member Posts: 91
    #3
    LOU

    I am very sorry . All my condolences . I understand exactly what you mean that it brought you closer together and that you admired his courage  . Also, I think it is true, you must always believe there is hope.

     

    all the best,

    danièle

  • lindadanis
    lindadanis Member Posts: 235
    #4
    So sorry

    Hi, I do remember you as my late husband, Eddie, was diagnosed the same year, October 7, 2009.  Unfortunately, Ed lost his battle less than a year later, he passed away September 15, 2010.  My mom also passed away one week after Eddie.  You may remember me and my story.  I do jump on this site once in a while to see what's going on and see what is happening to some of my old friends.

    Unfortunately, this cancer is a total beast and way too many people have passed from this horrible disease.   I have moved on, sold my family home a year ago and my daughter and I relocated about 1/2 mile from the house we shared with Eddie.  Life is not the same nor did I think it would be without my partner in life.  There is not a day that I do not think about him, miss him and wish he was with us.  Eddie was 56 year old when he died, way too young.  I'm glad your husband lasted as long as he did but still passed way too young also.

     

    Please remember all the memories you shared with him, the good/bad and indifferent.  These memories are what get you through the darkess days.

     

    If you would ever like to talk, please inbox me and I will reply to you.

    Wishing you all the peace,

     

    Love

    Linda

     

  • Heeran
    Heeran Member Posts: 171
    #5
    Very sorry for your loss

    Hi, I'm very sorry to hear about your loss.  I'm at my mom's house as we speak doing hospice and I can't imagine the double loss you had.  What a fighter you both were. Very happy to hear he had beaten the "odds" with having more time with you and loved ones.  Thank you for coming back to this board.  My thoughts are with you and your family.

    Heeran

  • Christine135
    Christine135 Member Posts: 71
    #6
    My heart goes out to you

    I too lost my husband July 28th after 2 years of fighting. May all the beautiful memories that you created over the years stay forever with you and in your heart. Lou will be with you always and forever just as my Mike will be. Just know that Lou is safe now and nothing will ever hurt him again. That is where I draw my strength from, knowing Mike is safe and there are no more tears for him. It makes letting him go a little easier.

    Take care of yourself.

    Christine

  • birdiequeen
    birdiequeen Member Posts: 319
    #7

    It is painful to learn of another loss to this terrable cancer.  I remember the sweet picture you had as your id.  So glad Lou made goals and meet them on his journey.  I will be praying for you as you face this loss.

    Thank you for keeping us updated. 

    Lee Ann 

  • TerryV
    TerryV Member Posts: 887
    #8
    I'm so sorry for your loss!

    Marta,

     

    We have a group of EC widows on Facebook if you would ever care to join others that "get it".  Many of us started here and after losing our husbands, relocated to FB.  If you would like to be added, please mesasge me here with your Facebook info.  Our group on FB is considered "secret" which means I would have to invite you.

    My thoughts and prayers are with you.

     

    Terry V

    PROUD wife to Nick, age 49
    lost battle to EC, June 19, 2012

  • mmr19
    mmr19 Member Posts: 75
    #9
    TerryV said:

    I'm so sorry for your loss!

    Marta,

     

    We have a group of EC widows on Facebook if you would ever care to join others that "get it".  Many of us started here and after losing our husbands, relocated to FB.  If you would like to be added, please mesasge me here with your Facebook info.  Our group on FB is considered "secret" which means I would have to invite you.

    My thoughts and prayers are with you.

     

    Terry V

    PROUD wife to Nick, age 49
    lost battle to EC, June 19, 2012

    Thanks

    Thanks to all for your kind responses.

    Every day I just continue to put one foot in front of the other. It gets me there.

    Terry- Thanks for the invite. I sent you a message.

    Blessings to everyone.

    Marta

  • TerryV
    TerryV Member Posts: 887
    #10
    mmr19 said:

    Thanks

    Thanks to all for your kind responses.

    Every day I just continue to put one foot in front of the other. It gets me there.

    Terry- Thanks for the invite. I sent you a message.

    Blessings to everyone.

    Marta

    I will watch for your next message

    Looking forward to adding you (that doesn't sound right) whenever you are ready.

     

    {Hugs} Marta as you face the next weeks and months.  Please know there are others fighting the same emotional battles as you.  We care!

     

    Terry

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