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Kikz (Karen) - how are you?

lovesanimals's picture
lovesanimals
Posts: 1227
Joined: Sep 2011

I hate to bug you if you want to lay low, but I was wondering how you are doing?  It's been a while since we've heard from you but I know you have a lot of challenges and a heck of a lot of crap to deal with.

Please post when you can.

Kelly

kikz's picture
kikz
Posts: 1267
Joined: Jun 2010

I have been lurking but didn't have anything new to say as I am still feeling so tired and was waiting for pet scan results.  Got results today and there is no evidence of disease.  Then why do I feel so glum?  Doctor said if I recur again and most likely will, the NED time will be less.  Why do they feel compelled to keep reminding us of our gloomy future?  I was already feeling crappy maybe because I haven't felt good since chemo started.  I think Carlene's death haunts me because she was a year ahead of me in the journey and the thought of such a strong woman losing the fight scares me.

I know me and once the dust settles I'll feel better.  I have to let information sink in and then I can move forward.  When I feel stronger physically I will feel stronger mentally and emotionally.  This is just the kind of talk I was trying to avoid bringing to the board.

So enough of that, I am dancing with NED again and he is just as smooth as ever.

 

Love you all.

Karen 

lovesanimals's picture
lovesanimals
Posts: 1227
Joined: Sep 2011

Thanks for checking in!  I think you know this already but I'll say it anyway - please don't feel that your words are going to bring down the board.  We all know and understand that this journey is a rollercoaster ride of emotions and we all want to support each other through the good, the bad and the ugly.  Sometimes I think doctors say too much, especially since no one, not even doctors with all of their medical training, have a crystal ball into the future.  I know what you mean about Carlene's death.  You "knew" her longer than me but I felt a real shock, with sadness and fear, to learn of her death. 

I know this is easier said than done, but please try to take one day at a time and concentrate on feeling better physically.  I'm like you; if I am in pain and discomfort physically, it is very hard to be upbeat mentally and emotionally.  In the meantime, I'm doing the happy dance that you are NED!  May NED never leave your side.

Hugs,

Kelly

wholfmeister's picture
wholfmeister
Posts: 249
Joined: Dec 2012

You don't have to sugar coat anything for us.  You don't have to be careful with your words.  This may be the only place on earth where only your true thoughts and feelings are welcome.

But I do understand how sometimes, I just don't have the energy to contribute.  Just reading what the others are posting can be so helpful.

Until you have the energy to do it yourself, I'm going to shout the sweet hallelujah for your good test results!

Alexandra's picture
Alexandra
Posts: 1198
Joined: Jul 2012

The hardest part is over. You are NED. It takes time to get out of the funk.

Love - Alexandra

scatsm's picture
scatsm
Posts: 235
Joined: Apr 2013

and hoping you will have a really long dance with NED!

Susan

 

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