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*** Some OLD AGE Jokes To Make You Laugh ***

susie09's picture
susie09
Posts: 2933
Joined: Jul 2009

Sex And The Over 90's

 

Upon hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight to her grandparent's house to visit her 95-year-old grandmother and comfort her.

When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, "He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning".

Horrified, Katie told her grandmother that two people nearly 100 years old having sex would surely be asking for trouble.

"Oh, no, my dear," replied granny. "Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring. It was just the right rhythm. Nice and slow and even. Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the Ding and out on the Dong."

She paused to wipe away a tear, and continued, "and if the damned ice cream truck hadn't come along, he'd still be alive today."    

 

  Old Money

A young man asked an old rich man how he made his money.

The old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, "Well, son, it was 1932. The depth of the Great Depression. I was down to my last nickel."

"I invested that nickel in an apple. I spent the entire day polishing the apple and, at the end of the day, I sold the apple for ten cents."

"The next morning, I invested those ten cents in two apples. I spent the entire day polishing them and sold them at 5:00 pm for 20 cents. I continued this system for a month, by the end of which I'd accumulated a fortune of $1.37."

"Then my wife's father died and left us two million dollars."                            

Megan M's picture
Megan M
Posts: 3001
Joined: Dec 2009

Thanks Susie!  Laughing

Ritzy's picture
Ritzy
Posts: 4384
Joined: Aug 2009

Very funny!

Smiley hahaha 024.gif

susie09's picture
susie09
Posts: 2933
Joined: Jul 2009

You are welcome!  I am still laughing at them!  I especially love the Sex and over 90's one. 

♥ Susie

Candi Cane
Posts: 161
Joined: May 2013

I love jokes, these especially.  Thanks!

Candi

Nana Sue
Posts: 55
Joined: Jul 2013

Laughter is always welcomed!  The world needs more of it.  Thank you for these cute jokes. 

coco2008's picture
coco2008
Posts: 406
Joined: May 2013

Today was a good day for a laugh.  Thanks for providing it.

Angie2U's picture
Angie2U
Posts: 2993
Joined: Sep 2009

Every day is a good day for a laugh and I thank you Susie for this one!

Kylez's picture
Kylez
Posts: 3765
Joined: May 2009

Ha Ha!  I love your posts Susie!

Cheryl 1
Posts: 42
Joined: Jun 2013

I can't wait to share these with my parents.  I hope they think they're funny.  LOL

Kobias
Posts: 115
Joined: Jun 2013

Both of these are very funny!  Thank you so much for posting them!

Kathy

survivorbc09
Posts: 4378
Joined: Jun 2009

You always find the funniest and cutest jokes!  Thanks!

Lynne P
Posts: 165
Joined: May 2013

Laughing hard and going to email these to my friends. 

VickiSam's picture
VickiSam
Posts: 8228
Joined: Aug 2009

laughter...  seriously!

 

Vicki Sam

JJDS
Posts: 259
Joined: Apr 2013

Kind of like VickiSam  LOL 

DianeBC's picture
DianeBC
Posts: 3888
Joined: Jun 2009

Cute Cute Cute! 

andi44's picture
andi44
Posts: 154
Joined: Jun 2013

JJDS
Posts: 259
Joined: Apr 2013

Andi, that is so cute, that pic!  And, it is true, isn't it?  Laughter is the medicine of life!

Carlee
Posts: 100
Joined: Jul 2013

I love funnies!  Thanks!

Alexis F's picture
Alexis F
Posts: 3604
Joined: May 2009

I've always enjoyed your jokes Susie!  Thank you again and keep them coming!

Lex

Nana Sue
Posts: 55
Joined: Jul 2013

Susie, I've been forwarding on your jokes to my friends!  They like opening up their email first thing and having a laugh, so, thanks again!

jnl's picture
jnl
Posts: 3873
Joined: May 2009

Laughing

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