Jul 17, 2013 - 7:04 pm
What a difference 4 months can make in the life of a cancer survivor. Last April I wasn't feeling good so I went and visisted my GP, she seemed to do every test known to man to figure out what was ailing me. At the time she determined that I had influenza b and that I'd be okay in a few weeks. A few weeks later, I was feeling no better so I told her to call my Oncologist and she did. She told me that my Onc said it was very unlikely that my cancer returned, afterall, I had a clean scan late Feb 2013. I pressed the issue, I made an appointment with my Onc, and he was kind of pissy to me, asked why he was doing the work of my GP? I told him that I knew something was wrong and I wanted a scan, which he agreed to. As it turns out my cancer is back in multiple places, liver and abdomen wall. That was 10 weeks ago, I'm back on Folfox with Certuximab and the latest scan showed "dramatic" results. It's never easy to hear that you have cancer, especially the 2nd, 3rd, and now 4th time. I wouldn't wish this on anyone.
I've been able to handle the physical part of the disease, I have no pain. I"m finding the mental part of this disease is tough to deal with. Just when you think you might have a bead on this disease, it comes back and knocks you on your ass! It's hard to deal with! I think I"m doing a great job managing this disease, however, I'm growing tired of having to deal with all of this once again.
Bottom line is this, after hearing my cancer is back for the 4th time , I now believe that I'm not going to beat this disease, but instead, I'll have to live with this disease till the day I die. And who knows when that'll be, 8.5 years ago they told me I had about 2 years.