Apr 06, 2013 - 11:14 am
I'm a 42 year old female that just finished treatment for stage 3 hodgkins lymphoma. I finished on Feb. 27th. I thought when I finished treatment I would be able to move on with life. That's not happening. I'm depressed, scared, anxious and unable to figure out where my life goes from here. I've started an antidepressant and xanax for anxiety. The antidepressant hasn't kicked in yet but the xanax does help. I have three children and I don't want them to see me crying all the time. I have a wonderful supportive husband and I feel guilty for not being better. I need to find a support group I think. My prognosis is very good but it doesn't seem to resonate with me. I'm so terrified that it will come back. I miss my old life. Everytime I look in the mirror I'm reminded of what's happened and I keep reliving it over and over in my mind. The minute I wake up it hits me really hard and I'm basically just trying to make it until I can go to bed at night. I'm getting really scared of how deep I'm sinking.