Feb 13, 2013 - 1:07 pm
I have been on and off this board more than I want to share. However, in that it makes me happy to see this community still holding together sharing in absolutely whatever, whenever, however it takes to get rid of this helacious disease. I have told my story more than a few times and share a few more than other personal things in my life to show life does get back to "normal" what ever "normal" is. Life has its ups and downs whethor we are healthy or lying in a bed not knowing if we are going to see tomorrow. For those who are sitting around pissing and moaning you could be out at the drs wearing those lacie panties and bra and or guy thong to blow them away instead of the old tighty whiteys and white cotton granny panties. I remember how uncomfortable it was alway poked and proded in my panties and lovely hospital gown. So I decided just get the prettiest laciest, undergarments I could find then when the unveiling came who was uncomfortable then. Not me, I felt great. I was skinny and not much to look at because I was 6 foot tall and maybe 115 pounds soaking wet because of chemo but it blew their minds. My dr was fantastic, but when I got sick he wasnt always the one I saw at the hospital so you have to fight back some how.
I also loved food and I wasnt going to let food be what stopped me from getting well. The smell made me sick, chemo made me sick, but I finally figured it out, I took Ativan, before my chemo I drove thru and got whopper jr on my way to chemo which was 1.5 hrs away. When I got there I did my chemo went straight to the Mexican Food restaurant and ordered the Spiciest hottest food I could get and sometime I even had a Margarita. Doc said one wouldnt hurt. But sometimes just the sound or the word and I would turn green.
Taking a bath was hard too. I could smell the minerals in the water and I would puke. So I would have my husband run a very hot bath wait for about 30 minutes for the minerals to settle and water to cool and then take a bath. Little things make huge impacts in our lives and my family thought they were stupid until they saw the impact and how i functioned. So do not knock anything until you try something.
I had Stage IV Colon Cancer they removed a baseball size tumor, I had a right hemi colectomy and 16 of 32 lymphnodes were positive.
I did a year and a half about of chemo and what they call cocktail and I am here to say that 15 years is good. Its not greats, its not perfect, but I sure as hell get to breathe in and out everyday, I have got to see my three boys are in college the oldest graduates in the spring from University of Oregon.
My life still is not perfect my spouse had a stroke from prescription meds, while I was on chemo, he became an alcolic about 4 years after chemo and got sober about 7 years ago with lifes ups and downs inbetween. I am looking at the possibility of divorce and maybe even bankruptcy, but I have 15 years I was given to watch my kids grow. I have been struggling thinking there should be some aw ha moment, but I got that the day I finished chemo I think and they said we will just watch your blood work. but thats not so either because the stress is ridiculous, but the fact that I BREATHE IN AND OUT EVERY MOMENT OF EVERYDAY, WITHOUT C BEING THERE IT IS MIRACULOUS!!!
YOU ALL KEEP KICKING CANCERS ASS AND I WILL KEEP LURKING ON HERE AS SUNDANCE ALWAYS ANOUNCES,
PS I REALLY MISS (IDOLHUNTERS)