Feb 12, 2013 - 11:32 pm
Below is me when I first was digesting my new cancer diagnosis, and the diagnosis of ovarian cancer....Now is me 11 months later...The thought of cancer is still very overwhelming for me. I've been done with chemotherapy for 3 months. I have had MY FIRST OFFICIAL FOLLOW UP WITH MY ca125 and it was 6 the same as it was at the end of chemo...what a relief. I feel better the moment after the results....knowing I M STILL KEEPING THE CANCER AT BAY. It is a comforting feeling to know that I'm still strong. Howvever, the experience has changed me......I think of my life span right now in three month increments of time, enjoyment, difficulties, tasks completed, and what I have lived to this point. After being diagnosed with cancer, it is not so easy to live a life of pure freedom of ignoring your mortality. I am not sure it is a blessing or a curse right now. I still struggle each day at what could happen and what may not happen... I also still live life to its fullest with all of its ups and downs. I wish I could only live all the "shits" and giggles..but that is not real life is it. I have to take all of its ups and downs too. Cancer,no matter where it imprints, it makes a change in how we live. It is our resposibility to live it the best we can. Best to all in remission, and to those just beginning or ending the journey we all share. Kim
Hello, I'm new to the thought of cancer. It is not that I don't understand it or know about cancer. I am a nurse practitioner and I have many patient's who have experienced or continue to experience the diagnosis of cancer. However, I am usually on the other side, the provider giving care and information. I never thought I would be on the patient side and have to experience first hand. I am a healthy 48 yer old. I've never really had any serious illness. I had four babies all healthy and now grown young women. I breastfed all of them for a significant amount of time. Now, seven days ago, I had a complete hysterectomy, bilateral salpingo-oophorectomy, omentumectomy, and full staging for ovarian cancer. My surgeons say my surgery was curative and I am waiting for the staging results. Most likely I will be planning chemotherapy. That's my story...and here is my fear! I am sure all of you have experienced the fear. Waiting for results is agonizing. Being a nurse practitioner, I of course can imagine the worst. Not knowing your future stability is unnerving. Seeing the fear in my husband's and girl's eyes is frightening! Cancer is my fear and being so new with the diagnosis the fear can be stifling. Many of you are survivors and have already experienced the newness of cancer. If you have any advice or good thoughts, I would appreciate any messages.