Jan 17, 2013 - 4:12 pm
I know I am lucky to even be here and have to make this decision. I will be 43 in March. Last year after the bmx and reconstruction my body is still exhausted. I am having really heavy periods and cannot keep iron levels up so Dr suggests either an ablasion or an IUD. With that, I have to rule out having kids. Realistically, I understood this as I was going thru treatment but it is scary to have to deal with some new health problem. It is just one more reminder that my bc really did happen.
Now that I am post treatment, just got my tattoos done!, I'm looking good and healthy. Problem is that inside I am still so tired and achey. I have gotten some great advice from you ladies about dealing with life post treatment. Most everyone does not want to hear about it. Lots of friends do not pick up my calls, but text me. Honestly, I feel they are avoiding me, or the bc. I spoke with my sister last nite for the first time in months. It was a nice conversation, she spoke about her kids- ages 6, 9 and 16. ABout how my cousin just gave birth to a baby girl, how wondeful that all is. There was no inquiry about my rehab, or my health, which has become my life, at all. The big question they have is 'when am I going to come and visit them, (and all their kids)'. I am single, so travel alone, and live in Hawaii, they live in NY. A roadtrip across the island is very difficult for me, let alone a huge trip across the country. The non-cancer people don't seem to understand how draining bc is on the body, mind and spirit. The idea of facing them all makes me uncomfortable. I realize that having a realtionship with someone invlove both sides reaching out but is hard for me to put out all that energy right now, especially since I feel they are not being so supportive with my recovery.
So, I tell you ladies this story becuase I am nervous about my first post bc health issue. I trust my Drs, and have no problem with the care they give me. It is hard dealing with the rest of the world and those who simply do not know thr true effects of cancer. It is lingering with me despite the PS telling me that I am 'cured'. Thanks for being there, you ladies are the best.