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Musings from my little corner of life

therapture
Posts: 25
Joined: Dec 2012

Being fairly new to this club, I am finding a part of myself re-awakening with all of my new emotions and experiences. I feel the need to put some things into words. I was originally a journalism major but never finished, instead falling into the world of mechanics and parts, ended up being a dealership parts department/bodyshop parts manager, and I love it. The words below are just some free thinking results I had while sitting here at the PC reading and learning about this new life I am evolving into.

*******

As I sit here, reading, messaging on a new to me, cancer survivor's forum, and absorbing infomation through a host of internet sites, I find myself realizing that while I have had the best possible diagnosis I could have, at this point, I AM a cancer patient, and the fight is never going to be over. It's a strange new club I have joined, one I really don't want to be in and had no aspirations of joining. I will probably never be able to NOT think about cancer at some point of every single day. I think about my next checkup in 6 months, almost on my birthday, and I try not to think too much about the "if's" and "maybe's".

I am a changed person, my life is changed, and the lives of my family and personal friends are also changing. In some ways it is bringing us all closer, in other ways it is drawing a line in the sand about certain aspects of my life. There are some things I will never allow in my life again, some negative people and things I am done with, I don't need those negative aspects and I won't waste my time on them any longer. I have a much more important task at hand, that is, surviving, living, for my children, for my wife, for my family and friends, and for MYSELF.

I want to be old, watching my adult children navigate this crazy life while I drink a beer on the patio, I want to sit around a table with all of my old friends, playing domino's and talking s**t. I am going to get busy living, get busy surviving. It's what old motocrosser's do. That sport gave me identity, it gave me toughness, it gave me survival skills. And then the sport of running, after that, added to all of those skills. I am prepared, I am ready, and I fight to the end of it all. Get ready world, I am in the biggest marathon ever.

alice124's picture
alice124
Posts: 881
Joined: Mar 2012

Terrific attitude. While I haven't experienced cancer (am caregiver to one putt, John), we have had many conversations on the cancer diagnosis. I thoroughly believe that for many it's a wakeup call to fix what's wrong in their lives. And changing negatives to positives spawns more positives which is a valuable tool in your fight. That's a long way of saying, spot on.

icemantoo's picture
icemantoo
Posts: 1658
Joined: Jan 2010

It is wonderful that some of the newbies are ready to address at this ealy stage where they are in life. Some like myself took much longer. Everybody has their own pace and their own issues. There are many questions we face ahead to which there are no absolutes and no simple right and wrong answer. We can learn from each other and our doctors, but we should never rely on just one person's opinion as to how we go forward on our journey. The help we give to our peers is much more effective when it is our collective opinion rather than any of our individual suggestions. Hopefully those reading our posts can benefit on issues and learn from others both on issues where there seems to be a consensous and on issues that we have heathy differences and disagreements with each other on these posts.

Having said all this it is only 5 days to garym's Friday funnies.

Icemantoo

therapture
Posts: 25
Joined: Dec 2012

At 42yrs young, I feel that I have alot of things left to do in my life. Questions about job, insurance, etc., are all creeping in. I have faced a test of my convictions/belief system, and I think I did well. I don't believe in fate, but I believe that all the other "bad" things in my life have prepared me for this fight. I am taking nothing for granted, even though my prognosis is very good right now. Who knows though, what we will find in 6 months.

It's a weird thought process, to look at what lies ahead, and realize that probably, the greater portion of my life is behind me, that the remaining time is most likely going to be much shorter than the time I have been here, not even counting a cancer, just from the standpoint of age alone. I feel the need to make my time left more valuable, more complete, to get some things done while I can.

I love how I have lived my life thus far. No regrets, ever.

garym's picture
garym
Posts: 1651
Joined: Nov 2009

A father has three daughters that are all getting married on the same day. He asks his oldest daughter, ''Who do you wish to marry? She says, ''Father, I wish to marry the man with three dragons on his chest.'' He walks over to his second daughter and asks her the same question. She replies, ''Father, I wish to marry the man with two dragons on his chest.'' He then goes to his youngest daughter and asks her the same thing: ''Who do you wish to marry?'' She replies, ''I wish to marry the man with one draggin' on the floor!''

LISAinTN's picture
LISAinTN
Posts: 143
Joined: Aug 2011

Gary! Do we need to push the "report as offensive" link on you? LOL J/K!!

adman's picture
adman
Posts: 268
Joined: Jul 2012

Is there a punchline for having (6) daughters :)

garym's picture
garym
Posts: 1651
Joined: Nov 2009

My Grandfather had 4 girls and no boys (he also had 4 grand daughters before his first grandson, me, was born). When asked about not having a boy he would answer "Are ya kiddin' me? With four girls, it wasn't long before we had more effing boys hanging around than we ever wanted!"

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