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laserlight's picture
laserlight
Posts: 165
Joined: May 2012

Over the last months I have enjoyed and learned from this site. The inputs from the active members have been great and have helped a lot in my journey. Prostate Cancer is a Mans illiness and we as Men need to addresse and take care of it. Mike, Ralph, Kongo and the other's thank you for information. This has helped me a lot. I for the most part am moving on. I enjoy the the input, but when it becomes a venue for attack or just dogging a person it needs to stop. I have posted honest input. I do think that this needs to be respected. The concept of always trying to get the last word in defeats this whole process. In my opinion I think that the MEN on this site need to be respected. Prostate Cancer is a major kick in the gut. I consider all Men with Prostate Cancer to be Brothers and Veterans. November is comming up and it is PC awareness month, I encourage all of the Men out there to grow Beards and Lip hair in support of this, I have already started on mine.

In closing, MRSPJD I am at a loss trying to understand where you are comming from, but I wish you the best of luck in your journey.

All of the Men on this site keep up the fight.

I am going away and am shutting down. I came to this site trying to connect, but am tired and need to reset.

Thank You, Kurt

Celticroots2
Posts: 43
Joined: Mar 2012

Hi Kurt. I am sorry that you are leaving us, you will be missed. I can also appreciate where you are coming from. I wholeheartedly support you in your statement that this is a mans disease. It is devastating to men and their manhood. I have supported my husband throughtout his journey and will continue to do so. I will fight for him every step of the way in any way that I can. All men with spouses, family and friends should be supporting you in your journey and there should be NO abuse of any kind while you are all fighting this terrible disease. I wish you well and keep fighting!!

mrspjd
Posts: 693
Joined: Apr 2010

Good luck on your journey as well, laserlight.

ralph.townsend1's picture
ralph.townsend1
Posts: 352
Joined: Feb 2012

Hey, the things you bring to this site is way more than I could ever dream. Sometimes I don't understand you, but it's because you are so knowledge able with PC. Sent I have many deceases, so PC not at the fore front of problems sometimes???

I look at you having a very soft heart, in that you really care about your husband and the best battle against this Monster for him.

Love your input!

God bless you and yours

mrspjd
Posts: 693
Joined: Apr 2010

Thanks, Ralph. 

Where I'm coming from is really quite simple to understand:  In one way or another, we are all in this battle against PCa together--men and women, those with cancer and those without, some fighting on the front lines, others providing backup and support.  There is strength in numbers. 

Tolerance trumps hate and indifference.  

All the very best to you and yours.

mrs pjd
Wife of an amazing wonderful man who is a T3 stage PCa survivor and also a US Navy vet

Swingshiftworker
Posts: 634
Joined: Mar 2010

Hey, Kurt:

I'm not exactly sure what incident(s) prompted this post but, from what I can infer, I've had the same reaction as you to what's been going on and completely concur with your opinion.

I too have thought about leaving the forum because of the the apparent lack of civility and respect demonstrated by some here but decided to stay despite these problems.

I predicted that some men might leave the forum because of what has been happening and regret that this has been born out by your departure.

I wish you well and hope to see you back some time in the future.

Good luck!

laserlight's picture
laserlight
Posts: 165
Joined: May 2012

This morning I checked the forum and my messages. I thank all of you that have given me input on this. I have the deepest respect for all of us prostate cancer surviors and patients. I have been on other sites and have been amazed at the amount of respect amoung members.

The Ladies on these other sites show a GREAT AMOUNT of respect to the other members. I like this site and it has been good for me. I have been provided with some good information that has helped me.

I do think that the conduct on this site needs to be held in check at times. I fully understand the effects of this illiness, the cancer, surgery, drugs, radiation, and care is very hard and difficult. It takes a lot out of anybody.

In my case the surgery kicked my butt big time. This is not a buckett list item by any means. The final path report came back with PNI present, so in my research this indicates that it is still there.

I find that sites like this help to at times clear the mind.

By keeping the conduct in check a lot of good use full information can be passed to other's that need it.

In my contacts Ira, made some very good comments and I value these.

It is my request that we all try and keep the conduct above board. I noticed that some of the posts are starting to go bad again.

I have a facebook page, my daughters wanted me to do it search on my name of Knoblock Kurt. I have started to grow beard for November prostate cancer awarness.

In closing I know that not everybody will agree, but all I am trying to do is keep fighting this and helping as much as possible. I will post when I feel I have something.

But I for one donot want to get into a online head banging session, I have enough problems with cancer, PTSD, the effects of Agent Orange.

The Men are all my Brothers and Veterans

With all due respect Kurt

Samsungtech1
Posts: 350
Joined: Jan 2011

Bro,
If my wife got a dollar for everytime it kicked in she would be a millionaire. She has a house, and I have a house and now we get on pretty good. Zero to 100 is really fast. As I get older I think it should slow down, but it still rules.
Fighting cancer is enough for most people. When you have to worry about losing it with people helping you, or others, it is scary. I am hoping I get senile and forget PTSD.
I wish you well with your journey. Life is a great journey and I am happy I am still here to experience it.

Mike

hunter49
Posts: 201
Joined: Oct 2011

Good luck to you . I enjoyed your posts. They were always informative and presented a cojent thought on this beast. One question, why do you think the PNI means it is still there? I actually had the pleasure to meet and discuss this with Dr. Partin at Hopkins and he felt there is no clear data to suggest PNI is an issue on organ confined disease. If you have any other sources please let me know as I would like to read on it as I was PNI as well.

laserlight's picture
laserlight
Posts: 165
Joined: May 2012

Hunter, the final surgery path report on my end indicated Pre Nural Invasion, from what I understand the cancer has got into the nerve's. This is my limited understanding, I am doing research all of the time on PC. I do know that there is disagreaments between doctors when it comes to treating cancer. The Path report indicated clean margins and no extensions, but my biopsy at the time came back with large amount of cancer thruout the whole prostate. My wife found a book it is called

" THE PROSTATE BOOK an owners manual " she picked it up at a sale, good book with lots of very good information. I have also been all over the internet researching this. My cancer was on the edge of escaping, I was at stage T2C and it was moving fast. My doctor explianed to me on the last visit that he could not guarantee a cure. I am in post surgery AS. I have another doctor apointment comming up next week with the VA this time, so I will see what is happening, they are supppose to give me complete screening.

If you have a facebook account there is a lot of information on Prostate Cancer and large number of links. I was against this at first, but my daughters encouraged me to do it.

Also my psa numbers are starting to move, they are still considered to be in the undetectable range, but they are moving up, so This puts me on edge, when the prostate is removed according to the doctor there should be no psa levels. My psa level at time of diagnosis was only a 2.25. And this is well under the radar screen.

I will continue to post, I like this site, there are good people here, I just donot want to get pulled into the background noise.

PC is bad, I strongly encourage every man to get the TEST, it just might save your life.

There is another site that my GP pointed me to it called PUB MED, google will take you there.

I hope this helps, I am still learning about this BEAST. In my current job I work on a lot of very complex semiconductor processing equipment, so I am always researching and trying to understand problems down to the root cause, All of my training now is starting to pay off with prostate cancer.

Kurt

Swingshiftworker
Posts: 634
Joined: Mar 2010

Hey, Kurt:

I'm glad to hear that you've changed your mind and have decided to continue to post here.

The problem w/Net forums is the anonymity and how easy it is to post caustic, rude and insensitive remarks that one would never "say" to another person face-to-face.

The key on this and any other forum is to not let bad behavior directed towards you (or others) get under your skin. There is always the impulse to strike back and/or defend yourself from such attacks but they are generally unproductive because the offender usually doesn't "get it" and a counter attack often leads to escalation (a "flame" war) which just makes matters worse.

If I feel that someone is seriously misbehaving, I operate on a "one final response" rule. I'll call that person on his or her behavior -- laying out as logically and unemotionally as possible -- all of the things that I think the person is doing that is inappropriate and ask for a change.

If the person still doesn't "get it" and continues misbehaving, I just make the decision to IGNORE him (or her) and choose not read and/or respond to any to ANY further posts he (or she) may leave.

An often quoted statement is:

“The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference."

Indifference is a form of censure that I've already incorporated here towards one who has previously offended me and who apparently just doesn't get it.

I'm looking forward to reading your future posts and I suggest that this would be the best way to proceed (with regard to the person who almost made you quit the forum) from here on out.

Best wishes & good luck!

laserlight's picture
laserlight
Posts: 165
Joined: May 2012

Swing, thanks for the information very good input. Prostate cancer is bad news and I have found that you have to stay on top of it all of the time. I know that everyone else on this site for the most part is also doing this. I am always looking into information on this. My wife does a lot of online nutrition and cancer research, she keeps me updated. We as MEN have to get the word out on this and keep fighting this monster.

ralph.townsend1's picture
ralph.townsend1
Posts: 352
Joined: Feb 2012

H*ll Kurt, you are needed on this cancer site for your knowledge and the support you have give me. I laugh and injoy the comment's you bring. I have been too sick sometime to join in with discussion and my brain is lossing it. Yes this is a MAN's dicease, but I think as bad as it is for me, I can tell how much it's effecting my wife, my children and Family! You are part of my family Kurt and monster that live in me, as same the monster that lives in you! Everybody at this site is important, MEN or WOMEN that give a different view to see both side and their knowledge.

I don't have very few Vietnam vet's friend that I can talk about PC, PTSD, and Agent Orange. It's you and Mike that are my connection to that world that is a dark cloud in my life.

Good luck, Ralph

God Bless

laserlight's picture
laserlight
Posts: 165
Joined: May 2012

Ralph, I am here I will not go anywhere. You are all my Brothers. I fully understand this being a family issue, it has effected mine in a big way. My wife has been a close suporter on this. She has got me to change my diet and that was hard, my daughters are always checking on me and giving input. But I really the Mans side of things and this site provides that.

By the way I am planning on retireing in June, my son wants to do about a 30 state road trip, we are planning, Vegas, Reno, down thur Texas, over to New oreleans, up to Alantic city thur the east coast and then back thur Chicago to visit family. My wife has given me permission. Swing had some very good advice as have others. I like this site there are good people here.

PC, PTSD, Agent Orange what a mix, some days it is hard trying to figure out which item is in the fore front. Keep us posted

Kurt

ralph.townsend1's picture
ralph.townsend1
Posts: 352
Joined: Feb 2012

If your pasting thru Dallas, give me call. I would love to buy you a dinner or lunch and hang out. Of course we won't talk about PC, agent orange, and Vietnam... NOT!

hunter49
Posts: 201
Joined: Oct 2011

PNI refers to cancer within the nerves of the prostate. It is most significant with T# and T4 tumors. I am not sure how they would know if you have PNI in the nerves that are responsible for erection if you have nerve sparing surgery. As for your PSA movement dont go crazy . I had 3 PSA tests done in a week as an experiment at 3 differnt labs. the results were .01, .025 and .02. By chance I had one done 6 weeks later and that was .04. Like all the doctors say unless it goes to .1 in a year relax. You get variations all the time. Thanks for the reply and hope this helps u. When did u have surgery? I had mine 11/10/11. T2c interesting my biopsy only found it in one section on one lobe but 95%. Final path had 1 tumorggrewing inward.

Kongo's picture
Kongo
Posts: 1167
Joined: Mar 2010

Laser, I too am glad you've had a change of heart. Your earlier post really bothered me. I was saddened to see someone driven away by the tone of discourse that occasionally arises on this forum.

There are those whom we simply won't agree with, and others who have agendas we may not understand or appreciate but at the end of the day, those of us suffering from this disease need to stick together.

All the best,

K

laserlight's picture
laserlight
Posts: 165
Joined: May 2012

we do need to stick toghter, I value all input and respect it. I operate on a simple concept of respect. This disease is bad. I came to this site looking to connect up with people that are also PC surviors. I spent about a year in isolation dealing with this by myself, but that does not work. The Ladies that visit this site do bring a wisdom that men are not able to provide at times and that is welcomed, I for the most part try and input from my own personal experience with PC, and I am still learning. I understand that there will always be be the 1 percent who has problems and can cause issues, I just donot want to be part of that.

I am tired and trying to fight this monster. I am not going away I am here to support as much as possible. Thank You for the input

Kurt

Samsungtech1
Posts: 350
Joined: Jan 2011

Kurt,
I live in Hampton VA on the Chesapeake Bay. If you are crazy enough to come here in summer it works for me. I have an extra bedroom if that helps. Not sure where you are coming from, but the bugs here are flashier than the bugs in Nam. Let me know when you are coming through and let us see if I am here. Also let me know when you are going through Nags Head. Might be able to help you with a week down there.

Mike

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