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Looking for support

katn803
Posts: 1
Joined: Sep 2012

My mom was just diagnosed with breast cancer. This is very new for all of us considering there is no family history of breast cancer. I do not know what is going to happen. She is facing having to remove both breasts. She goes to the surgeon tomorrow to discuss her options. I am just looking for support from people who have gone through this. I am truly at a loss right now and do not know what to do. I think it would be good to meet some people that have gone through this already. I am also here to support anyone who needs it. Like I said, this is very new to me, but I do understand how it is to feel at a loss.

hope4thebest's picture
hope4thebest
Posts: 108
Joined: Aug 2012

I'm sorry to hear about your mom's diagnosis. It is scary to face the unknown, but together you can move forward. Technology today allows for such excellent quality care. There are so many women out there, after some time passes, maybe she will connect with a support group of her peers. I hooked up with cancercare, and they called me for some therapy because I live so far away from everyone. Along with that foundation, there is also the American Cancer Society which can provide you with many other programs for assistance and support. I am 42, and got my diagnosis last year. Cancer does not care how old you are, if you have a family history of the disease or not... Best advice I got at the beginning was not to waste energy trying to figure out what went wrong, but to move forward and make things right. It was my choice to do a double mastectomy, but every woman is different. Your mom will probably make up her own mind, but if she seeks your advice, then give it. Otherwise, respect her decision. She is lucky to have you!
Aloha,
annie

carkris's picture
carkris
Posts: 4523
Joined: Aug 2009

When i got diagnosed at 34 I had no history either. let us know what you need and what questions you have and how we can help

ladyg's picture
ladyg
Posts: 1577
Joined: Apr 2010

for you. I am sorry that your Mom is going through this. Ask any questions you may have and you will get answers from those who have been there. You and your Mom just need to take one step at a time.

Hugs,
Georgia

ESDC
Posts: 43
Joined: Sep 2012

I am so sorry to hear about your Mom. As a fighter of this disease I can tell you that somehow you will both find the strenght to cope with this. At the start the surgery seems horrific, barbaric even, and then with a little time acceptance takes over and the fighting spirit kicks in.

You may feel helpless, useless and at a loss as what to do but just being there, showing your love and listening really is a huge thing. Having people care and show their love is what helps us all through this.

Love to you and your family

XXXX

Megan M's picture
Megan M
Posts: 3001
Joined: Dec 2009

We are here to support you and your Mom however we can. Just ask anything and we will answer the best that we can.

Hugs, Megan

salls41's picture
salls41
Posts: 340
Joined: Apr 2012

I have a daughter who is 28 and she is my only daughter (I have 3 sons) and so I know how you are feeling. I was dx in Nov 2011 - I actually knew about my lump during her wedding but did not tell her because I knew how she would worry! Daughters do that, I had no history of breast cancer in my family. This was a total shock to all of us. I knew right away that I wanted both of my breasts removed, and I knew I would fight as hard as I could to do what needed to be done so I can be here fro my family for many years to come. You are a great daughter coming here to find support. Please be careful in what you read and know that everyone of us is different, and not all of us have had horrible side effects, reoccurring cancer, or metastic cancer that spread somewhere else. But alot of us have... so you will find answers to probably all of your questions, but you will also read things that may scare the crap out out of you! Remember that your Mom is a unique person with a similar cancer.
As far as what you can do to help mom right now, understand that she will have some really down days ahead. My daughter stopped at my house every night on her way home just to give me a hug. I never wanted her to give me pity eyes and she never did. She brought me happy balloons, candy, dinner when I could eat, milkshakes when I couldn't. And most of all, she let me hug her and she was my little girl and let me hold her when I needed to. I know you want to do anything you can to help your mom right now. Listen to her for now and as her treatment plan is laid out, come here and ask what you can do if anything to help her through. Again, you are already doing more than you know, just by caring enough to come here. Prayers and positive thoughts for you and your mom.

disneyfan2008
Posts: 5332
Joined: Oct 2010

you have come to the right place...

Denise

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