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I need as much advice as possible!!!!

gwj7
Posts: 20
Joined: Jul 2012

My mom recently has been diagnosed with colon cancer and she's planning on getting treatment at Sloan Kettering in NYC. We live in NJ and there is a NJ sloan facility but apparently they were talking about waiting until mid Septemeber to start chemo and that they were understaffed or something.It made my mom very unsure with her decision with Sloan because she thought the person she spoke to on the phone was incompetent or something and this is cancer. Apparently some lymph nodes were swollen on a scan and she is freaking out about it metastasizing to her brain or something if she doesn't have immediate treatment.

My dad is at work but I texted him to call Sloan as soon as possible so we can work everything out. In the mean time my 56 year old mom is FREAKING OUT. I think she is having a panic attack. It's been about two weeks since diagnoses and the first week was so horrible but I thought everyone's moral improved and things almost went back to normal.

I woke up today and I hate seeing my mom like this. I was trying to calm her down while she was in tears rambling on and sometimes I had no idea what she was talking about. She is freaking out about everyone supporting her. Like my uncle sent her an ipad (thinking it would be useful during chemo or something) and her friend told her to come over swimming whenever she wanted. She takes these as people being nice to her because she is dying.
I am 18 years old and I shouldn't see my mom like this. I feel like I need to control everything and I can't right now. I am supposed to go to college as a freshman in a month but hoooooooooooooooooooooow can I do that? I tried calming my mom down by saying that I am a huge hypocondriac and anxiety ridden person (she knows this is so true) and that I am not freaking out about it so she shouldn't. I told her stressing over uncertainty is pointless and that it is completely normal to be freaking out since your recent diagnoses with cancer, but people go through this and everything will be okay. I repeatedly told her that she is going to overcome this and live and it will all be good. Is this a bad thing?

How do I calm her down? I think her mind is racing because she wants the cancer OUT of her body and she feels kind of unsure with Sloan. I told her to call one of her friends and talk about unrelated things because why bother worrying???????? She is currently on the phone and has stopped crying.

I am rambling on but please give an 18 year old son advice on what he should tell his mother who is panicking about the diagnosis. I told her about this site but she is scared to come on here and face the reality of what she will be going through.

peanutcat's picture
peanutcat
Posts: 104
Joined: Mar 2011

Tell her people go through this all the time. I know a carpenter that HAD!!!! colon cancer and know he is Cancer fre. I saw him Sat. He was diagnosed last August and he already got his port out which to me and him means he is cancer free. I was diagnosed with Breast Cancer last Feb went thrugh chemo and radiation now I'm cancer free. I will be getting my port out in a few weeks. You should call the person who told your mom she had to wait for chemo in Sept and tell them NO give it to her NOW.. go over there head if you have to. Tell them she won't stop crying they will listen to you your her son (family). Let me know how you do good luck. I'll be praying for her.

John23
Posts: 1832
Joined: Jan 2007

Re:
"Tell her people go through this all the time. I know a carpenter
that HAD!!!! colon cancer and know he is Cancer fre. I saw him
Sat. He was diagnosed last August and he already got his port out
which to me and him means he is cancer free."

Egads, but I truly hate reading this kind of stuff!

A cancer cell usually takes two or more years to even be identified
as a cancer cell using the usual indicators. Someone diagnosed
in August is suddenly considered "cancer free"? As if they have
been cured?

This type of optimism is damaging to every cancer victim, since
it generates the idea that if one's signs of cancer returns a month
or a year later, then they are doomed; that cancer should have been
eradicated within weeks of diagnosis if the treatments have worked.

Most of us here have had one scare after another, getting treatments
and finding that cancer was not eradicated as hoped for.

If getting rid of cancer was that fast and easy, this forum would
be of no use at all to anyone.

Cancer is considered by the entire medical society as being
a terminal disease. For some, it may be controllable and treated
similar to a chronic disease, but there is no known cure to date.

Please don't play down the seriousness of cancer.

Best wishes for you for better health,

John

peanutcat's picture
peanutcat
Posts: 104
Joined: Mar 2011

What makes you think the doctor is wrong about me being cancer fre from Breast Cancer? I'm really concrened now. Were you tol that and it came back or by reading about it?

Cathy

John23
Posts: 1832
Joined: Jan 2007

Re:
"What makes you think the doctor is wrong about me being cancer fre from Breast Cancer?"

That is not what I said or implied, Cathy. Please re-read what I did say?

Minimizing the seriousness of cancer does not solve anyone's problem,
it makes the problem of a recurrence worse for those it happens to.

No-one goes from stage four to cancer-free overnight, unless there was
a mistake in diagnosis to begin with. All stages are dangerous, not just
"stage four". I have had too many friends with stage one and two, that
have died within two years of diagnosis.

It's great to have hope, and great to strive for survival, but downplaying
cancer's seriousness is not the way to provide reassurance.

My best wishes to you for good health,

John

peanutcat's picture
peanutcat
Posts: 104
Joined: Mar 2011

Sorry,everyone makes mistakes.

janderson1964's picture
janderson1964
Posts: 1577
Joined: Oct 2011

You need to have hope and be positive but i also have to agree with John. I went 2 years after my first surgeries and treats then had a recurrence. Had surgery and treatment again then went over 4 years before having my second recurrence. Had surgery and treatment again. I am now done with treatment. Last 2 scans were clean and i am about to have my port taken out again. Lets see how long i last this time. I am hopeful that it wont come back this time but the reality of it is that most likely it will.

BTW the industry standard and i do mean industry is you have to have clean scans for 5 years to be "considered cured". I think that is wrong. It should be 10 years. I have heard about plenty of people who have recurred well after the 5 year mark. Some were initially diagnosed stage 2.

The fact of the matter is the oncologist are over worked in a very depressing industry or field and really dont know. So much of it is guess work.

John23
Posts: 1832
Joined: Jan 2007

After my colon cancer resection in 2006, they said that the tumor had probably
taken 7-8 years to grow as large as it was. For 7-8 years, I had no signs
of any serious illness, much less "cancer"; I didn't worry about what I didn't
know about...... None of us did!

Now, years after diagnosis, and even having been "cancer free"since 2006,
the fear of recurrence is still alive; that fear never really "goes away".

But we can and should live life as fully as we had prior to diagnosis.
We didn't know what was lurking within us prior to our diagnosis,
yet it didn't stop us from living life, so why should it stop us now?

Cancer may be considered a terminal disease, but let's face it, life
itself is terminal; it does not go on forever.

Do we stop living life because we are afraid that our life may end
un-expectantly on a highway, or in a diner?

Recurrences can occur at any time. Five or ten, or 20 years
of "clean reports" really doesn't matter, what really matters, is how
much we've decided to live in spite of it all.

Keep your eyes on the horizon, not at the grave!

Best hopes to all,

John

janderson1964's picture
janderson1964
Posts: 1577
Joined: Oct 2011

Thats a very good point john. My first oncologist told it had been growing in me for a absolute minimum of 5 years before i was diagnosed. I had forgotten about that. I agree with what you are saying about living life. I try to do the same. In fact i started a business 3 years ago after my first recurrence. Every big life decision i make does give me more pause before i make it now.

Psalm37bl's picture
Psalm37bl
Posts: 25
Joined: Jul 2012

LOVE THIS POST!

mysweetgrace
Posts: 3
Joined: Aug 2012

I'm sorry your family is facing this tough situation.

It will take time to process everything - it is very scary in the beginning. My best advice to you is to support your Mom as much as you can and give her a little time to let the reality of the situation soak in. Just be there for her as much as you can.

My Dad has colon cancer as well and is in treatment now. I'm trying to take care of the "business side" of things (making appointments, filling out paperwork, making phonecalls, etc.). This is something you or someone in your family can do so that she can just focus on feeling better and taking care of herself. Hopefully, with time, she will begin to get a fighting attitude about this.

Hopefully things will begin to fall into place and she can start treatment soon.

Can you give more details about her diagnosis?

abrub's picture
abrub
Posts: 1531
Joined: Mar 2010

First, those first few weeks after a cancer diagnosis are insane. Your mind never slows down, and despite the fact that there have been enormous strides in cancer treatment, the initial assumption is "I've got cancer, I'm going to die."

I'm 5 years out from a Stage 4 diagnosis and doing great. I've been very contented with my care at Sloan Kettering - as a dedicated facility, the staff is particularly patient with all of our fears and concerns.

I understand your mother's feelings - I was 55 when I was diagnosed, and my world blew up (as did the world of my husband and children.)

Yes, you want the cancer out of your body as fast as possible, but it took a while to grow. A few weeks until the start of chemo shouldn't make a difference.

Perhaps your mom can start chemo sooner at the main campus, and then continue at the NJ satellite. It's worth asking about.

Does your mom need to talk to someone who's been there, done that? You can send me a private message with her phone number, and I'll give her a call.

As for you, please go on to college, and continue living your life. You'll be there for your mom. She has a fine son in you.

Alice

gwj7
Posts: 20
Joined: Jul 2012

Thank you so much!!! I hope to eventually get my mom
onto this site. I was initially in panic mode as well but this site has really calmed me down and made me realize cancer is bad, but you can get past it! The problem right now is that I don't know if my mom is really accepting reality and how she has cancer. She obviously doesn't want to accept something like this. We don't know her sage yet since we are only two weeks after diagnosis but apparently some lymph nodes are swollen on a scan. I don't know.... I am hoping for the best!!!!

I also have been telling her about this site and asking her if she wants me to show her success stories with people having worst case scenario (like stage IV). She says she doesn't want to see anything here because I don't think she wants to face reality. I also don't think she wants to truly know what the next couple months will be like. I don't know...... Like right now she took a pill (I guess for anxiety) that her doctor prescribed to her last week.

I hope that tomorrow is a better day. I just feel like ignoring it completely like what my mom wants to do is not the best thing. I certainly don't think it should be the only topic of discussion but I want my mom to know that people live with this and beat it. Any more advice oh **** appreciated!!!!!!! Thanks everyone

abrub's picture
abrub
Posts: 1531
Joined: Mar 2010

Try to talk about "normal" things with your mom, too. Cancer does not have to occupy everyone's every waking moment. She needs to know that she will continue to live, even with cancer; that she will continue to deal with routine day-to-day stuff.

There is nothing wrong with anti-anxiety meds; the mind goes through incredibly powerful and frightening gyrations when handed this diagnosis. Your mom needs to be able to be afraid, but then to get herself back into living again. At 2 weeks from diagnosis, it's way too soon to expect anything rational. Assure yourself (even tho she won't believe you) that life will settle down, albeit with new concerns. The next year or so will be crazy, but your mom will not be this anxious indefinitely.

Alice

annalexandria's picture
annalexandria
Posts: 2208
Joined: Oct 2011

that should help at least a bit. They are a very useful tool, especially in the early stages of this journey when things are so crazy. We cancer warriors have to use every tool at our disposal, from counseling to medications to diet/exercise/supplements, to get through what will most likely be one of the hardest life experiences we will ever face. But it can be done, and you and your mom will get through this! And speaking as a mother myself, I can guarantee you your mom would almost certainly be very sad if you decided not to go to college because of her illness. I've encouraged my kids to keep living their normal lives as much as they possibly can, and would be crushed if they missed out on a big and exciting experience like college because of me. Keep us posted on how you all are doing, we'll be thinking of you. Ann

Maxiecat's picture
Maxiecat
Posts: 524
Joined: Jul 2012

Just take one day at a time. I am 45 and just found out in june that i have cancer it has been a roqllercoaster ride ever since. I had surgery on june 15th and had to wait till july 23rd to have chemo. I am in the process of finding a specialist ...i learned that my cancer is more rare. You might want to consider having someone in your family manage all the paperwork and appointment if your mom is overwhelmed. Get her to talk about or do other things that will focus her attention on something other than her cancer.

Alex

dmj101's picture
dmj101
Posts: 526
Joined: Nov 2011

Please don't think you have to go to Sloan to get sloan care.. in fact there are many facilities in Jersey that follow the Sloan ways and you get much nicer care and quicker appointment times..
I have never been to sloan but the experiences I have heard really shyied me away from going there..
All my doc are from Sloan.. but in Jersey hospitals now..
Private message me and tell me were you are.. may be able to provide you some more info..
Who wants to schlep into NYC from jersey when you feel horrible 2 hrs in and 2 hrs out and however long you will be there just waiting.. not my idea of getting healthy... and the jersey facility refused to see me for metastic colon cancers.. so be mindful when planning on using sloam. NJ has some of the best cancer care centers in the country and people just don't know about it as they don't get the advertising out as only the bad expereiences are spoken of usually and that is true in all expereciences everwhere.. and I dont' want to let this to be known as it will cause my appointments to get delayed if more patience go these places.. selfish.. I know..

gwj7
Posts: 20
Joined: Jul 2012

We're in central Jersey in somerset county. We initially checked out a local place but my mom's friend who had cancer (not colon though) highly recommended Sloan and we've heard very good things. My parents both said that their NYC initial visit was good and they felt comfortable with it. The only problem was the nj location but I'm not completely sure what happened. My dad is calling later and will try to figure everything out. We only live about an hour from the city so if it came to it I don't think that would be a huge deal or anything.

dmj101's picture
dmj101
Posts: 526
Joined: Nov 2011

you have several options in central jersey..
Robert Wood Johnson is the NJ Cancer Center of the state.. and has great reviews..
I go to St Barnabas and also has great reviews. I too am about 45 minutes from the city with no traffic but when does that ever happen..
I know many who go to Morristown Memorial.

My feeling is just that Sloan in NY is not an easy trip when you feel like crap.. even an hour will feel like 3 and if she is sick or her bowls have to be moved urgenty that trip will be horrible

It is honorable you are dong research for your MOM.. but she will need to make her decision passed on the oncologist she clicks with.
and the Surgeon..

Helen321's picture
Helen321
Posts: 758
Joined: May 2012

My aunt goes to one called Fox Chase in NJ. She loves it there. She went to Sloan for her second opinion. They both said the same thing so she stuck with Fox Chase and is doing very well.

Doc_Hawk's picture
Doc_Hawk
Posts: 685
Joined: Jan 2012

I have a lady friend who lives in Western NJ and she recommended Fox Chase as well as the Cancer Center of America in Phillie. Unfortunately, neither of them takes my insurance.

Of course I live in Utah, but I'd be willing to relocate for her.

marbleotis's picture
marbleotis
Posts: 485
Joined: Mar 2012

Sloan is not your only option. The NY and NJ areas have wonderful cancer centers. The most important thing is your Mom needs to feel comfortable with the center she selects. She also must have a good relationship with her Onc. I have CC stage 3b no mets, only symptom was left side pain front and back. Dx 1/13/12 at colonoscopy, surgery 1/31/12, rest 1 month, port implant 2/28/12, chemo started 3/7/12 and I am currently on chemo #11 of 12. I was born and raised in NY but have lived in NC the last 10 years. We have wonderful medical facilities here, just 10 minutes frm my house.

I remember the NJ to NY traffic and this might cause your Mom undue stress commuting to appointments or chemo treatments if her solution goes that way.

All of us lost our minds when we are first Dx'ed. Let her get that out. But I learned early that you will find someone always has it worse. I felt sorry for myself until a former neighbor was Dx'ed with CC stage 4 with mets at 26 years old. Wow!

Keep talking to you Mom and her doc, find all the good cancer centers in NJ. Sloan is good but not the only option, and telling you that you had to wait because they are understaffed doesn't sit well with me. Information is power - start researching! Keep us updated please we are all pulling for your Mom and family. We have all been where you guys are right now.

gwj7
Posts: 20
Joined: Jul 2012

I have heard from numerous people that Sloan is the best of the best. I also read online that it is number 2 in the country. Hearing different opinions worries me because I am pretty sure my parents wouldn't really do anything if I told them to look into other facilities. After all I am only 18. Sloan was their second opinion too.

gwj7
Posts: 20
Joined: Jul 2012

I have heard from numerous people that Sloan is the best of the best. I also read online that it is number 2 in the country. Hearing different opinions worries me because I am pretty sure my parents wouldn't really do anything if I told them to look into other facilities. After all I am only 18. Sloan was their second opinion too.

Ruffy7
Posts: 126
Joined: Sep 2011

You are a good son for being there for your mom! My 27 year old son was one of the most supportive people when I was dx. He didn't hover (like other family members did) but he did little things that meant so much. All you can do is be there for her - she needs time to process this life changing event and she will but everyone has to do it in their own way and timetable. Just wanted to thank you (and my son) for being there and being the terrific young men that you are! Hang in there, as others have said, the first few weeks/months are hell. Hugs, ruffy

marbleotis's picture
marbleotis
Posts: 485
Joined: Mar 2012

Sloan is great I didn't mean to downplay I just know the traffic situation there, but I'll bet there are locations locally to you in NJ that are Sloan affiliates. My point is to research, research, research. Keep asking the Onc until your parents are happy with their selection. Once your parents feel good about their choice everything else falls into place. Keep posting updates so we can see how your Mom is doing. These boards are great and have been a fantastic source of info and strenth for me.

Helen321's picture
Helen321
Posts: 758
Joined: May 2012

I was just diagnosed in February and am in the exact same position as your mom. If you go back to a post that says "I feel like I'm going insane" in early May, that's my post. My first surgery didn't work and I was panicking. I no longer feel like I'm going insane. The insanity that you go through in the first two weeks is unbearable. It just takes time and you can't stop the insanity, she has to get to a doctor who can reassure her that she is still in the curable phase (and from the sound of it, she is). Also swollen lymph nodes are sometimes just swollen lymph nodes. I would suggest going to Sloan in NYC and calling today because it takes time to get an appt. Have the report ready from the other hospital (they can email it to you, you can then email it to Sloan). They will ask for it and you need it to make an appt. Once she's in, she can request a PET scan (a scan of her whole body). For some reason we all think it goes to our brains, it doesn't. Once she has the PET and realizes her brain is fine and it's just in the one area of her body and perfectly treatable, she will feel much better. Even if she doesn't get her actual treatment at the NYC site, it will help her to calm down and probably get her an "in" with the NJ site or find another cancer center in NJ at that point.

when I first came on here someone on here said to me "cancer is not a death sentence". It really isn't. It's perfectly treatable and often curable. Once you get in to see the doctor, you feel relief and when you start treatment, you feel even better. It's a slow process. You should tell her to talk on the phone a lot today so that she can get it out of her system until your dad gets home to help you. Meanwhile, your dad should make that appt. today with Sloan so she's in sooner than later.

Helen321's picture
Helen321
Posts: 758
Joined: May 2012

PS. I got my first surgery done without chemo at a local hospital and without a second opinion. Always get a second opinion. Now I'm in Sloan and we are doing a different course of treatment with chemo/radiation.

annalexandria's picture
annalexandria
Posts: 2208
Joined: Oct 2011

two of my kids are around your age (one is 17 and the other 20) and I know my cancer diagnosis has been very, very hard on them. Please hang on to the thought that things WILL get better. Your mom is in the one of the very worst parts of the whole process, imo...the first several weeks after diagnosis. I felt like I was trapped in a nightmare. But once your mom gets her treatment plan in place, and gets started on fighting the cancer, she will feel so much better, I guarantee it. Physically, things may get harder, as she deals with the treatment side effects, but emotionally she will start to feel more stable and accepting of her situation. It may be hard to imagine at this point, but most people with cancer do come to grips with the new reality, and are able to live fulfilling lives even while in treatment. And a couple of things that might help your mom in the short-term, at least in my experience, are having her doc prescribe an anti-anxiety medication, and getting someone to talk to who is a professional at this sort of thing. I talked with a social worker connected with my doctor's office, and it really helped. She calmed me down quite a bit. And for the times when the anxiety just got overwhelming (as it will for almost everyone dealing with cancer at some point), medication can be very effective at just taking the edge off of things a little, makes it easier to get through your day in one piece. Finally, I would tell your mom that you've been on this site, and there are lots of people here (including myself) who are living for years, and doing very well, even with cancer. Some here have reached the point where their doctors consider them "cured" so it does happen. Tell your mom from me to have hope, and tell her that we are all rooting for her to do very well in this journey! Many hugs to you both-Ann

mom_2_3's picture
mom_2_3
Posts: 937
Joined: Nov 2008

GWJ7,

I feel compassion for what you are going through. My father was diagnosed with lung cancer when I was 27. While I was much older at that time than you are now, it was difficult to function in my own life when my father was going through treatments and struggles in his own. Look to your mom for cues on how to respond. If your mom is looking to talk with you about her diagnosis, do so. If she wants to discuss other things, do that. You have not yet found out her exact diagnosis so it's quite possible that this next year will just be a year of treatments in her life and she will be fine and live to a ripe old age.

Regarding Sloan, it's an excellent facility. From the surgeons, the oncologists, the nurses and administrative support staff, I have never met anyone that wasn't top-notch. When I was in the middle of my chemo treatments I would check-in to the front desk and the receptionist would always know my name before I gave it. I was amazed that the staff would know my name given the number of patients that are seen in the facility. No lie, there is sometimes a wait but I have never regretted my decision to go to MSK for treatments. It usually takes my an hour from my house to get there. If I have an 11:30 appt I will leave my house at 10 as you need to be there 1/2 hour earlier for bloodwork. Everything there is one-stop shopping so the times I needed an ultrasound, additional bloodwork, CT or mammogram, get chemo treatments or pick up prescriptions, I was able to stay in the same 53rd street building and never go to another location.

I do go to the Basking Ridge location, however, for scans and when I occassionally needed shots or bloodwork outside of treatment days. It is also possible to go to Basking Ridge for metastatic treatment (ie chemotherapy) and I have 2 friends who did just that. One of those actually drives from Long Island all the way to Basking Ridge in order to see his oncologist. That friend is NED (no evidence of disease) more than 7 years from his last treatment and he was a Stage IV patient.

I am also a Stage IV and I have been NED for 3 years and 4 months. If your mom ever wants to talk, please let me know and I would be more than happy to meet her at the Basking Ridge facility or elsewhere for tea/coffee.

All the best to you,
Amy

gwj7
Posts: 20
Joined: Jul 2012

I really feel like my mom needs to talk to someone who has gone through this and I will try asking her about this at an appropriate time. I was just on the computer and saw one of my mom's emails that she had up and despite not wanting to invade her privacy, I read it and she was talking about having two doctors- one for her colon and one for her liver. I am shocked because she never actually told us that there was anything going on with her liver. When I directly asked her this a few days ago she said "the doctors think there is a good chance that my liver might be involved due to everything they've seen". Is having a liver doctor just "in case" or to check it out or does this sound like she has mets to her liver? aaaaaaaah I really can't deal with this. It just keeps getting worse and worse. Does this mean she is definitely stage 4? I don't want to lose my mom. Do you mind sharing which doctors you had at Sloan? I think my mom has Garrett Nash and I don't really know much about him.

abrub's picture
abrub
Posts: 1531
Joined: Mar 2010

My surgeon at MSK is Dr. Paty, but he speaks highly of Dr. Nash. We do talk about lots of things, and I was asking about Dr. Nash for some friends.

Dr. Nash is a surgeon. Your mom will definitely have another dr - she needs a medical oncologist as well. Regarding a liver specialist, they may pull one in if appropriate. Liver mets are common with colorectal cancer, but you'll find lots of people here who have been successfully treated. Chemo before surgery has been shown to be very helpful in reducing the tumor size so that the surgery need not be as extensive.

I originally saw 3 drs: Colorectal surgeon (Dr. Paty); medical oncologist (Dr. Chung - no longer at MSK) and urologic oncologist, Dr. Karim Toujiers, for a spot on my kidney (was benign.)

You are new to all of this; it's normal to be panicking. However, take a deep breath. This is not a quick fix, however that doesn't mean that remission isn't possible. I'm clean now, despite extensive mets.

Doc_Hawk's picture
Doc_Hawk
Posts: 685
Joined: Jan 2012

These first few weeks are going to be the most anxious that your mom will endure. But at this early date it shouldn't make much of a difference on waiting for an appointment. Last year I had to go two months without treatment and my cancer count (CEA) got pretty high. Once treatment started again, the count dropped fast.

Try to distract her with activities that will take her mind off cancer. Two days after my dx, I had company come to visit on a trip we'd been planning for months. The next day we went to the grand opening of a wild animal park in Williams AZ and had an absolute blast. Being with them really helped get my mind off cancer and I just couldn't believe that a couple of days before my GI doc had dropped a huge nuke on my head.

thxmiker's picture
thxmiker
Posts: 1216
Joined: Oct 2010

Fear and Anger are normal. We are all afraid of the unknown. It is OK to cry and be frustrated. Then take all of that emotion and put it towards reading about positive outcomes. Diet in the fight against the Big C is important. Exercise, and mental health are really important also.

Both the care giver and the person with the Big C need to keep a mental balance that feeds each other positive. It is difficult for a care giver to completely understand but compassion is all the patient needs.

Read about the future needs, Baby Wipes, Nuper Canal, toilet paper, etc... will be her future needs. I desired Ginger to calm my stomach. Bananas and gatoraid, at times were my positive calories. Do not read anything before 2007, Cancer treatment has gotten much better since then. Also make sure that the Oncologist is relying on data pre 2007.

Best Always, mike

pete43lost_at_sea's picture
pete43lost_at_sea
Posts: 3915
Joined: Nov 2010

our journeys and treatments all very different.

peace of mind is the number one goal even as of day 1 of diagnosis.

you will get lots of support and suggestions here.

hugs,
pete

ps possibly the best support you could offer is to keep your life together while you get used to the reality of bowel cancer. now if you are interested, and only if, well lets just say effective treatment is open to a very wide interpretation. you can certainly do research and attend consults if your able and into the medicine. you may even become a doctor or a naturopath as a result. for now just smile and rest and a restful sound sleep is the best place to start a healing journey. now google "lef cancer and melatonin" for a taste of what effective medicine can offer in my humble opinion. Health is a real long journey and you got to start somewhere.

http://www.lef.org/magazine/mag2004/jan2004_report_melatonin_01.htm

esk2poo
Posts: 22
Joined: May 2012

First, RWJ runs a support group for patients and family members every other Wednesday. Barbara Hale runs it and you should seek her out to get info on the dates. It is good to talk.

I had my surgery at JFK in Edison, was admitted to RWJ for c-diff after surgery. Had it pre surgery but it came back. Then I had all of my treatments at Princeton medical group. I too am in central Jersey and looked at many options. They are all standard for CC and wient where I realy felt comfortable. Princeton just built that new hospital in Plainsboro and it is beautiful. They updated their cancer treatment facilities and did not lose that small, hometown feeling with the staff. I was hospitalized 5 times during treatments for dehydration and blood clots and actually looked forward to being admitted. I guess I was really screwed up in the head.

I finished my treatments in April and had my first post scans a couple of weeks ago and that was good so far.

You also need to take care of yourself. You will be of no help to mom if you are not ok.

Good luck,
Allen

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