Aug 07, 2012 - 4:43 pm
Has anyone delt with feeling insecure? I'm new to this site and have been in remission from large B cell non-hodgkins lymphoma for one and a half years. I'm doing really well health wise, but seem to have issues emotionally on occasion. I haven't been in support groups and feel that is a mistake.
Most of my emotional problems have surfaced long after treatment. During and after treatment I was pretty much numb with no personality whatsoever. Then I had a full-hysterectomy and few months after that I developed all the menopausal symptoms. I had a really bad time with that but have overcome the menopausal symptoms without hormones, but still seem to have some issues. My husband has been very supportive throughout all of this.
I am an ex smoker that has relapsed on occasion. Smoking is a big issue for me and it was really hard to quit. I use nicotine gum now and seem to be addicted to that now. My husband is a smoker too and has tried to quit and is trying to quit. This has been a source of contention for both of us. I really beat him up for failing-although I fail occasionally too. I've also managed to take his lying about smoking to the next level of what else are you lying about. He is not lying about anything. He is just struggling to quit and so he hides it because he doesn't want to give me an excuse to smoke.
Why am I doing this? He has been wonderful to me. Is this normal behavior for a cancer survivor?