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Oh Crap!

forme's picture
forme
Posts: 1158
Joined: Aug 2010

Hi all my dear sweet friends,

I felt that the title of my post is very appropriate.

I have tried to log on, but of course this site was full of issues. Seems to be my sort of luck lately. Anyway, I'll try to fill you in before the site goes crazy again..

I had a long chat with the Doc this morning. He was able to answer most of my questions. He and the Radiologist agree that the scan images along with all my fairly new symptoms and a belly full of acites lead them to a dx of some type of ovarian cancer. Crap crap crap!!!

As of right now, I am not upset just trying to fully get it.
I have thought that this was what might be going on for a little while now. I had not told anyone what my symptoms were and what I was thinking. You already know that I have just been needing a break from the Doc visits etc. So, between your words of encouragement and my inner voice telling me to wake up, well here I am today with another cancer.
After all the cancer I have had and still have, it just felt better to say nothing and try to believe that everything was a result of the huge amount of stress I have been in. Not denial, just self protection mode. Time to get real again.

Many of you know that the past bunch of years have been extremly stressful for me. I have worked really hard at reducing some of that stress, but a lot just is there.
Caring for my Mom for 5 years till she passed away in Feb. My only brother dying unexpectedly 3 1/2 years ago and the ongoing battle over his Estate. My MIL dying after we moved her out here 1 1/2 years ago, I could go on and on. You get my meaning of stress.

My ongoing cancer concerns and treatments here and in Texas have also worn me down some. Stress is so unhealthy. I will try to stay less stressed, but impossible to be stress free.
I will gather my strength and fight as best I can.

I know that this new journey is one that you are not a part of. I'll stop by the Ovarian boards also. But you are all my friends and my most needed support. So I hope that you will still be able to be there for me as I start down this unknown path. I really need you all right now. Okay I better stop for now, the tears are welling up.

Not much else to say except CRAP CRAP CRAP!!!

I love you all, thank you for always being there for me.
Lisha

jimwins's picture
jimwins
Posts: 2004
Joined: Aug 2011

Hi Lisha,

I've been having problems responding to your post (system issues).
Third attempt here....

We are part of your journey and you know we love you too.
You know we're here for you so don't worry about that.

I'm so sorry you're having to go through all of this. I think you've had
more than enough to deal with over the past few years.

Feel free to email me too (hopefully they'll get the system issues resolved
soon).

Warm and sincere hugs,

Jim

anliperez915's picture
anliperez915
Posts: 748
Joined: Sep 2011

Sorry Lisha,
I'm speechless really don't know what to say, only that I wish you didn't have to deal with all this crap again!!!
I'm wondering why you got ovarian cancer? Is it from your thyroid cancer or the lymphoma? Also did you have any symptoms? How long has it been that you not seen your oncologist? I just cant imagine how something like this can happen! Sorry Lisha don't mean to bombard you with a lot of questions its just that this is really scary what's happening to you! Try to be strong! I will be praying and thinking of you...take care and keep us updated. ((((Hugs)))

Sincerely,
Liz

COBRA666's picture
COBRA666
Posts: 2418
Joined: May 2010

Lisha,
Like everyone else I do not know what to say. I am sure they will have to do some sort of biopsy to be sure. Fingers crossed for that. Its one of those things where I do not know what to say. I can't imagine how you feel. You see what I mean about not knowing what to say. We are here for you all the time. I am thinking of you as I am sure everyone here is doing the same. Pease keep us updated.John

forme's picture
forme
Posts: 1158
Joined: Aug 2010

Hi

I will try to answer what I know.

I have no idea why I have a new cancer, but if I were to guess, I would lean towards a genetic cause. I have a sister who got breast cancer at 40. Maybe I'll learn more down the road.

I did have symptoms. Very vague at first, mostly chalked it up to the stress and sadness I've been going through. Then things started to change for the worse, and I knew that there was a real problem. All in a fairly short amount of time.

There will not be a biopsy, instead I will have major surgery. I am in the process of getting a new/different Onc. This cancer needs a specialist. The first one I called today won't work. I have two other names to try in the morning. Stanford Cancer center has just opened a special Womens Cancer center that deals only with Breast and Gyn cancers. Won't have to deal with the main cancer center. It's across the walkway. Much more intimate and personal.

I still cannot believe that I am really writing this. It feels like I am talking about someone else.
Anyways, I hope that answered a few of your questions.

Thank you for your continued love and support. I am here for you too!

Hugs
Lisha

onlytoday's picture
onlytoday
Posts: 586
Joined: Jun 2010

Lisha,

I am so sorry. I don't know what to say except that I will hold you in my prayers as you wade into this new area. Wow, you must be numb- can't imagine.

Please stay with us - we truly care about you and will do our best to support you during this. Hate that this is happening to you!

Hugs and prayers,
Donna

forme's picture
forme
Posts: 1158
Joined: Aug 2010

Dear Donna

Your kindness is so strong and warm. I know that you are going through some really tough times right now, and you are still there for me. thank you.

I have no intention of leaving you guys, you are my "main" family. Plus there is still the lymphoma.

So weird to talk about cancer and refer to more than one or two or three at a time...

Please get your rest and I hope you will start to feel better soon.

Huge hugs to you
Lisha

allmost60's picture
allmost60
Posts: 3163
Joined: Jul 2010

Hi Lisha,
I am really late posting to you, but I could NOT get on this site for the life of me. The CSN page kept coming up blank and I couldn't even log in...so weird and very frustrating!!!
Anyways...I just want you to know that I am always here for you...anytime! I'm so very sorry this is happening, it's just more than one person should have to handle. There's so many folks right now dealing with new issues...it's heart breaking. My prayers and positive thoughts are with you...just wish there was more we could do for each other when these hard times happen. Kisses and hugs to you sweetie. Love...Sue
(FNHL-2-3A-6/10)

miss maggie
Posts: 929
Joined: Mar 2010

It's a good thing I copied and pasted my post to you. All my thoughts just disappeared
into space.

Dear Sweet Lisha,

As the others stated, I have no words. Why, with all you've been through, now this?
Forgive me, Your news has shaken me so. I find my hands shaking, unable to type so
well.

Now that I have forwarded my feelings. They are so unimportant. I wonder sometimes, why
a good and wonderful person like you has to go through all this. You have been there
for everyone in your family. At the same time, having your issues with your health.
It's just not fair. Cancer is not fair.

Despite everything, I know you won't give up. Stanford is a wonderful cancer center.]
You will be in good hands. I am glad you will be operated on. Getting that monster out
asap.

Please know I will pray everyday for you. All of us have traveled through all your
journey's. We love you so, and will be with you on this journey also.

From my heart I send my blessings. Love Maggie

forme's picture
forme
Posts: 1158
Joined: Aug 2010

Dear Maggie

First, I want to tell you that your feelings are very important. I also have very few words right now.

I did hesitate and gave a lot of though to posting about this new issue. I really have worried about upsetting any of you. Cancer can bring so many emoitions, especially fear. My hope is that in sharing with you and all my dear sweet champions, the added strength and prayers from everyone can only have a helpful and positive effect on my new challenge.

Thank you for your loving support. You have always been a champion.
Lisha

anliperez915's picture
anliperez915
Posts: 748
Joined: Sep 2011

Hi Lisha,
Just stopping by to say that I'm thinking and praying for you! Don't worry about getting us upset, I'm glad you shared your new diagnosis with us. We are here for you! Keep the faith sending you positive thoughts (((HUGS)))

Sincerely,
Liz

miss maggie
Posts: 929
Joined: Mar 2010

Lisha,

Please, never, never have to think about posting a new issue. Now that I think about it,
I am so sorry I added to your worry about how I felt on hearing your news. It is
because you are family. How can I not care?

I read your last post and feel so much better you were given an earlier appointment.
This news removes any doubt that you will be treated by the best.

I am so glad you shared. Now you will have so many prayers and blessings from all
of us.

God Bless. Love Maggie

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