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I'm almost afraid to ask, but...

nickgunboat's picture
nickgunboat
Posts: 37
Joined: Dec 2009

Hey folks....
Some of you know me and my story. Others not, but I've been here for a while and am planning on being here for a loooong time. If all goes well.
Tomorrow I get the results of my latest PET/CT scan. At this point an all clear would put me at 3 years survival, a goal that I will officially mark on July 7th (my surgery date 2009) by heading to the beach with my family and some friends.
I'm a stage three survivor and I realize that I have already beaten some pretty tough odds. I realize how lucky I am. This damn thing is so random and ugly.
I have tried to keep up with everyone, haven't really been commenting too much, but please know that I have been lurking and keeping track. I know and feel sad for those we've lost and welcome the new ones, sadly, to our club.. Sometimes I don't know what to say, so many have lost and suffered much more than me. I'm in awe of you all: caregivers and current fighters, your strength, determination, humor, etc..., I'm simply amazed at how you all cope.
Anyway, if it's not asking too much, send a little good mojo my way tomorrow. We all know what it's like waiting to get the news from these things and it's nice to share this with people who really know that feeling.
Thanks and all the best to you all....

Kirk

T3N1M0 I think
6wks Chemo/Radiation
En Bloc Esophagectomy 7/2009 Dr. Tom DeMeester USC
Neck Dissection 7/2010 Dr. Tom DeMeester USC

NikiMo's picture
NikiMo
Posts: 344
Joined: Jul 2011

Hoping all the best for you Kirk!!

Niki

stephikindred's picture
stephikindred
Posts: 153
Joined: Mar 2012

Good mojo, prayers, and positive thoughts headed your way!
Steph

bingbing2009
Posts: 179
Joined: Feb 2011

Kirk, I'm sending tons of positive mojo your way. I'm sure things will go fine and you'll get wonderul results. I do understand the anxiety. Know that you'll be in my thoughts and prayers. Sending love and hugs your way, as well.

Melinda

DX October 2009: T3N1M0
November and December 2009: chemo (Cisplatin and 5 FU) and radiation
February 2010: Ivor Lewis surgery

BMGky
Posts: 666
Joined: May 2010

Hoping the very best for you. Prayers your way. Let us know. BMGky

Ginny_B's picture
Ginny_B
Posts: 537
Joined: Sep 2011

You are doing so so so well! You will continue to do well. We all command it! Let us know ASAP!
Big big big hugs!

GerryS's picture
GerryS
Posts: 238
Joined: Aug 2010

Be afraid to ask for support. That's how we get thru this. You have my prayers my friend.

Gerry

paul61's picture
paul61
Posts: 1104
Joined: Apr 2010

Kirk,

We all know what scanxiety is like. You would think after a number of clear scans it would get easier, but it never does. There is something about going into the scanner that reminds us that we are in "remission" from an "incurable" disease. May we continue to defy the odds.

I will be sending positive thoughts your way for good news tomorrow.

Best Regards,

Paul Adams
Grand Blanc, Michigan

DX 10/22/2009 T2N1M0 Stage IIB
12/03/2009 Ivor Lewis
2/8 through 6/14/2010 Adjuvant Chemo Cisplatin, Epirubicin, 5 FU
Two year survivor

Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance!

mardigras's picture
mardigras
Posts: 196
Joined: Sep 2011

All the prayers and luck in the world for today Kirk.
Please keep us posted, we are all rooting for you to
be another of our family's lifetime success stories.
Hugs Marci x

Bermudagirl
Posts: 120
Joined: Jun 2012

Kirk,

I'm new here, but want to send you all my best wishes too.

Funny how life can change on a dime. A week ago I was researching river cruises to Europe, this week I am knee deep in EC. My guy, 58 in August, will be undergoing an endoscopic ultrasound tomorrow to stage what we hope is early stage cancer. We have been on pins and needles all week, but hoping to get some answers and start on the path to recovery.

This site has been a godsend, and I have already received such great information from people here.

I too am a member of the "club", was diagnosed with Hodgkins lymphoma in 2002, thankfully 10 years out and fine, but of course that is a whole 'nother type of cancer... EC is nothing to play with. The one thing that I can help Dave with is the emotions of dealing with cancer, I've been through the terror as a patient, and I hope that will make me a better care giver. We are not married, have been together 6 years, so that makes it a little tougher as we live 45 minutes apart.

But again, my very best wishes to you!

Sandy

nickgunboat's picture
nickgunboat
Posts: 37
Joined: Dec 2009

Niki, Steph, Melinda, BMGky, Ginny B, Gerry, Paul, Marci, William and Loretta, Sandy.....

I'm overwhelmed and appreciative of your kind words of encouragement. Scanxiety is a funny way to put it! I'm busy at work and will find out this afternoon, about 4pm eastern and am looking forward to posting a positive report. Again, many thanks for thinking of me, and my wife and kid too, they're the ones that got me this far! You people are the best!

Kirk

sandy1943's picture
sandy1943
Posts: 883
Joined: Jun 2010

Kirk, Looking forward to a great report this afternoon. We all have a little scanxiety unti we get the results.
Praying all is well,
Sandra

sandy1943's picture
sandy1943
Posts: 883
Joined: Jun 2010

Kirk, Looking forward to a great report this afternoon. We all have a little scanxiety unti we get the results.
Praying all is well,
Sandra

captdave's picture
captdave
Posts: 168
Joined: Feb 2012

Kirk, You will be in my thoughts and prayers. Wishing and hoping for the very best result for you. Stay strong and positive.

I'm looking forward to hearing a positive result from you. I know no one will be happier with a good report then your family and you but I will share in your relief and happiness too.

Dave

nickgunboat's picture
nickgunboat
Posts: 37
Joined: Dec 2009

All clear! Thank you all so much for thinking of me and my family. I know how lucky I am to have made it this far, and it's not without the well wishes, good mojo, and prayers of so many caring people like you. As of now, my Oncologist will see me every six months for ct scans. I guess I'm one of the lucky ones, and there's a small bit of survivors guilt that I carry around, but hopefully other stage threes will see this and realize that the beast can be beaten. I'll be keeping tabs on everyone as usual and may pop in with a comment here and there if I think I can help. Thank you thank you thank you. This board and it's members have helped me so much....

Never give up.

Kirk

NikiMo's picture
NikiMo
Posts: 344
Joined: Jul 2011

Go celebrate this victory!! I can only hope and pray my husband can beat the odds too. I love hearing good news :)

Niki

paul61's picture
paul61
Posts: 1104
Joined: Apr 2010

Kirk,

Very happy to hear the good news. Time to take a few moments to be thankful and celebrate!!!
May there be many more clear scans!!!

Best Regards,

Paul Adams
Grand Blanc, Michigan

bingbing2009
Posts: 179
Joined: Feb 2011

Kirk, what wonderful news. Nothing quite like hearing NED, huh? So glad you shared the great news. I do understand the survivor guilt thing--I sometimes struggle with that myself. But of course you really shouldn't. Just be happy and thankful and GO CELEBRATE!!!!

Melinda

DX October 2009: T3N1M0
November and December 2009: chemo (Cisplatin and 5 FU) and radiation
February 2010: Ivor Lewis surgery

Ginny_B's picture
Ginny_B
Posts: 537
Joined: Sep 2011

And may God just keep on blessing you! Big big big hugs! May all your future scans be wonderful!

stephikindred's picture
stephikindred
Posts: 153
Joined: Mar 2012

We are so very happy for you and your family! Thanks for keeping us updated so we can all celebrate this victory together!

Steph

BMGky
Posts: 666
Joined: May 2010

Congratulations! May you continue to have great scans. Keep us updated. BMGky

TerryV's picture
TerryV
Posts: 915
Joined: Jul 2011

I'm very happy for you, Kirk! 3 years is a great landmark and hopefully only the beginning of what is available to you.

With love & hugs,

Terry
wife to Nick

mardigras's picture
mardigras
Posts: 196
Joined: Sep 2011

Great news Kirk.
Have a wonderful six months and long may the clear scans last.
The further away you get from this horrible beast, the better
chance you have.
I couldn't be happier for you.
Hugs and prayers
Marci x

JReed's picture
JReed
Posts: 463
Joined: Nov 2011

Wonderful news Kirk! I'll be thinking of you and your loved ones on July 7th as you put your toes in the sand. I just got on here and saw your post and was reading through the other posts and was so hoping things went well for you and lo and behold! at the end was your great news. I know that you are familiar with the feeling of reading posts like yours and holding your breath until you read their results - I don't think I've ever read a post, had the hold my breath feeling, and find out the good news within a minute or two! You made my day ~ just can't get enough good news from all of you!

Enjoy your summer and give a little shout out to our buddy Eric when you stick your toes in the sand - I haven't made it to a beach yet, but when I do - I will do the same.

Again, congratulations and enjoy your summer!

Judy & Don

hopefulsurvivor49's picture
hopefulsurvivor49
Posts: 32
Joined: Apr 2012

Ho Kirk,

Thank you for posting your story, and for the wonderful news on your scans. I can totally relate to many of the feelings you wrote about. Cancer has made my life surreal. Wishing you continued good health and clean scans!

morley
Posts: 24
Joined: May 2012

Kirk
Here's to good news this afternoon and many more summers on the beach.
Dave

Janet Runge
Posts: 37
Joined: Aug 2011

Good Luck and I will be thinking of you
Charlie has CT scheduled for 6/27 and I am already getting that anxious feeling.
Janet Runge

Bermudagirl
Posts: 120
Joined: Jun 2012

Wonderful news! So happy for you.

AngieD's picture
AngieD
Posts: 504
Joined: Sep 2011

Kirk,
Congratulations! We so love to hear good news. Thanks for sharing.
Angie

Freida
Posts: 191
Joined: Nov 2011

I didn't see your post in time to send good karma your way in advance of your scans, but want to wish you a huge congratulations on the good results. I am so happy for you. and thanks for sharing the good news. It is always so good to hear the positive stories.
Freida

Janet Runge
Posts: 37
Joined: Aug 2011

Charlie scan on wednesday --so scared again.
Please positive thoughts
janet

JReed's picture
JReed
Posts: 463
Joined: Nov 2011

Our prayers for you and Charlie are going up. Please let us know how things go. Don just had his first post op scan last Friday - we now know the true meaning of scanxiety.

Hugs to a sister-in-cause,
Judy

BobHaze's picture
BobHaze
Posts: 157
Joined: Sep 2011

Hi Judy:

Don had his first post-op scan last Friday? Dare I ask how it went? Fingers and toes crossed.

FEC,
Bob
T1aN0M0
Dx 8/3/11
MIE 9/23/11

Freida
Posts: 191
Joined: Nov 2011

More positive vibes coming your way Janet.

I think we were more stressed and anxious about Bill's post chemoradiation (he's not a surgery candidate) scans than we were when we started treatment.

{{{hugs}}}
Freida

anaqvi
Posts: 14
Joined: Jun 2012

Hi Kirk

My all best wishes are with you that you have a healthy life and this beast remain far away from you and from all of us and our loved ones.
Though we all come here with worst disease ad problems but I appreciate the founder of this website, this place really helps and give support.
May every one come with good news of complete cure and healthy life.

Lots of prayers with love and support for all those gather here
Anaqvi

monica_sss
Posts: 57
Joined: Dec 2011

Kirk, I search this site looking for good news, I'm so glad to read yours :) Mom has her first scan in September. I hope we have similar results. Enjoy every minute -- I know you will. Love, life.

nickgunboat's picture
nickgunboat
Posts: 37
Joined: Dec 2009

You all have been such great positive support! I wish the best for you all as you and your loved ones travel this nasty road. I'll be keeping my fingers crossed for clear scans and more good news for everyone......

Kirk

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