Apr 30, 2012 - 11:02 pm
I'm new here and I'm not quite sure how all this works. I guess I'm pretty much just looking for people I can relate with that are in similar situations. I'm 28 and as of April 6, 2012, I found out my 53 year old mother has a stage IV glioblastoma. Being very close to my mother, this has been extremely hard to swallow. Two months ago, my mother left for a typical trip to Ma. to visit her mom (we live in NC). She was perfectly fine when she left. She called me almost nightly while she was there, and about the third week in, she called me all upset because she kept forgetting and losing everything. She had just found out her mother has cancer and related it all to stress, and I agreed at the time. I went to visit her when she got back in town and that's when I realized it was much more than stress. She couldn't remember my name, much less perform her normal daily tasks. Driving was impossible... she got lost going to the grocery store she has been going to for years. I couldn't believe what I was seeing... My mother was falling apart. She knew something wasn't right, and I could see the frustration, but she just couldn't fix it. Every time she touched something, she lost it... her cup of coffee, cell phone, remote... She was a wreck, and I knew I needed to get her to the ER immediately. She's a VA patient, so I drove to the closest VA hospital that was 30 minutes away. When we got there, I explained the symptoms and they agreed to do a CT scan. After several hours of waiting impatiently, they came back with the results stating she had a tumor. They were unable to treat her there due to the lack of a neurosurgeon, and it being a weekend, they sent her home and scheduled her to visit the VA with a neurosurgeon that was two hours away that following Monday. The next day my mom was much worse. I decided to drive her to the closest hospital with a neurosurgeon on staff. They immediately admitted her and scheduled a biopsy. After several days they did the biopsy and confirmed my worst fears. They also said it's inoperable. The VA has decided to let her see doctors outside of the VA and are willing to pay for it, but it's a long process getting everything approved. Sometimes I think they are trying to kill her by making her wait, just so they don't have to pay for her treatment. She goes this week to start her radiation and she will be taking temodar simultaneously. She's still a mess and the dexamethasone is making her mean and moody as all get out. She's had a few violent spells and she's NEVER been the violent type at all. Honestly, I'm not really sure if it's the tumor or the meds. It's not pleasant, nonetheless. She cries daily and she's not the same person at all. Her personality is so different now. This has been incredibly hard on her and me. I've had to quit school to take care of her full time. I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have a husband to take care of me and support me. I can't imagine what other people go through that don't have the option of not working. I never imagined I'd be losing my mom at such a young age. She's my best friend. Most of all, I never imagined I'd have to watch her suffer like this. She's absolutely miserable and there's nothing I or anyone else can do for her. They've given her 6 months to a year... I'm assuming that's what most people with this diagnosis get. I'm terrified to see what the next 6 months to a year holds... I don't know if I can handle watching her get any worse and suffer anymore. It breaks my heart.