Cancer Survivors Network

Hi, my name is Joanna, this is my second post in the last couple of days. I have been reading some of your posts and stories. I am having symptoms of relapse and I am really having a difficult time with it. I was diagnosed in 08 with rare type of Large T Cell Lymphoma. I did very well with treatment. My last treatment was Aug. 14, 2009. At the time I had a job and insurance, and a car. In the last few months my life has taken on new direction. My position was eliminated in April of 2011 and by June 20, 2011 I had a better paying position. I was able to pay for cobra. I went to the company nurse a couple of times not feeling well. I gave her my history, I lost that job Oct 20, 2011 with no reason for my dismissal, they would not give me a reason. Now I am unemployed with no insurance. I could not afford the cobra this time so that is why I have no ins. now. About a week and a half ago retuning from visiting one of the joys of my life, my 5 year old niece, my car started acting up. My transmission is gone, the car was not worth repairing and I sold it fortunately. Now I am looking for another one. In the midst of all of this I had started to become concerned about relapse. In the last month I have begun to itch and I had a cold, now I have swelling on the right side of my neck. I did have a blood test right after the itching began on Jan. 20th to check the LDH level at my request. The level was 166 liver and kidney function good. I am so nervous and have been for quite some time. My friends think I am just stressing and nothing is wrong with me. I don't really know what to do. No car and no insurance. I need prayers for sure, I am a born again believer and I know God is the one who decides our fate, it is still scary. I can't sleep, I went to bed last night or this morning rather at 4:25am and I was awake at 8 am something tossing and turning so I got up and started reading your posts. Please give me any guidance and know that I am prone to panic so be gentle. Thank you. J