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My beautiful wonderful mother died today December 14 of Thyroid Cancer that metastisized to the lungs and bones

teenadee
Posts: 86
Joined: Aug 2011

In Memory of my momma who passed today trying to win a loosing battle with cancer. My mother tried her hardest to hold on. It was 10:00 am and her heartbeat slowed down to 93 and was going lower and lower but I screamed my head off 'mommy please don't die, please don't leave us' and she fought to come back. She suffered so very much my mom, I don't want to write all the details but my god this past year has been horrendous for her. She finally gave up at noon today - I got to see her last breath and hold her hand. She had tears in her eyes even though they were half closed. I love her so much, this is hurting so much, my father is falling apart. I am grateful only that she is in no longer pain and that is it. I want my mommy even though I'm in my 40's I want her back. thank you for listening.

Cynthia Rose's picture
Cynthia Rose
Posts: 35
Joined: Apr 2011

I am so Sorry your Mom Passed away. I am Very close to my Mom, She is my Best Friend.I wish I could give you a hug. Remember How much she Loves you and Happy Memories.And That You Will meet again.She is at Peace now.Bless you, I will pray for you and your family that you can find Peace some how in this difficult time.

teenadee
Posts: 86
Joined: Aug 2011

I am just so devastated and trying to be strong but maybe with time. Right now I am a complete mess. May god watch over all of us. thank you again

jimwins's picture
jimwins
Posts: 2064
Joined: Aug 2011

Hi Teena,

I'm very sorry your mother passed on. I know it's difficult but
as you said, she is no longer in pain/suffering. I hope
peace and comfort will find you during this difficult time.

Big hugs and warm thoughts coming your way....

Jim

Hondo's picture
Hondo
Posts: 5852
Joined: Apr 2009

I know your pain as I too lost my Mother to Colon Cancer years ago, God bless and be with you and your family at this time in your life.

Hondo

Noellesmom
Posts: 1306
Joined: Aug 2010

I'm in my 50's and want my mama back, too, teena.

I am sorry for your loss.

3Mana
Posts: 829
Joined: Aug 2010

So sorry to hear that your mom has passed. I lost my mom in 1989 and still miss her so much.
This is a hard time to lose someone right before christmas too . Please always remember the happy times with her and try to forget how she suffered.
Peace be with you during the holidays! "Carole"

jenlea26
Posts: 1
Joined: Dec 2011

I just feel like there are no words to say but I have heard you and I do not look forward the day I will have to go through with my husband what you have gone through with your mother. my prayers are with you and your family.

teenadee
Posts: 86
Joined: Aug 2011

thank you for your prayers. I wish the best for your family as well and I pray your husband beats this awful disease.

anliperez915's picture
anliperez915
Posts: 756
Joined: Sep 2011

I'm really sorry that your mom passed away Teenadee, my mom passed away two years ago and when I was reading your post it was almost like how my mom passed away too. I miss my mom like crazy and it has been two years already, I think that the pain only lessens but never goes away. I still cry when I think about all the stuff we used to do together or when we used to just sit in her kitchen table drinking coffee and talking I think that's what I miss the most (just talking to her). I hope your pain lessens with time and I wish you the very best in life.

Sincerely,
Liz

teenadee
Posts: 86
Joined: Aug 2011

the pain is unbearable right now but maybe after the funeral it will maybe lessen. I use to wish for her to get better and that wish never came true. I ask her to come to me in my dreams so I know she is ok - I want her to be the one to tell me that she is ok. Did your mom come to you in your dreams in these 2 years? I am sorry for your loss as well. There is nothing like a mother. I am - not even know if there's a better word for sad because it's beyond that.

anliperez915's picture
anliperez915
Posts: 756
Joined: Sep 2011

Hi Teenadee,
Yes my mom does come to me in dreams, I remember the first dream I had of her she told me she was really cold and lonely and she was very sad, she wanted to know why didn't I visit her,(of course you can imagine how I felt when I woke up). And I also remember when she came to me and told me she was leaving and their was so much peace in her, that when I woke up I was sad but I was at peace as well. After that day the pain became less, I still miss her but I'm at peace that she is not suffering anymore. My mom died of the H1N1 flu virus so she was suffering so much, the last two weeks of her life she spent them asleep because the Dr. didn't want her to be suffering and in pain. Now when I dream of my mom I see her as when she was young not at the age that she died 53yrs. old (not even old) . Please take care of yourself and I'm sending you a warm hug.

Sincerely,
Liz

cosmic_me
Posts: 35
Joined: Dec 2011

I am so sorry for your loss. I swear to you I really do understand how you feel right this second. We are living identiacl emotional lifes right now and heres why... I lost my mother to pancreatic cancer on the same day as you lost your mother. My mom died at exactly 1:48 am in the morning. I'm gutted with this loss. I was her care provider and the anguish is overwhelming. Those last few hours were not pretty at all. Her labored breathing was so sad. I didn't scream outloud but inside I was screaming to God almighty to please vow to me she is not in any pain. I feel so much pain right now it's unbearable. Maybe I was meant to see your post and maybe just maybe both our moms met each other and hand in hand they crossed over. Even after dealing with all this horror for months knowing what was to come now that the end has happened I'm still in complete shock that she's gone.

shannonbobannon's picture
shannonbobannon
Posts: 24
Joined: Dec 2011

I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't even begin to imagine what your feeling right now. I'm sure there's no worse feeling in the world than losing a parent. Just remember to keep your head high because I don't think your mom would want her to see you like this. She would want you to remember the good times. Just remember that although she is gone she is still right with you in spirit. She isn't in pain anymore. Your in a lot of pain from this, but just try to keep thinking about the good times, and just keep thinking that she isn't in pain anymore. Try to keep your head up.

Shannon

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