May 30, 2011 - 4:41 pm
Apparently they can.
Hello- to those that don't know me- my husband passed last Tuesday May 24th, with lung cancer and mets to the brain. His family were totally absent during this time even when my daughter came from the UK every month to Texas to support us when they found it unbearable to come from one hour away.
I was *told* they were going ahead with a memorial and I could *go along* if I wished.Not even at the family time mind you- but the *everyone else time*.
My husband and I were together 7 years- they don't even want photos of us traveling the world together-they say they have all they need thanks very much but would I *send over* a b and c for it. We were only married 17 months and I looked after him all but the first three weeks alone up until his lifestyle choice of Hospice at home in early April. I feel airbrushed out and completely lost.
Can you imagine how I feel? Do I not need closure too? They did not ask for a list of his friends or colleagues nor mine.Like the last seven years were of no account. I don't even feel Steve or Lyndsey count in all this. I told them it was like a wedding without a bride or groom! Steve's mother is not well but I visited her on Friday to show his will- she just spat out that people needed to pay her respect. I am wondering where the family respect for me and Steve are. I told her I understood if she needed spiritual support from her friends but to have an alternative memorial seems beyond the pail to me.
People have advised me to go ahead on my own- but it seems so divisive for family to have an event without Steve's or my blessing and me deal with well- what appears to me- people they don't care about- who gave me and Steve all the support they could. Is this D for dysfunctional or what?
Apologies for the long post- but i sooooooooo needed to write this down!