i am new and have been diagonsed for 2 months now. How can i help everyone around me to heal and und

mrsdthompson
mrsdthompson Member Posts: 2
edited May 2011 in Esophageal Cancer #1
I am a 38 year old woman. My husband and my family keep thinking there is hope. I know there is not. How do i help them to let me go. I dont mean to be selffish, but it is best for everyone i think. I am so scared for a second round of chemo beacause i know they say your hair will grow back. But im just plain tired of fighting, tired of looking at my love ones and not being able to help them. I have stage 1 but every time we have an appt, there are more clusters. So after direct radiation and 1 round of chemo they are talking about implants directly to the site of the cancer ( right above my voice box). I was told at my last appt that my liver is not in good shape so now i feel is this thing spreading or what. I have pulled up alot of litature and after 4 different doctors i am ready to try someone new. Can anyone give me any good advice. thanks

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  • Unknown
    Unknown
    #2
    This comment has been removed by the Moderator
  • JimboC
    JimboC Member Posts: 264
    #3
    Please share some
    Please share some information. What stage are you? What's your treatment plan. Personally, I'm stage three and I have days when I think I am going to do fine but, there are also days that are quite the opposite. I am in my 9th week of continuous chemo with the fanny pack. When I walked in the door 8 weeks and some odd days ago, I thought it was going to be a 4 day a week infusion. It's been a tough journey and I've had some challenges along the way. I'm tired also but I have always told my children that nothing worth having is easy so I figure this is my chance to show them.

    There were days early on that I felt the same way you did. I mean, the stats are grim and my family kept telling me everything was going to be alright. I'll be honest, at times, I almost resented it but looking back, that's what family and loved ones are for. We love each other and support each other when we need it most.

    I get my strength from my family and my faith. I was never a hugely religious person but I've found a lot of comfort in the good book during my journey.

    One of my favorite songs (even before I was diagnosed in late February this year) is "If Today Was Your Last Day" by Nickelback. There's one line that always gives me a pause. It goes "What's worth the prize is always worth the fight".

    We're pretty close in age (I'm 42) and I was diagnosed about the same time as you. Please feel free to private message me or reply here if you'd like to talk more. I understand admitting when you're done but it sounds like you're receiving or planning to receive chemo. Even at stage IV, there are treatment options that will help maintain a good quality of life and allow you to enjoy time with your family and loved ones.

    As for being scared... My gosh, I am so damn afraid. I think once you have this diagnosis and start doing the first bit of reading it messes with your mind so so much. With that said, without fear, there is no bravery.

    Godspeed to you in your journey and may peace be with you.
  • dwhite0002
    dwhite0002 Member Posts: 126
    #4
    I would like to know your
    I would like to know your story, too. I am 36 yrs old and am a survivor of 4 1/2 years.
  • mrsdthompson
    mrsdthompson Member Posts: 2
    #5
    unknown said:

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator

    thanks i did put more info
    thanks i did put more info out there. This is all so new to me.

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