Cancer as a wake up call
that anyone of us needed one. Plenty of people manage without
a wake up call.
I am rather thinking of the positive changes you have made in
your life if any. They may be radical or just small changes.
I for one can honestly say, I am so much more aware of each day
that goes by. The sky seems more blue, I notice the birds singing
in the morning. And somehow I feel more connected all in all,
because I realize my time here is limited of course I always "knew".
But now I know life is not a right but rather a gift.
I hope I have not offended anyone, since some sisters are really
having a rough time of it.
Love,
Ayse
Comments
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I don't sweat the smalllynn1950 said:Today is a gift. That's why
Today is a gift. That's why we call it the present. xoxoxox Lynn
I don't sweat the small stuff anymore! I used to obsess over insignificant things, but no longer. If someone flips me the bird while I'm driving, I just smile at them. I used to yell and swear right back at them. Now I realize that it's not important.
Peace,
Dianne0 -
Yes, Ayse, cancer was a wake-up callHippiechick58 said:I don't sweat the small
I don't sweat the small stuff anymore! I used to obsess over insignificant things, but no longer. If someone flips me the bird while I'm driving, I just smile at them. I used to yell and swear right back at them. Now I realize that it's not important.
Peace,
Dianne
Am I glad I got it--Hell no! But, as I've said on here before--with this miserable disease, there have come blessings. I always thought I appreciated my family and true friends--now I cherish them.
I, too, appreciate the gorgeous blue sky, a bird singing, a rabbit in my yard, the beautiful mountains around my neighborhood--just a little bit more now.
Life is sweeter--good times are way more fun and the bad times--well, they don't seem as bad.
I'm not as afraid of things I used to be--I've walked through the fire once, and came out on the other side stronger and hopefully a sweeter person.
Thanks for the post, Ayse. Self-reflection is really good.
Hugs, Renee0 -
I know that I am not offended,
Ayse,
It has been is a wake up call, for me and for everyone close to me, and everyday that I show my puffy little face is a blessing. Cancer sucks as do the meds to try to make us better, but overall, my life is still good and I cherish my time with my family and friends, and still love to have fun! So if I am going to be here for 3 more months or 3 years, I have been given the forewarning and the time to show the people in my life what they mean to me.
So, yes I am blessed and I now take the time to take in everything around me.
Great post Ayse!
~Carol0 -
For me too!camul said:I know that I am not offended,
Ayse,
It has been is a wake up call, for me and for everyone close to me, and everyday that I show my puffy little face is a blessing. Cancer sucks as do the meds to try to make us better, but overall, my life is still good and I cherish my time with my family and friends, and still love to have fun! So if I am going to be here for 3 more months or 3 years, I have been given the forewarning and the time to show the people in my life what they mean to me.
So, yes I am blessed and I now take the time to take in everything around me.
Great post Ayse!
~Carol
I no longer worry about trivial things. Every birthday is a gift.
Roseann0 -
Yep, me too
I used to
Yep, me too I used to hold grudges, get mad, stay mad, yell kick and scream (well not that bad) now I appreciate every part of every day, I look at the little things, and they mean more Great post
~Kari0 -
Oh yes
I was a workaholic. I prided myself in keeping on top of the bills. However, the amount of stress involved in working two jobs and getting a higher education took its toll on me. Stress shortens the telomeres that are connected to your genes. Telomeres are a protective force against the development of cancer. My wake up call was this:
"Don't work your A$$ off. Are you trying to kill yoursef?" I have had stressors other than financial that added to the shortening of my telomeres. I probably should have been dead already but I think having a positive attitude may have conteracted at least part of that stress. Now that I have bc I pay may bills more slowly. I don't think God will let them into heaven to get the money if I haven't paid them up in the next 35 years. I think maybe Satan would let them into hell though. Teee Heeee Heee!0 -
I don't know exactly how to
I don't know exactly how to answer this one, Ayse. I have actually pondered it for years...
In the 18 months before diagnosis, I had already left a bad marriage, I had happily, willingly, lovingly legally arranged for Siobhan to once again come to the safety of my home rather than have her stay in her mom's abusive, unhealthy one. I had been dating Reggie for about a year and we were still in the "new love" phase, I had moved to one of the most beautiful cities in America ( Santa Barbara) and as far as I could tell~life was finally lovely and on track!
Add to that the fact that I have always been rather a Pollyanna..though I usually deny that! I already did love sunsets, reading, the aroma of fresh brewed coffee in the morning, etc,etc. I don't know that I needed to slow down, or appreciate more.
I also never spent any time wondering "why me?" To do that would , in my mind, mean that someone else "deserved" cancer more than I did! I could never think that way, and hope I have avoided that mind-set.
So I don't know~ cancer is just something that happened on my life's road, and I have been dodging pot holes ever since!
Fascinating post sweet lady! Love having my brain challenged! And NO!!! I was not in anyway offended!
Hugs,
Chen♥0 -
I understand completely from where this is coming....chenheart said:I don't know exactly how to
I don't know exactly how to answer this one, Ayse. I have actually pondered it for years...
In the 18 months before diagnosis, I had already left a bad marriage, I had happily, willingly, lovingly legally arranged for Siobhan to once again come to the safety of my home rather than have her stay in her mom's abusive, unhealthy one. I had been dating Reggie for about a year and we were still in the "new love" phase, I had moved to one of the most beautiful cities in America ( Santa Barbara) and as far as I could tell~life was finally lovely and on track!
Add to that the fact that I have always been rather a Pollyanna..though I usually deny that! I already did love sunsets, reading, the aroma of fresh brewed coffee in the morning, etc,etc. I don't know that I needed to slow down, or appreciate more.
I also never spent any time wondering "why me?" To do that would , in my mind, mean that someone else "deserved" cancer more than I did! I could never think that way, and hope I have avoided that mind-set.
So I don't know~ cancer is just something that happened on my life's road, and I have been dodging pot holes ever since!
Fascinating post sweet lady! Love having my brain challenged! And NO!!! I was not in anyway offended!
Hugs,
Chen♥
I have always found pleasure in sunrises, sunsets, birds singing, children laughing, and a nice set of manly gams extending from a kilt. Too, I am less inclined to passively let life go by. I tell the people I love, that I love them, I treat myself when I need it, and I sleep without worrying about what needs to be done. I am extended more grace to myself than before cancer.
Still, on the flip side...I find myself less willing to remain silent with myopic and foolish people. My time is much more valuable to me than before and thusly I have no time for ****, idiots, and fun suckers. Heck, even a few attitudes have changed in the long view.
That's my two cents worth.0 -
Good post!
Oh.... was this a wake up call for me!
I learned so much after my diagnosis. I got closer to God and never felt angry. I thanked him for my life and asked for forgiveness for being selfish and not realizing I had so much (and still have so much) in my life. I learned that most things in life shouldn't be stressed. That life is a gift and should be appreciated for what it is, always. Because there is always someone who suffers more than you do, and needs your support.
And yes, I hear the birds sing. The sky is more beautiful than ever. The news and people's anger in the world hurt me more now, because I see them and I think to myself "WHY" - why do people act this way? Why do we have wars? Weapons? Hate? WHY!?!?!?! Life can be SO AMAZING if we all loved each other so much. If we can just FORGIVE and move on.
I let things go now. I used to dislike people very much (I am an animal LOVER! LOVE ANIMALS!!!). Now I see there are GOOD people out there. Beautiful people who care. I am so grateful for having them.
I also appreciate my family more. I go on facebook just to look at their pictures (my tears are coming out as I am typing). They live in the islands and I am here just with my mom so it's hard not to have them. However, some have already visited to give me support! I love them.
So yes, this dignosis has taught me so many good things. And I pray everyday that I always stay positive no matter what. I have faith in God and know he won't leave us alone.
Thanks for this post. God bless you.0 -
Yes a wake up call for meLoveBabyJesus said:Good post!
Oh.... was this a wake up call for me!
I learned so much after my diagnosis. I got closer to God and never felt angry. I thanked him for my life and asked for forgiveness for being selfish and not realizing I had so much (and still have so much) in my life. I learned that most things in life shouldn't be stressed. That life is a gift and should be appreciated for what it is, always. Because there is always someone who suffers more than you do, and needs your support.
And yes, I hear the birds sing. The sky is more beautiful than ever. The news and people's anger in the world hurt me more now, because I see them and I think to myself "WHY" - why do people act this way? Why do we have wars? Weapons? Hate? WHY!?!?!?! Life can be SO AMAZING if we all loved each other so much. If we can just FORGIVE and move on.
I let things go now. I used to dislike people very much (I am an animal LOVER! LOVE ANIMALS!!!). Now I see there are GOOD people out there. Beautiful people who care. I am so grateful for having them.
I also appreciate my family more. I go on facebook just to look at their pictures (my tears are coming out as I am typing). They live in the islands and I am here just with my mom so it's hard not to have them. However, some have already visited to give me support! I love them.
So yes, this dignosis has taught me so many good things. And I pray everyday that I always stay positive no matter what. I have faith in God and know he won't leave us alone.
Thanks for this post. God bless you.
I pray more now. I prayed in the past but not like I do now.I also pray for others.My list keeps growing and growing.
As my husband and I are riding I look at how beautiful the sky is,how pretty the flowers are. I look at the trees, sunset and the clouds moving.
One thing that meant alot to me was"I asked my husband to change".He was never a very loving person.A giving person but not loving.We both now say I LOVE YOU about 3-4 times a day.It means alot to both of us. We also hug everday. He was a Viet Nam vet and received the Purple Heart so he was die hard and rough around the edges. I needed him to change.
I tolerate people more now because I find them hard to get along with.People are different than those I knew growing up. Not much when it come to manners or respect.Like someone said they love animals. Me and many others used to say we liked animals better than people.It was because of so many crude things people would do and the way they acted. I now accept people the way they are.
Lynn Smith0 -
ChenheartLynn Smith said:Yes a wake up call for me
I pray more now. I prayed in the past but not like I do now.I also pray for others.My list keeps growing and growing.
As my husband and I are riding I look at how beautiful the sky is,how pretty the flowers are. I look at the trees, sunset and the clouds moving.
One thing that meant alot to me was"I asked my husband to change".He was never a very loving person.A giving person but not loving.We both now say I LOVE YOU about 3-4 times a day.It means alot to both of us. We also hug everday. He was a Viet Nam vet and received the Purple Heart so he was die hard and rough around the edges. I needed him to change.
I tolerate people more now because I find them hard to get along with.People are different than those I knew growing up. Not much when it come to manners or respect.Like someone said they love animals. Me and many others used to say we liked animals better than people.It was because of so many crude things people would do and the way they acted. I now accept people the way they are.
Lynn Smith
I truly believe what you are saying.I've heard people say WHY ME??? I was shocked. I am like you.I never said "WHY ME"??? I said "WHY ANYONE". This is what I believe. When you day WHY ME its like you wish it was someone else. Not a good way to put it.
Lynn Smith0 -
Ayse
In some ways it was a wake up call. I'm still struggling to lose weight. Gaining weight during menopause and quitting smoking habit has been the cause of most of my health issues. Quitting smoking after 38 years should have been hard but it was easy because I was ready. Unfortunately I started to fill the void with eating. Having high bp & cholesterol, arthritis and now bc should be enough motivation to lose all this extra weight but it's not. I struggle every day.
Char0 -
Yes, wake up call for me and NOT Offendedcahjah75 said:Ayse
In some ways it was a wake up call. I'm still struggling to lose weight. Gaining weight during menopause and quitting smoking habit has been the cause of most of my health issues. Quitting smoking after 38 years should have been hard but it was easy because I was ready. Unfortunately I started to fill the void with eating. Having high bp & cholesterol, arthritis and now bc should be enough motivation to lose all this extra weight but it's not. I struggle every day.
Char
Life is much more sweeter. "For Better or for Worse, Sickness and in Health" takes on a whole new meaning for me than it did 30 years ago when I married my wonderful husband.
It's the simple things that touch my heart more. I wake up every morning Praising the Lord for a beautiful day. I can get through the flu bug or a cold much easier now since I've gone through chemo. I've always pride myself on my good health but now that I lost it during chemo, it is more precious. I see my husband in a completely different light and I ADORE him. Never thought it was possible to love my family more - I found out it is!! Small and insignificant things don't bother me anymore. I've learned what it is to really trust the Lord. I've been stripped of my beauty (hair, breast, scars,& weight)I know that sounds vein but I've always been concerned about how I look. And It's ok - doesn't really matter, my husband and family still loves me and I'm learning to also.0 -
wonderful posting!new2me said:Yes, wake up call for me and NOT Offended
Life is much more sweeter. "For Better or for Worse, Sickness and in Health" takes on a whole new meaning for me than it did 30 years ago when I married my wonderful husband.
It's the simple things that touch my heart more. I wake up every morning Praising the Lord for a beautiful day. I can get through the flu bug or a cold much easier now since I've gone through chemo. I've always pride myself on my good health but now that I lost it during chemo, it is more precious. I see my husband in a completely different light and I ADORE him. Never thought it was possible to love my family more - I found out it is!! Small and insignificant things don't bother me anymore. I've learned what it is to really trust the Lord. I've been stripped of my beauty (hair, breast, scars,& weight)I know that sounds vein but I've always been concerned about how I look. And It's ok - doesn't really matter, my husband and family still loves me and I'm learning to also.
Yes, agree with so many things here - appreciating life more, loving the people around me more, realizing life is short and now is the time to do what I want to do and not to stress over small stuff.
My husband and I were just having this exact same conversation tonight - about cancer being a wakeup call and a fantastic opportunity to re-evaluate your life and your priorities. Would I have chosen to go through this? No! But since I am in it I've seen many changes, many blessings and a lot more appreciation for the good times.
On the flip side though - I'm much more intolerent of what I see as people being fake, putting up fronts in conversations, etc. - I feel like let's cut to the chase, life is short so be honest, be real or don;t bother me - I don't have time for this nonsense!
I;m hoping that the positive changes will stay and my intolerance will lessen as I continue the journey.
Laura0 -
It's only been 4 months fordbhadra said:wonderful posting!
Yes, agree with so many things here - appreciating life more, loving the people around me more, realizing life is short and now is the time to do what I want to do and not to stress over small stuff.
My husband and I were just having this exact same conversation tonight - about cancer being a wakeup call and a fantastic opportunity to re-evaluate your life and your priorities. Would I have chosen to go through this? No! But since I am in it I've seen many changes, many blessings and a lot more appreciation for the good times.
On the flip side though - I'm much more intolerent of what I see as people being fake, putting up fronts in conversations, etc. - I feel like let's cut to the chase, life is short so be honest, be real or don;t bother me - I don't have time for this nonsense!
I;m hoping that the positive changes will stay and my intolerance will lessen as I continue the journey.
Laura
It's only been 4 months for me, but already I am realizing that the people in my life, all of them, are so much more important than the things I have to do. I don't take them for granted anymore and I realize how much they love me, something I didn't think too much about before.
Nancy0 -
No, I know exactly what you
No, I know exactly what you mean. Cancer sucks, but having Death on your shoulder makes Life that much sweeter.0 -
Wow CC that is quite aCypressCynthia said:No, I know exactly what you
No, I know exactly what you mean. Cancer sucks, but having Death on your shoulder makes Life that much sweeter.
Wow CC that is quite a statement!! Life was good before sucky cancer and life is good now. I learned so many lessons pre-cancer, stuff like not sweating the small stuff, livng one day at a time, if you pray why worry, if you worry why pray, accept you and others just as you and they are, move on if people are toxic, set boundaries, and enjoy each day to the fullest because each day is a gift from God.
I must admit that I enjoy life even more now than i did pre-cancer. I try to make the best of every opportunity, maintain a positive attitude, laugh as much as possible, rest when I need to without guilt or remorse. I've even embraced my short grey hair, something I would have never done pre-cancer. I was a fake blonde with very dry hair, now its healthy and soft. I'm grateful to be alive.0
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