Apr 20, 2011 - 2:04 am
Yep, me again *waves*. Please bear with me as I'm kind of using this as a place to get my anxieties out in a supportive environment. So my second surgery is over and the dr tells me there was no evidence of malignancy in the right lobe which is great. i'm waiting to hear from the Nuclear Medicine people to have the RAI, and this is the issue: I don't want the RAI, but I also want to be around for a long time and not have my life cut short by cancer, yet how do I know that the RAI won't turn out to cause bladder cancer or some other cancer that then kills me? As a bit of background I'm a bit of a health nut, I gave birth at home as I generally dislike unecessary medical intervention, every personal product I use from toothpaste to soap to tampons to lipstick is natural and organic, I don't even clean with chemicals....yet I'm prepared to readily ingest a radioactive substance?? If you've read this far you're probably thinking, whoa this chick is nuts! I swear I'm not some weird nutty hippy (ok maybe just a little), but it;s just the way I am. Ok so then I think on the other side of this I've worked so hard to make sure everything I put on my body and in my mouth (same for the kids)has been as natural as possible and guess what...I still got cancer. I've lost count of the times that I've told friends and family off for chronic drinking and smoking "cancer sticks", as I call them, yet they are all as healthy as a horse and *I* got the cancer??!! How is that fair?I feel like an idiot for telling my mother of for drinking diet soft drinks by the gallon because of the link of artificial sweetners and cancer.....yet here I am with cancer.
Weird ramble that I guess has no point. Cancer makes no sense. And yes I will have the RAI as my cancer has already showed vascular invasion but gee it will go against everything I believe in. Thanks for listening to the weird Australian chick and giving me a place to purge.