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Work/Co-workers/Bosses and Cancer?

dixiegirl's picture
dixiegirl
Posts: 1043
Joined: Apr 2006

I got in trouble today guys. For not being 100% while I am at work and the strain it's causing for my co-workers. They would rather me stay home than to do the best I can while I am there. My timing is off. Not staying caught up and then they don't know when to help. I can barely stop crying and don't have the first idea of a clue what to do about it.

There have been so many days leading up to this that is completely overwhelming, both physically with the surgeries and recovery times and this wretched chemo from hell. Nobody does 100% with these kinds of problems do they? Am I just a weak person here? I work in Customer Service and have to talk all day on the phone, and SOUND pleasant and happy regardless how I feel inside. I feel like a schizoid from time to time LOL.

I don't know what to do, honestly. My greatest fear is being trapped in my house with nowhere to go, nothing that I will be able to do. THAT is insanity to me. I really don't want to go there quicker than I am headed. So I guess tomorrow I think I am going to go into work looking like a Stepford wife and do my best not to get myself in any deeper than I already am.

I thought my co-workers liked me, oh well maybe they just tolerate me. I don't know if I can get through a full day without the desire to strangle someone. Wish me luck.

What a nice Happy Birthday to you, huh?

Beth
Crazy sick person.

Buckwirth's picture
Buckwirth
Posts: 1272
Joined: Jun 2010

Is the first place you should go. They are required under the Americans with Disabilities Act to make reasonable accommodations. Your co-workers also have to refrain from creating a hostile work environment.

HR may be able to clear the air. If not, there is always an attorney....

She514's picture
She514
Posts: 47
Joined: Mar 2011

I'm with Buckwirth on this one. I use to work in Human Resources and a hostile workplace is not tolerated. Sorry you have to endure this on top of everything else. Hugs!
Rosie

allmost60's picture
allmost60
Posts: 3147
Joined: Jul 2010

Hi Beth,
Are they nuts, or what..100%!!! There's no way you can be expected to work at that level of performance. I have to agree with the others, go to HR and have a sit down discussion.
I can't imagine working during treatment, though I know many do. Let us know what happens. Hang in there..Love...Sue (FNHL-2-3A-6/10)

truckingalong
Posts: 444
Joined: Aug 2010

Beth,

I returned to work for the first time in 8 months last week. Needless to say, I was a wreck. I was just not with it - I realize it was not ME but my body dealing with the s**t! Yet, I felt crummy for the whole week. Today was a better day. Human Resources lady became more human and was kind enough to remind me that I need to take "baby steps" in my work.

Looking at my co-workers, I do wonder how they feel when dealing with me. I guess it has to do with balance of dealing with this whole thing. I did shared my experiences with them and they seemed to empathize... I surely hope that your co-workers at least become more supportive as time goes along and at least for me. Most importantly, take care of yourself first then work second. I had to leave work early when I was not with it. Best to you.

Hugs,
Liz

onlytoday's picture
onlytoday
Posts: 583
Joined: Jun 2010

Beth,

Naw, you're not crazy. They are not right HR should be able to investigate and solve this for you. It's a hostile work environment and you absolutely do not have to put up with that. Good grief you have enough on your plate already without this.

Keep your chin up and make that call.

We are all with you.

Love,
Donna

NMZ NHL stage iv 05/10 REMISSION 01/11/11

onlytoday's picture
onlytoday
Posts: 583
Joined: Jun 2010

Beth,

Naw, you're not crazy. They are not right HR should be able to investigate and solve this for you. It's a hostile work environment and you absolutely do not have to put up with that. Good grief you have enough on your plate already without this.

Keep your chin up and make that call.

We are all with you.

Love,
Donna

NMZ NHL stage iv 05/10 REMISSION 01/11/11

onlytoday's picture
onlytoday
Posts: 583
Joined: Jun 2010

Beth,

Naw, you're not crazy. They are not right HR should be able to investigate and solve this for you. It's a hostile work environment and you absolutely do not have to put up with that. Good grief you have enough on your plate already without this.

Keep your chin up and make that call.

We are all with you.

Love,
Donna

NMZ NHL stage iv 05/10 REMISSION 01/11/11

onlytoday's picture
onlytoday
Posts: 583
Joined: Jun 2010

Beth,

Naw, you're not crazy. They are not right HR should be able to investigate and solve this for you. It's a hostile work environment and you absolutely do not have to put up with that. Good grief you have enough on your plate already without this.

Keep your chin up and make that call.

We are all with you.

Love,
Donna

NMZ NHL stage iv 05/10 REMISSION 01/11/11

vinny59's picture
vinny59
Posts: 1030
Joined: Nov 2006

Beth, first I would talk to your HR dept., second why don't you scale your hours back a bit? you can still work I believe 32 hrs. and still recieve your benefits..... Vinny

Michele23
Posts: 167
Joined: Mar 2011

Gee Beth, you must work with some real creeps.I'm with you about sitting around at home.What goes around comes around not that I'm wishing cancer on anyone.I'd scale back the hrs. if possible and talk with HR.Hang in there your not crazy.Michele DX95FNHL3

yesyes2
Posts: 461
Joined: Jul 2009

Beth,

I am in agreement that you should talk with HR. You do not need this negative energy in your life right now. I'm just blown away that your working through RICE, you poor dear must be exhausted. And I'd sure like to meet the worker that is at 100% all day everyday. As a former accounting and office manager I've never met that worker, not even me, LOL.

Sending energy and love,
Leslie

KC13167's picture
KC13167
Posts: 215
Joined: Jun 2010

You have been under such extreme pressure lately. You are a smart, wise, brave and caring woman! Share your situation with HR, laws are in place to protect us in the workplace. Your HR rep should be able to problem solve these issues with you. Shame on your supervisor for saying that you are causing strain on your co-workers, he/she needs to get a backbone and speak for him/herself. Just saying! Good luck, let us know how you work it out. Kellie

dixiegirl's picture
dixiegirl
Posts: 1043
Joined: Apr 2006

Today was a little better, although I am sure she knows that I am still a pretty unhappy camper. I sent an email last night from home to my boss and some of my co-workers. I was not nasty, I refuse to drop to that level.

Today my boss seemed somewhat better and only made one comment when she saw me wearing a mask due to germs. I had called HR to see if they had any. Too many people I work closely with are in contact with some extremely sick kids. I am not about to take chances. Once I explained about the possibility of a fever putting me in the hospital she understood, course I felt stupid but stupid is at least healthy and walking around right?

I'm being very careful and found the culprit of the group. At least I know for sure who to be watching. She will not blindside me again. I really do not miss being mid twenties. She's young enough to be my kid. Enough drama.

Take care guys, and you bet I will do what I have to should the need arise. I won't put my life at risk.

Thanks,
Beth

KC13167's picture
KC13167
Posts: 215
Joined: Jun 2010

My company forbids us to wear masks. Some big HR, woo-haa with bird flu. Don't give them any ammunition to "get" you with, especially with a 20-something chick who's not on your side to begin with. YOU are the better person! Kellie

JoanieP's picture
JoanieP
Posts: 573
Joined: Mar 2010

I am so sorry the people at work had no empathy. You are a spunky lady. Speak to HR if you have to everytime you feel like you are being discriminated against. I had small round masks that didn't make me look like I was on the way to rob a bank. Take care and stand up for yourself. You are right. Take care and God bless you. Joanie

amckenney
Posts: 1
Joined: Apr 2011

Hi Beth,

I'm so sorry to hear about the troubles that you have been having. Not sure if you've heard of it before or not, but I work for a non-profit called Cancer and Careers. Our mission is to educate and empower employees with cancer, and we offer a ton of resources including free publications, info on your rights, etc. (check us out at www.cancerandcareers.org).

However I think you might want to take advantage of the career coaching on our website which we offer for free. One of our coaches could help you sort out your work situation.

I hope this helps!

Best,
Alice

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