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Dying changes everything

joyEdi
Posts: 3
Joined: Mar 2011

Life is full of so many hardships. But where in the manual of life does it tell you how to deal with loss of loved ones? Where in a person's life or soul that tells a person how to act when a person dies? My mother died of melanoma stage 4. I watched as she slowly left me and my father, and I have felt an emptiness inside ever since.I also experienced a rush of overwhelming feelings when I had to carry her out to the hearse the night she passed. I feel changed from that, but at the same time I feel blessed because I had the opportunity to say my goodbyes, my tears, and my soul while she was here.

I cry unexpectedly and my emotions are in such chaos that I cannot have fun with my friends without being afraid of what will happen if I relax and party with them. I feel lost and alone because no one else besides my dad and my girlfriend knows the feeling of loss of the one person that was the glue to your life. Please share any stories or anything for that matter with me because I want my healing to feel like it is repairing that ache in my heart that was all for my mother.

Regards,
M.E.

mrsbotch
Posts: 377
Joined: Oct 2010

I just lost my husband of 27 years to esophageal cancer on Feb 23rd. We were closer to each other than any 2 people I know. A major part of me died that day and I cannot get past it. It has only been 2 weeks but he suffered for 4 months with chemo. I am as lost as you and I know this will take a long long time to even feel semi normal again. There are so many of us grieving now. I hate cancer with a passion I have never felt about anything before.

You are not alone if that is any comfort. I am so sorry for you losing your mom and me3 my best friend and sould mate. Life just isn't fair at all sometimes.

barb

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