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Hair...to shave or not to shave???? UPDATE!!! YOU'LL LOVE THIS!

Nana2's picture
Nana2
Posts: 255
Joined: Mar 2010

Jim's hair is coming out in his comb....any suggestions? I told him I think he'll look "hot" bald, but he's not buying it. I think we should just shave it and get it over with and go buy him some new clothes and a hat and go to a movie! He's starting to feel depressed. I'm going to try and get him laughing today, it's good medicine for him. Laughter and Ice cream!!!
Thinking of all of you today.
(hugs)
April

SHAVE OR NOT TO SHAVE PART 2
Pretty hot just like I thought! Kind of a Bruce Willis meets the Hulk look. Other than being a little COLD on top we did fine. I think it did give him some sense of control and now it's done! On his terms! Looks like some good cancer butt kickin' attitude doesn't it?

geotina's picture
geotina
Posts: 2042
Joined: Oct 2009

Well, George was kinda bald to start with but about day 10 after first infusion, he started losing what was left. He has now lost about 85%. I offered to trim what was left and he said no but the rest is coming off this Saturday or at least shaved very close to the head.

Kathryn in MN has a pic on her blog, first she cut her long hair short, then shaved it, her hubby joined her. She is beautiful, hair or no hair.

Just tell Jim you love him not his hair.

Take care - Tina

maglets's picture
maglets
Posts: 2396
Joined: Jun 2006

my Jim is 64 years old.....he has been bald since I met him at age 30.....

all Jims are HOT with no hair.....I love a bald head to pieces....go ahead Jim....shave er off.....:) :)

mags

Nana2's picture
Nana2
Posts: 255
Joined: Mar 2010

They are HOT aren't they Mags? Jim was 30 when I married him and he was receding on the top but I thought he was Hot then and he's still Hot now!!! I offered to shave too...but he won't let me...I guess he doesn't think I'll be so HOT bald. Oh well.

Nana2's picture
Nana2
Posts: 255
Joined: Mar 2010

Yep...we are all beautiful hair or no hair! With the super bowl coming up maybe we can make it a "BEARS" thing do ya think? :-) (I'm sure they'll be there right???) I should maybe take him to a nice salon where they have aromatherapy in a nice dark room with music and they do a relaxing massage of your arms and hands while your head is under a towel. Hmmmmmmmmmm...thinkin maybe I'll go.....sounds good.

pete43lost_at_sea's picture
pete43lost_at_sea
Posts: 3915
Joined: Nov 2010

Hi April,

I am at least half bald anyway. I have had a couple of head shaves over the last month
and love the clean feeling of being totally bald. My hair sort of grows back a little.
Its summer here and pretty warm.

The first time.
I was getting my face shaved this lovelly lady at this classy barber shop near the hospital just before Xmas.

Halfway through got this strange idea.
I asked her could she do my head as well? she said yes.
So I said, this will be a good practical joke I can play on my oncologist.
Lets do it. Half an hour later, and many hot towels and head massages. it was done.
It was very very relaxing and pleasant. I was bald.
She said I had a very round head. I took this as a compliment.
I did have alot of strange red dots on my scalp, that cleared up after my hair was gone.
I was not sure if these were related to chemo or not.

The second one was not so interesting.

Hope this helps. Goodluck with Jim's hair.

cheers,
Pete

Buzzard's picture
Buzzard
Posts: 3073
Joined: Aug 2008

Go with the flow.......It makes it easier for you to not allow any of it to control you...If you cut it before it comes out them in a sense you still have control, and you still look "HOT"..( whew, that felt funny saying) anyway...if it starts to fall out by pieces then the "HOT" kinda fades and it goes into an "ALLEYCAT" mode......dependant on whether April likes cats or not would be the decision that would make my mind up for me...

OK...Lets get this straight...Chippendale or Alleycat ??? The choice is yours :)

Just kiddin with ya....aw its only hair, and yeah we still get to laugh.......Love to ya both, Buzz

AnneCan
Posts: 3693
Joined: Oct 2009

When I started to really lose my hair on irenotecan, my oldest daughter volunteered to cut my hair very short. I saw a preview for a movie where there was a woman with thin, scary hair - I told my family I didn't want to look like her. Interestingly, when we cut my hair we could see there was already some new growth, so I was glad I didn't shave it completely. My younger daughter just said the other day that I look younger with my short hair. My oldest daughter volunteered to shave her head in support of me, but I told her that would make me feel worse. Everyone is different.

pepebcn's picture
pepebcn
Posts: 6352
Joined: Aug 2010

Hugs?

hopeforcure49's picture
hopeforcure49
Posts: 111
Joined: Jan 2011

Men look good bald. My son has been bald since he was 25 and he shaves it all. He leaves a goti for mustache and women love this...hahaha....just remember to use sunblock in summer and now you can use caps or hats. Friend got himself one of the French/Italian caps it looks very distinguised......Blessing from Lourdes

Lovekitties's picture
Lovekitties
Posts: 2884
Joined: Jan 2010

There have been a number of men who have been in the lime light who have been bald, Tele Sevalis and Yule Brenner come to mind.

Get some tootsie pops, some old Tele and Yule films and have a 'bald is very sexy' fest!

I don't think it is the having or not having hair that is the real issue though. As Buzz says, just one more thing that we get no choice over.

Either way, start him a collection of crazy caps. One way to have fun and protect at the same time.

Hugs to you both,

Marie who loves kitties (and thinks bald men are sexy too!)

taraHK
Posts: 1961
Joined: Aug 2003

I cut mine pretty short for a while.Then when it started fallling out, I hacked it myself with a pair of manicure scissors (late at night -- quesitonable move). Now I'm pretty much bald but I have a fun spiky 'Mad Max" kinda look. OK -- I don't go out of the house like this. I have a gorgeous red wig (think "Mad Men') and various beanies for home (or I'm bald at home).

It's a very emotional issue (at least is was for me) -- he's gotta decide.

But I do vote with those who say bald is often gorgeous on men!

Tara

Buzzard's picture
Buzzard
Posts: 3073
Joined: Aug 2008

its either shave it off, or wait it out.....I can sit here and say yeah shave it off, but the more I think about it.....Im thinking "Alleycat"....I usually go against the grain so yeah "Alleycat"...in fact with Folfox mine started thinning pretty good, never came all out but thinned pretty good. Would I shave mine if it started falling out, yeah, but only if no one told me to....so I say naw, leave it. It will take care of itself.....Im thinking that maybe even Persian for me wouldn't be to awful bad...
The point Im trying to make here buddy is that it just don't matter, with cancer all dignity is lost, except for what we provide in humor for ourself at ourself and every chance we get...so hair doesn't mean diddly...Id like my face to look like Mel Gibsons, but instead it looks like Mel Brooks...ya see we just cant have it all, and hair is one of the things that is most dispensable...it grows back, greyer in most cases, but that is earned, kinda like character...look at what hair did to Samson...bummer there huh ? This mess can try to take away all we have, but if we learn to live in spite of it we win...period, we win...and another thing...if the Lord is walking with ya, theres no way you can lose.......Love, Hope, and Alleycats......your friend, Buzz

Kenny H.'s picture
Kenny H.
Posts: 503
Joined: Aug 2010

Been lucky so far. Havent lost any after 6 rounds. (but its thining. was anyway) Main side effects are cold sensativity in hands and nausea after disconnect.

CherylHutch's picture
CherylHutch
Posts: 1399
Joined: Apr 2007

Hey Gracie... I don't think you need to apologize in advance... as a matter of fact, I'm not sure what you are apologizing in advance for

I tend to agree... society has played a real number on us that, unfortunately, does make it more difficult for women than men to be bald. I am not saying that men don't go through their own insecurities and trauma when it's something like cancer that makes them lose their hair. Hey, if you have a full head of hair today and within a week you have to be bald or live with hair that is in tufts, it's bound to make the most strong of us... male or female... get more than a little depressed. Besides losing "control", it is a constant reminder that we have cancer and the cancer is still with us. But from a society perspective, bald men have always been socially accepted. Bald women, on the other hand, get the "Oh my, she has cancer!" or "Oh my... what do you think is wrong with her? Do you think she has cancer??" Then there will be those who want to make a point that there's no stigma against being female and bald because you are going through chemo... and they will try to convince you to wear your baldness with pride for all the females out there who are going through the same thing you are going through.

The thing is, no one is going through the same thing I'm going through... no one has the exact same feelings I do and my feelings can change from day to day, just as anyone else's can... and they may not change at the same time or for the same reasons. If someone is proud of being bald and would like the rest of the world to know they are wearing their baldness on behalf of others, then go for it. I'm happy for you. If someone is timid and would rather the world not know they are bald, or that they are fighting the beast, then they have that right too and they will have to find a way of presenting themselves as such.

As for wigs being "reasonable" in price... I beg to differ . Ok, call me snobby, but I have seen an awful lot of bad wigs in my time, including in the theatre. I don't pay too much attention to the quality of them in the theatre since their purpose is purely for character and costuming and no matter how bad they look up close, with the stage lighting and distance of audience to stage, they will look just fine. But for every day wear... there is nothing worse than a bad wig on a woman (or a bad toupee on a man). I have always wondered what these people are thinking... do they not see how bad the wig/toupee looks, or is it because of financial reasons, they are wearing what they can afford?

Me, I will definitely be going to check out wigs. I have an appt. next Thursday, actually. This will be an appt. to get a proper fit, a proper style and so that I can wear a wig knowing that it looks good and I'm not one of those people that others are saying, "What the heck was she thinking?"

I will not be buying the top of the line human hair wig customized to my head because, with a little bit of luck, in 6 months or so, I might be off of chemo for awhile, hence my own hair will grow back in (or maybe I'll be one of those where it thins out but I don't lose it totally). I'm not sure how much use I'll get out of a wig(s), but I do want to be prepared in case I need one... and like you, if I'm just having a bad hair day, I can put on my wig and away I go ;)

To get one that is half human hair and half fibre, we are looking at the ballpark of $550 + tax. I'm sure that is reasonable for a good wig (I'm no expert... I'm only now starting to see a wig as a reality) ... but it's not in everyone's price range, especially if you'd like to have a couple of them. Now, I know the BC Cancer Agency has a room where you can go in and pick two wigs and you get them for free. These wigs come from people/salons donating them, so you may luck out and get a good, expensive one that suits you, or maybe the ones they have have seen better days. I think this is a wonderful service, but now that it is me that needs one, I guess I have to admit I'm a bit of a snob :( Something as personal as a wig, I have to admit, I'd want one that has been customized to my head, rather than me use someone else's.

Anywho... I shall let you know how I fair next Thurs... if I can find something that calls out "This is ME!" :D

Cheryl

plh4gail's picture
plh4gail
Posts: 1232
Joined: Oct 2010

You go Jim!! I'm smiling and happy for you! Enjoy this day!

Lot's of hugs, Gail

hopeforcure49's picture
hopeforcure49
Posts: 111
Joined: Jan 2011

I think April needs to hang on to you......Blessings Lourdes

pepebcn's picture
pepebcn
Posts: 6352
Joined: Aug 2010

Very nice look!.

Buzzard's picture
Buzzard
Posts: 3073
Joined: Aug 2008

Some wear bald well some don't...I think it looks great myself. I think the step taken was one of many great steps he will make through this........Good for you Mr Jim, good for you, Love to you both......Buzz

mukamom's picture
mukamom
Posts: 357
Joined: Oct 2010

The look suits him well!

AnneCan
Posts: 3693
Joined: Oct 2009

Jim looks awesome!

allmost60's picture
allmost60
Posts: 3150
Joined: Jul 2010

Very handsome Jim! I didn't lose my hair after six rounds of CVP-R, but it has gotten very very thin. Had long hair hair before chemo, but cut it short in preparation of losing it... then it didn't happen...ha! As they say in New York.."fahgitaboutit"...you look great!
Sue (FNHL-2-3A-6/10)

Annabelle41415's picture
Annabelle41415
Posts: 4190
Joined: Feb 2009

Looks pretty handsome if you ask me :)

Kim

tootsie1's picture
tootsie1
Posts: 5001
Joined: Feb 2008

You tell him he's definitely HOT!

*hugs*
Gail

plh4gail's picture
plh4gail
Posts: 1232
Joined: Oct 2010

Jim you look great! And guess what...you inspired me. I went to the salon yesterday and my yesterday's longer hair is now above my shoulder. I know in my picture it looks short, but I'm minus about 8 inches of hair. lol. It feels great! I've heard mine will only thin, but it was really getting me down seeing it happen. It looks different and makes me feel better. Thanks my dear!!!

Smiles for us, Gail

Nana2's picture
Nana2
Posts: 255
Joined: Mar 2010

Awwww, Gail that's wonderful. It really cheered us up too. We went out with my son and his wife and the 2 and 5 year old grand kids for lunch yesterday. The kids were interested but not upset at Papa's new look. Then went to see our Daughter and her husband for dinner and they tried several hats on him to keep his head warm. Was a good day til I slipped on the ice going to get the car and landed on my side and shoulder. Okay but sore today! It's amazing how you are actually already ON the ground before you even know you're falling! Oh well, that's what we get for living near Chicago.
I'm so happy Jim inspired your new look. I just told him.
Hugs...and thanks to everyone for the responses. It made what could have been really tough...go a lot smoother. Have a great finish to your weekend. We're going to watch the Bears play at our Son's house today. GO BEARS!
((Hugs again))
April

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