Jan 15, 2011 - 6:50 am
Hi, Its been five and half months since my mum passed away aged 61 with ovarian cancer, she was diagnosed and two and half weeks later she passed away. Their is my dad and my sister and we are all so close as a family, we still are but the pain, its my mums birthday this thursday and Im having these awful dreams when she is fighting this awful disease. I am maxed on my anti depressants and they are doing a good job, I dont really believe this has happened and we will be a family again. I cant think of my mum without crying all the time so is this the way it has to be that I cant think of my mum without the pain and tears. I do miss my mum so much You cant describe the pain unless you have been through it and I know most of you lovely people have and are in the same horrible boat as me, my boat is called the titanic cos Im sinking. Why oh why do things have to change, life was ok but now life is bad and will never be good again. Sorry for my rant but I read all the posts on here and I know there are no soloutions and this is a journey we have to do alone, but I still want to scream give her back to me. A question for you, if you could turn the clock back one year and relieve the whole year again but you could not change a thing would you? my answer is no, yes I would love to see my mum again and enjoy everything about my mum but I could not go through the whole pain again, I dont know if that makes me selfish , sorry Im ranting on now.