Is anyone else scared? After Elizabeth Edwards passing, I feel very anxious about a recurrence, and

feelings
Yes ... Elizabeth's death did stir up feelings in me ... but I must admit that ... it makes me feel even more determined than ever to live life to the fullest and value every minute. Elizabeth lived her life with such class ... and such grace ... if I could live the rest of my life with that grace and serenity ... I will die a fulfilled woman. Maybe it's because I'm almost 67 that I feel this way ... and perhaps if I was in my 30's I would feel terrified and stressed about the future. But ... at my age ... seeing Elizabeth go with so much peace and acceptance ... is actually very comforting. I hope I can do the same when my time comes. She was quite an amazing woman.

love,
teena

fear
If it helps at all you are not alone...I had the same thoughts myself..Just when you think it is fading the thoughts of the beast sneak up on you...I feel really bad for Elizabeth E. but women and families are facing this every day just not in the public eye..
Is it correct that she had a reoccurance after 3 years? I wish we knew more details...
Sending you lots of pink support....

chenheart said:

It was indeed "odd" but no,
It was indeed "odd" but no, I am not overly frightened...probably because I am already going through it! The reason it is odd? Elizabeth and I are the exact same age, both BC, both recurrance with liver mets. The coincidences in that slapped me in the face, I admit!

That having been said, tomorrow I am headed to beautiful Palm Springs to hear my Reggie sing, and on Saturday he and I will be in equally beautiful Lake Tahoe at a Leon Russell concert. Today is all we have...I still make, and will hopefully be able to keep future plans for as long as I am able. And, Elizabeth, as far as I can tell, was a wonderful role model for doing just that.

Hugs,
Chen♥

I absolutely agree with Chen
I absolutely agree with Chen and the rest of the gals. It is important to cherish every moment we have with as much gusto our bodies will allow. My mom always said "when It's your time, It's your time". My mom died at the age of 40 from open heart surgery. My mom's death had me frightened from age 40 to 45. I'll be 68 next month and yes I do think about recurrence, but I will not let any of it interfere with enjoying every day I have.

My husband broke the news to me yesterday and we both cried. I said to him, this is one of the realities of BC. We fight this beast with all our might but when it's our time, it's our time. I cried for myself because the reality hit home. I also cried for her and her orphaned children. She was certainly a role model for us pink sisters. She kept on living and moving on till her maker called her home.

Dianne this is a time of reflection for all us gals, but whatever happens you know we will do everything we can to survive.

candacemc said:

Oh Kelly...
I'm feeling the exact same thing. If I could run from it, I'd be on a plane right now! I stayed up all night last night after watching the Elizabeth interview, scared to death! It seems like most of the pink sisters on here, that have had experience with this (long term), have the strength I so seek. Their encouraging words, patience and love seem to give me the courage to face another day. I hope you find this to be true for yourself, as well.

Candacemc - I was doing great until yesterday.
Yes, it always encourages me when I hear pink sisters talk with such wisdom. And I know our emotions will be like a rollercoaster especially when we hear about a death from breast cancer. I just needed to cry. But I think i scared my husband. Now, he's all worried and wants us to take off work to be together.
Talking about it here really help me to understand my own emotions and work through them.

new2me said:

Candacemc - I was doing great until yesterday.
Yes, it always encourages me when I hear pink sisters talk with such wisdom. And I know our emotions will be like a rollercoaster especially when we hear about a death from breast cancer. I just needed to cry. But I think i scared my husband. Now, he's all worried and wants us to take off work to be together.
Talking about it here really help me to understand my own emotions and work through them.

Kelly
I was not doing great until yesterday, it just made me worse. jeesh. I have upcoming appts. with a therapist and am joining a group in January. I don't have the supportive husband, in fact, as I read all these stories of husbands holding you, hugging you, telling you everything is going to be ok... it breaks my heart. I've never heard any of those things from mine. I can't even talk about it because I'm leaving for Houston in a bit and don't want to cry the entire drive...

MyTurnNow said:

No, I guess I say that
No, I guess I say that because I have had a recurrence this year (original dx in 6/09 and recurrence in 7/10). I can tell you that being told those 3 words a second time really wasn't as devastating as hearing them the first time. I believe the fact that I am more knowledgeable helped me accept it. Plus, I fought and won the first time and I planned on fighting and winning this time, and the next (if there is one). I don't spend a lot of time worrying about it because that will not change anything. Who knows how long each and every one of us has left on this earth, what's important is what we do with our lives. I truly believe that! In addition, I have ALL of YOU to provide support and knowledge and that's priceless!!

No situation is exactly the same.
What made me most concerned for Elizabeth's survival was that her personal life was so tragic. She handled it well on the outside, but the stress must have been unbearable at times. We all know what stress does to our immune systems. I said to my husband that her husband's bad choices could have shortened her life. I know someone who lived 14 years after a Stage 4 diagnosis and that was more than 10 years ago when they had fewer options. None of us is a statistic so I will do my best not to worry about what I can't control. It isn't always easy.

Roseann

Absolutely - feel the same
Absolutely - feel the same way - I've been doing so well lately with not dwelling on bc and actually living my life, looking for a new job, painting the house etc as if I never even had cancer and then all of a sudden this just whacked me over the head. I feel so very bad for her and her family and I hope she's in a better place. I feel extremely anxious and worried and have been searching the internet for as much info as I can find but details aren't readily available. Bottom line is we can't drive ourselves crazy with details because everyone's bc is totally unique and just as there are those like Elizabeth who have seen the worst of this disease, there are just as many that are surviving and thriving. Now I need to have that talk with myself that says just take one day at a time and after all, I could get run over by a bus tomorrow so I won't let this beast win by taking one more day away from me by drowning in my own worry.