Sep 13, 2010 - 11:25 am
I wasn’t sure if I should add this to an already existing post or make a new one – so anyway here goes.
My brother in-law is well to do. He is retired and has a good income. When my wife (His only sister and sibling) died I asked if he would be willing to share half the cost of her funeral. He agreed. The funeral home knows me and gave a discount but his share was about $3000.00 He and my wife had a "Love hate relationship." They cared for eachother but did not communicate much. He did not do much for her when she was treated for her cancer. He was more concerned about the property he owns. (My bias at work here)
The problem was that he second guessed my every decision. He didn’t trust the funeral home. He got lost getting to her grave side service (The funeral director actually got into his car and helped him find his way to the cemetery.) Then as we were leaving the graveside service he called me on my cell and was upset we did not stay to see her casket lowered into the ground because “People sometimes rob bodies and use them as cadavers for medical studies.”
It was at that point I almost lost it. I bit my lip and said “Al, this is a reputable funeral home. Nothing is going to happen to your sister’s body. If you want to stay at the graveside until they lower the casket you are certainly welcome to do so.”
This was last August 4th. Since that time I have heard nothing from him. Nada, zilch. He won’t respond to my e-mails or phone calls. I have decided I can only do so much. I offered to remain a part of his family network but I am not going to grovel.
I think it is sad that he only has one blood living relative left, my daughter, his beautiful niece, but he has not made contact with her either.
At what point do I say “The hell with this crap?”