I'm having a really hard time dealing with my diagnosis. I found out on Thursday that I've got cervical cancer, but we won't know until Tuesday how far it's spread. I'm really afraid that it's affected other parts of my body because I've had the symptoms for a long, long time. I wasn't entirely shocked at the news, but I was devastated none-the-less.
I'm still pretty upset.
I feel alone, even though I'm not. I feel scared, regretful, angry, anxious... I have moments of confidence and moments of inspiration, but the waves of sadness and despair crash heavily like breakwater on the shoreline.
I could really use some comfort and support.
I have so many questions. Like:
What is the survival rate of cervical cancer patients?
How do I know I can fully trust my doctor?
Should I get multiple opinions and how much precious time will that waste?
Can I still have sex?! What will sex be like after a radical hysterectomy (which was suggested, but we'll know more after my PET scan on Tuesday)?
What kind of nutrition plan should I begin? Is it safe to travel during treatment?
How long does treatment last?
How do I deal with these crying spells?
How do I communicate my feelings to others?
All sorts of things plague my mind and I feel like I'm drowning. I'm so scared.