I am feeling guilty, My husband is the one with the Cancer in his throat and here I am complaining and feeling sorry for myself! But I have lost half my family and I am only 50 Will be 51 next week.
I lost the baby of the family in 1997 to a car wreck, my sister Karen (Beautiful young lady at age of 29)
Lost my mother Mary 2 years later to melanoma (age 61) then
Lost my baby brother Jimmy in 2007 (his age 39, and buried him on his birthday).
I have 2 brothers left 1 older and 1 younger, my Father is living but remarried and don't see much because of step mommy dearest ( you get the picture) any way!!
As you can see I have had a rough life, full of lose that is not normal. Now I am facing loosing my husband of 28 years to this da## cancer and he is only 68. He is starting to feel the effects of the treatments, with mucus, can't swallow, soar mouth and gums, hard time finding something he can eat and so on, he is getting scared himself of what is next?
Why have the Drs not done surgery on his stage 4A tonsil cancer that has spread to 2 lymph nodes. I under stand what stage 4 is but doesn't he deserve the possible treatment to save his life!!!
They are only doing cisplatin (3 treatments) and 8 weeks of rads. They had said it has spread to the lung but found out after a pet it was ( not cancer?) Then what the he## is it???
I feel I am going to be loosing my husband and I feel like i am drowning!!!
I don't want to hear "hang in there and 1 day at a time" (that is all any of us have ) I need true and believable facts to get me through the next few months and hopefully years of our lives!
I am sorry I sound so as a matter of fact, BUT when you go through life with lose after lose it makes you sort of feel numb when you face another possible lose in your life.
(HOW MUCH MORE CAN A PERSON ENDURE) I know the answer ( no more than god knows you can take) right? Well I am starting to question that answer!!!!! I have had about all I can stand. Waiting for some facts not hope!
Love you all