May 03, 2010 - 4:40 am
I was doing well handling everything until this last week. Week before last we got positive news on my sons cancer and how it is reacting to the chemo so was doing real well, then this week I read on Facebook that someone I went to school with lost her daughter to cancer, man that just hit way too close to home. I almost went back emotionally to where I was two and half months ago when we got Scott's diagnosis. It brought back all the fear of losing my son again, almost everything, I really thought I was going to lose it. As the week has progressed I am doing better but still it is hard. I have read of others losing loved ones on here and it was scary but when I read about someone I know, someone my age with a child close to my sons age, it just made it all the more real and brought back all the fears again. I have not felt I could really talk to my family about it since we are all trying to have a positive attitude and I really do not want to bring them down too, so I thought here might be the best place to put my feelings since many of you are going through the same thing as we are, either with yourself, a loved one or a very close friend, so maybe you can understand how I have felt this week. I would like to think this will be my only crisis point for awhile but I have my doubts I have a feeling I will have others. I really am trying to be strong but the whole idea of my child (no matter how old he is, he is 31) going through this is devistating and the idea of losing him to this horrible disease is even more devistating. If any of you have any suggestions on how to help me cope I would love to hear from you.