Surprise News
And that's the way it is and I'm done bellyachin for today.
Love you all you fabulous ladies!
Pat
Comments
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Pat
I am so sorry Pat. I understand how you feel. If you read the discussion thread I posted of Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, it explains how one of my girlfriend's said to me that since my main treatments for my bc were done, that I could go back to the way I was. It really hurt me as it was like, doesn't anyone understand that I can't? I just blew it off, but, it really bothered me. I don't understand your Mother not understanding though. I would think every woman would understand your decision to do more surgery IF the cancer came back, which I pray it never does.
And, your downer mood? We all go thru it. Just don't STAY in it. I truly think it goes hand in hand with a bc diagnosis. Like you, I am still very new out of treatment, not years, just a few months. I am thinking positive that you will get past this. And, if you need to shed some steam, you found the place to do it..right here.
Take Care Pat!
♥ Megan0 -
I understand
Even though I am estrogen negative, I still had the oncotype test and my number was through the roof, almost double yours. Nobody knows the validity of oncotype for estrogen negative cancer, but I sure didn't like seeing that number. My doctor didn't want to show it to me, either. The good thing is that they took the necessary steps to treat it aggressively so that that rate is drastically lowered. Chemo is very good for aggressive tumors. It really attacks them. You can feel good that you did everything you could to beat the beast. Hugs to you.
Mimi0 -
Pat, I am actually laughing
Pat, I am actually laughing at your comment "their only use for me right now is to hold my bra down so it doesn't strangle me". There is a lot of truth to that. I can say that I agree with you and IF I ever have a recurrence those babies are gone...G O N E!! Hopefully, none of us will have to deal with this again, but, if we do, we'll make our own decisions. Take care!!0 -
PatMegan M said:Pat
I am so sorry Pat. I understand how you feel. If you read the discussion thread I posted of Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, it explains how one of my girlfriend's said to me that since my main treatments for my bc were done, that I could go back to the way I was. It really hurt me as it was like, doesn't anyone understand that I can't? I just blew it off, but, it really bothered me. I don't understand your Mother not understanding though. I would think every woman would understand your decision to do more surgery IF the cancer came back, which I pray it never does.
And, your downer mood? We all go thru it. Just don't STAY in it. I truly think it goes hand in hand with a bc diagnosis. Like you, I am still very new out of treatment, not years, just a few months. I am thinking positive that you will get past this. And, if you need to shed some steam, you found the place to do it..right here.
Take Care Pat!
♥ Megan
I completly know what you mean. I know that if I have a reoccurance in either breast, I will have a bilateral. Those who have not experienced this disease, cannot truely understand. People expect us to be back to our normal selves, they can't relate to the terror which wakes us up in the middle of the night wondering if it will come back. I sometimes experience post tramatic stress when I wash my hair ( when I was losing my hair, I ended up with a scalp full of hair in my hand in the shower). I am just about six months out after the rough chemo (AC/taxol x12) still on Herceptin and I honestly want to forget the whole ordeal. Sorry for the rant, but I really can relate to how you feel.
I think we need to live in the moment and enjoy life and not let this define us. Speaking of living in the moment, I thought of you last night. I saw Paul McCartney for the first time at the Hollywood Bowl. He was absolutly wonderful, and for the first time in a long time I almost forgot I had bc. Love Surf0 -
I work for an elderly woman,
I work for an elderly woman, and when I returned to work she said, "well it's over so just forget about it". Kinda hard to do, right? Lots of people have told me I will be just fine, LIKE THEY KNOW! And then there is that whole "positive attitude" thing. That makes me want to scream! When it is you in this situation you must do what is right for you!! Everyone is entitled to their own feelings! I think people mean well, they just don't realize what they are saying may hurt.
Good luck to you,
Cher0 -
Oh Wow1surfermom said:Pat
I completly know what you mean. I know that if I have a reoccurance in either breast, I will have a bilateral. Those who have not experienced this disease, cannot truely understand. People expect us to be back to our normal selves, they can't relate to the terror which wakes us up in the middle of the night wondering if it will come back. I sometimes experience post tramatic stress when I wash my hair ( when I was losing my hair, I ended up with a scalp full of hair in my hand in the shower). I am just about six months out after the rough chemo (AC/taxol x12) still on Herceptin and I honestly want to forget the whole ordeal. Sorry for the rant, but I really can relate to how you feel.
I think we need to live in the moment and enjoy life and not let this define us. Speaking of living in the moment, I thought of you last night. I saw Paul McCartney for the first time at the Hollywood Bowl. He was absolutly wonderful, and for the first time in a long time I almost forgot I had bc. Love Surf
I have a friend who saw him the other night in Arizona. One of the radio stations here is having a contest and the winner and a guest will fly to London for his concert in the park this summer. Wouldn't it be nice to win, or know someone who wins? And you are right - it did make me feel like I was 17 again, sitting in Shea Stadium screaming my head off and no bc. I hope you had as great a time as I did. But I hope you had closer seats than we had. Keep checking on my expressions - I just uploaded pictures from my camera and will upload some to my page here.
Pat0 -
That is one thought thatunknown said:This comment has been removed by the Moderator
That is one thought that totally frightens me. At this stage, being out of treatment for 6 months, the insurance would probably say its elective surgery and not pay or reduce what they pay, and that is something that is totally out of my reach. But believe me m-star, it is a thought that has crossed my mind a lot lately.
Thanks for the hugs -
Pat0 -
Hi Mimimimivac said:I understand
Even though I am estrogen negative, I still had the oncotype test and my number was through the roof, almost double yours. Nobody knows the validity of oncotype for estrogen negative cancer, but I sure didn't like seeing that number. My doctor didn't want to show it to me, either. The good thing is that they took the necessary steps to treat it aggressively so that that rate is drastically lowered. Chemo is very good for aggressive tumors. It really attacks them. You can feel good that you did everything you could to beat the beast. Hugs to you.
Mimi
I was naive enough to think that 34 meant 34% chance, which while high, was manageable. But when she said 51% - it shocked the *&^% out of me. I can only imagine how you felt with your score. We all deserve hugs for beating the beast. To those of us finished and those at the beginning through the middle - keep up the good fight!!!
Hugs - Pat0 -
Hi Pat!
I had my test a year ago. My score was 18. I am big on the details and read through the materials carefully. As I recall, the test scores are an indication but NOT the only variable in recurrence. There is so much they still do not know. I am good friends with an ex-breast cancer surgeon who said that he once operated on a women (in the early 80s) who had invasive and aggressive breast cancer who refused both chemo and radiation. He thought she was a goner. He saw her a few months ago and she is going strong in her 80s. No one knows what will happen. I say enjoy today and to hell with stats. We are not stats and there is more to this than how they rate our tumors. God bless!
Roseann0 -
It is my feeling thatroseann4 said:Hi Pat!
I had my test a year ago. My score was 18. I am big on the details and read through the materials carefully. As I recall, the test scores are an indication but NOT the only variable in recurrence. There is so much they still do not know. I am good friends with an ex-breast cancer surgeon who said that he once operated on a women (in the early 80s) who had invasive and aggressive breast cancer who refused both chemo and radiation. He thought she was a goner. He saw her a few months ago and she is going strong in her 80s. No one knows what will happen. I say enjoy today and to hell with stats. We are not stats and there is more to this than how they rate our tumors. God bless!
Roseann
It is my feeling that statistics are only to determine what treatment you need. you were treated aggressively and there is no reason to believe it didnt work. You may have had a fire in the barn but if it didnt spread doesnt matter. Your life changes dramatically after BC, or any other trauma. I was a 16 year survivor prior to getting it in the other breast. I wanted a propholactic and my insurance would have paid, but the cancer was already there. and more involved than my first one. This is my second chemo and radiation and mastectomy. Trust me I am not Pollyanna, and it is normal to have your moments of terror, but other people want to get on with their lives so they say stupid things. Dont look to them for validation look to us WE KNOW!!! Mimi is right chemo works well on aggressive cancers.0 -
my score was 32....carkris said:It is my feeling that
It is my feeling that statistics are only to determine what treatment you need. you were treated aggressively and there is no reason to believe it didnt work. You may have had a fire in the barn but if it didnt spread doesnt matter. Your life changes dramatically after BC, or any other trauma. I was a 16 year survivor prior to getting it in the other breast. I wanted a propholactic and my insurance would have paid, but the cancer was already there. and more involved than my first one. This is my second chemo and radiation and mastectomy. Trust me I am not Pollyanna, and it is normal to have your moments of terror, but other people want to get on with their lives so they say stupid things. Dont look to them for validation look to us WE KNOW!!! Mimi is right chemo works well on aggressive cancers.
& I had a unilateral. Had I known my score before my surgery I would have opted for both. I'm trying to be healthy and do all the right things - diet, exercise, etc but I realize there are no guarantees - what we'd all like! I'm just thankful for each day and my wonderful hubby, great kids (most of the time) - and not taking one thing for granted! Life is so very, very good! We are all blessed! And all of you, pink sisters have been such an inspiration to me - if I'd never gotten this terrible disease I would have truely missed out on all your love and caring - and that has been and continues to be a great gift!
much love,
Jenny0 -
surprise news
I can SO identify with you, Pat. I had bi-lateral estrogen + , a right breast mastectomy, chemo & rads. When I told my mom I was considering having the right breast taken along with reconstruction, she was shocked. She thinks I am "done", and should just recover. I told her that I have a chance of re occurance & it's just not what I want to think about . I don't need or want the breast. I want to be as positive and aggressive as possible. A few friends seemed surprised at my decision, but I told them I did not make it lightly & that I just needed their support. Luckily, my best friend totally agrees with me, (she is a nurse) & that helps.
Hang in there, I want to hear how you do, because it helps me & all others like us!0 -
i think
I think people will never understand that is battle will never be over once you have started it and its hard for them to understand what you are going though unless they have been there them self.i wish you the best of luck and i know that every thing will work out for the best for you. girl power0 -
I don't know my number butshortscake said:i think
I think people will never understand that is battle will never be over once you have started it and its hard for them to understand what you are going though unless they have been there them self.i wish you the best of luck and i know that every thing will work out for the best for you. girl power
I don't know my number but it is high. I am a triple negative and like Moopsy was told it was hard to truly interpret since I am a negative. I am going with a double mastecomy. Even if the hadn't gave me the percentage of reoccurance I still would do a double mastectomy. This is not something I want to go thru again.0 -
51% recurrence if you do not do Chemoshortscake said:i think
I think people will never understand that is battle will never be over once you have started it and its hard for them to understand what you are going though unless they have been there them self.i wish you the best of luck and i know that every thing will work out for the best for you. girl power
since you went through Chemo and radiation your recurrence rate is very low. Oncotype test is relatively new and has 't enough statistics. It has been used to decide weather or not patient needs Chemo and how many cycles. Your score number 34 translated in recurrence rate 51% without doing Chemo. Based on these results your oncologist decided to treat you aggressively.
You did Chemo Now you have been cured.
Wishing you the best0 -
Sweet Sister...have you
Sweet Sister...have you somehow forgotten where you are and who you are speaking to??? If you feel the need to amputate your LEGS, ARMS, BACKSIDE AND TOES to up your chances of not getting a recurrance~ you didn't think anyone here on the CSN discussion boards would try and tell you you have no right or are crazy, did you???? Those on the "outside", bless their hearts , have nothing to compare it to. But OMG...we do! Research, talk to professionals who have your best interest at heart, float it past us here on the boards~ and make a decision you can truly live with! We support and love you no matter what that decision is!
Hugs,
Chen♥0 -
jphilpo,I bumped up thejphilpo said:surprise news
I can SO identify with you, Pat. I had bi-lateral estrogen + , a right breast mastectomy, chemo & rads. When I told my mom I was considering having the right breast taken along with reconstruction, she was shocked. She thinks I am "done", and should just recover. I told her that I have a chance of re occurance & it's just not what I want to think about . I don't need or want the breast. I want to be as positive and aggressive as possible. A few friends seemed surprised at my decision, but I told them I did not make it lightly & that I just needed their support. Luckily, my best friend totally agrees with me, (she is a nurse) & that helps.
Hang in there, I want to hear how you do, because it helps me & all others like us!
jphilpo,
I bumped up the thread about Hogwarts for you...did you get a chance to read it??? I wrote it with you, and other new ones in mind!
Hugs,
Chen0 -
Jphilpo...read my postjphilpo said:surprise news
I can SO identify with you, Pat. I had bi-lateral estrogen + , a right breast mastectomy, chemo & rads. When I told my mom I was considering having the right breast taken along with reconstruction, she was shocked. She thinks I am "done", and should just recover. I told her that I have a chance of re occurance & it's just not what I want to think about . I don't need or want the breast. I want to be as positive and aggressive as possible. A few friends seemed surprised at my decision, but I told them I did not make it lightly & that I just needed their support. Luckily, my best friend totally agrees with me, (she is a nurse) & that helps.
Hang in there, I want to hear how you do, because it helps me & all others like us!
Jphilpo...read my post titled Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. It says everything you are talking about. Hope it helps!0 -
THANK YOUchenheart said:Sweet Sister...have you
Sweet Sister...have you somehow forgotten where you are and who you are speaking to??? If you feel the need to amputate your LEGS, ARMS, BACKSIDE AND TOES to up your chances of not getting a recurrance~ you didn't think anyone here on the CSN discussion boards would try and tell you you have no right or are crazy, did you???? Those on the "outside", bless their hearts , have nothing to compare it to. But OMG...we do! Research, talk to professionals who have your best interest at heart, float it past us here on the boards~ and make a decision you can truly live with! We support and love you no matter what that decision is!
Hugs,
Chen♥
ALL OF YOU!!!! I guess yesterday it hit me and not in a good way. Your responses and advice and love are helping to pull me out of this pit I put myself into. I sincerely hope I never have to make the decision, but if it happens, I will do it. What's that old song say? "We've done it before, and we can do it again." Not that we want to, but there are so many pink ladies on this board that have done it over and over again and are still so strong and reslilant that I am in total awe of you'all. Right now, I'm putting it on the back burner and will not think about it - its Spring, the sun is shining, the cherry blossoms are in full bloom and Sunday is Easter! A time for re-birth, renewal and chocolate bunnies - yumm!
I hope all of you ladies have a Wonderful Easter/Passover, and know that nothing but good loving thoughts go out to you all for being here for me and for everyone. Without this board and all of you, our world would be incredibly smaller.
Hugs to all of you!
Pat0
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