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Had feeding tube taken out today!

fishingirl's picture
fishingirl
Posts: 188
Joined: Nov 2009

I had my feeding tube taken out! And it didn't hurt one bit! Here I was worried for nothing:)Now I'm on my own. Sink or swim. I will still drink 4 Ensure a day, untill I get up closer to the weight I should be.

Also, I have been feeling a little down. And I should be one of the happiest girls in the world! My husband thinks it's because I am still feeling the effects of the radiation. Could be this gloomy weather too. lol! Is it common for one to still feel a bit depressed when you were told cancer free?

Cindy

jeb54321
Posts: 22
Joined: Sep 2009

Great news! That is definite progress!

As for feeling down, it is apparently very common. I agree with the sentiment that it is at least in part the effect of going from having a posse of doctors going over you with a fine tooth comb daily, to suddenly being "out there" on your own. Being a "survivor" means you no longer have all that "attention" you got while under treatment.

Up here in the Boston area a sportscaster for the Red Sox, Jerry Remy, fought his battle and won, but then sank into such a deep depression that he couldn't go back to work. Apparently he visited the press box during a game, they turned the camera on him, and he got a standing ovation from the crowd, which was at least in part responsible for him getting back on the horse.

But that is just one example of someone not recovering emotionally for a long time after SUCCESSFUL treatment.

Also, they talk about getting used to your "new life". I've decided thats what the TV industry calls "spin". This "new life" may be cancer free, and thats a GOOD thing, but there are a lot of changes that are very hard to get used to. You are reminded every day that things are "different" now. Yes, you won, but not without a price, and its hard to get used to.

Its very important to revel in your success, and learn to accept the changes, and for that, you may need help. At the very least, I'd consider a cancer survivor's support group, if not actual therapy if you have the insurance coverage. Its a very tough time for many people, but you are not alone.

Good luck!

Landranger25's picture
Landranger25
Posts: 208
Joined: Nov 2009

That's good news Cindy. I was a little worked up about getting mine out as well. Keep eating and trying different foods. I am having trouble adding weight despite a good appetite. (10 back of 35 lost so far) I think I need to get out for more physical activity and that will help. Count your blessings this holiday and keep it up. Beating this is an accomplishment. Won't end up on a resume ro anything but we are certainly part of an elite group.

Mike

cwcad's picture
cwcad
Posts: 117
Joined: Nov 2009

Some of the best advice that I have read on this forum. If only I had come here sooner.

Please take time to address the feelings you have. The better your mental health is the better able you are to battle the disease that you are trying to beat with surgery, chemo and radiation.

carolinagirl67's picture
carolinagirl67
Posts: 153
Joined: Jul 2009

I think it is totally normal to be depressed. You have been through hell and you have had so much different emotions. It will take some time before you get back to anything that resembles normal. My husband went through this and has been out of treatment for three months. He is just getting back to himself. I can still see him a down from time to time because his body has changed so much. But we just take one day at a time. You are a survivor and that is something very special. Take care! Donna

fishingirl's picture
fishingirl
Posts: 188
Joined: Nov 2009

Thank you all for your kind words. Especially Jeb:) You made perfect sense. I was thinking there was something wrong with me. Now I know that it does happen to some people as well. I wish I did have some sort of support group here. But we live in a very small town and we don't have such a thing. So I have to keep this to myself. That's why I love to come to this site. You are my support system:) And I appreciate it very much:) Maybe in a few months when Spring comes things will look much brighter.
Thanks again everyone,
cindy

Hondo's picture
Hondo
Posts: 5894
Joined: Apr 2009

Don’t worry too much about the good and bad day things it too is another side affect of all the treatment on your body. Find something you like to do and do it on days you don’t feel so good. Your husband may hate me for telling you this if you like to shop.

Take care

fishingirl's picture
fishingirl
Posts: 188
Joined: Nov 2009

lol! That's funny Hondo!! I DO love to shop! My husband won't hate you for that, he just wants to see me happy again. Thanks for the advice:)

Cindy

Scambuster's picture
Scambuster
Posts: 975
Joined: Nov 2009

Well done Cindy - you are now Tube free. I just removed the bandaid patch on my wound last night and it's a great feeling.

If you feel your moods are really getting you down, seek advice, don't wait too long. It is absolutely normal that you 'may' feel depressed after what you have been through. I waited and did not recognize the symptoms and crashed and burned but once the Doctors recognized I was suffering depression, they sorted me out very quickly. Don;t be afraid to let them know.

Stay well.
Scambuster

Kent Cass's picture
Kent Cass
Posts: 1747
Joined: Nov 2009

Cindy and Scambuster- I hope to join you in a month, or so. Happy for both of you.

And I second Scambuster's opinion on feeling down, and what to do. Every C diagnosis brings with it trauma, and the experiences of head and neck treatment(s) only serve to compound that trauma with more. The battle is large, and in it's wake may develop a void which can be filled with the darkened likes of depression, etc. The Medical Community is aware of this, and their care does not end when the active treatments end- that is the time for you to determine when an end is right by you. I was lucky enough to return to work a month after treatment ended, so keeping busy has helped, as has this forum and everyone's words, and my belief. Still, C does change one's life, and that includes the time of post-treatment, and I suspect we all share in the struggle with it to varying degrees.

Believe.

kcass

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