My dad was a smoker for as long as I can remember, because I was born a second hand smoker and I am fifty now. He was 26 when I came to the planet. About 4 months ago, I made him go to the doctor for what I thought was a respiratory infection, turns out he had Squamous Cell Carcinoma in his left lung. Primary care doctor ordered him to do a CAT SCAN, then referred him to Oncologist, they scheduled PET Scan, MRI and finally a CT Guided Biopsy.
Doctors said, he had Lung Cancer stage3b and that it had spread to the lymphnodes. A 4.6cm tumuor was found in lower left lung. The doctors said it had not spread to his brain which must be common with this type cancer. They scheduled him for radiation/chemotherapy and we started going to the machine 5 days a week with a visit to a chemo lounge every wednesday. About the 3 week when they checked his blood, he had low White blood cell count and could not get chemo, but continued the radiation sessions. He is 75 years old and for the last 4 years has been grieving the passing on of our mom, his life partner. He finished all of his treatments 3 weeks ago, barely. He has been battling with side effects, mostly dehydration and chest pain from the sunburn. Last weekend he became severly dehydrated and had to take him to ER for IV fluids. Since that time he has stopped eating almost altogether and still won't drink. It is as if he's given up and no longer wishes to be alive. I get the feeling that everything he ingest and everything he does is just to please me and my brothers and sisters. I really believe that the cancer and the regimen of treatment he has got so far have made him feel like its no use to fight anymore to get better and he wants to die. I can respect that position,but it really hurts to see him just give in that way, after being so strong for so long. Sadly to say, its one day at a time and I feel like I'm just here watching him slowly fade away. My brother says "It is what it is". I believe that now and all I can do is remember the good times and try not to be emotional with him. There is a better place than this, I'm sure of it.