So scared, alone and need to RELAX....HELP
Comments
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Relaxing some would say is a state of mind. To a great part I agree, when your mind is always thinking about what is to come, it is very hard to settle down and relax. I would suggest that you find somthing to do that will force your mind to think about somthing other then your up comming treatment, read a book, do some puzzles, play a game on the computer.
Honey you have every right to be concerned about your upcomming treatment, and I do realize how hard it is to not think about it. Somthing like this is frightening, it is the unknown. You have so many questions about what will happen, how you will feel, and on and on and on. It is so important for you to find that room in your mind that is your safe place, where you can go to escape all of these worries. If you do, and you find things to help you keep your mind busy it will.
I don't know if this will help any. Know though that you are not alone at home or here,
tjhay0 -
Hi Dale
You are not alone in
Hi Dale
You are not alone in this. We all feel that isolation from people who have not experienced
cancer. It is a very exclusive club that you have unfortunately become a member of. But so have all of us on the board. And we are here to help each other through every step of the way. Chemo is the scariest part of the whole trauma for a lot of us. It certainly was for me.
To let them shoot poisons into your veins, not knowing what the effect will be on your body, is a crazy thing to have to do. But they are so good at controlling the side effects now that most of us experience very little nausea. I'll have my 4th treatment next week, and I just feel lethagic for a few days. Good luck and let us know how it goes.
Dee0 -
(((((HUGS))))))
Awwww...you are in the right place for the fellow feeling and support you need at this time. We know how frightened you are; most of us have been exactly where you are right now. As someone so eloquently posted a while back: "you are our past, we are your future."
You are literally fighting for your life~ of course you need to relax! But you can and will be able to do it~ and now you know that emotionally, you are no longer doing it alone. You have all of us surrounding you and holding your hand through every step of the way. When you feel a tug, it's just us, holding your hand, and pulling you toward us and Life After Cancer! You can even have life DURING cancer, but it's wonderful to look ahead and know that even this will be in your past sooner than you think.
Continue to read and post; you will be quite amazed at the insight and fellow-feeling you will find among us.
Hold tight!
Hugs,
Claudia0 -
When I feel panic stricken
When I feel panic stricken (it seems to happen often these days
) I sit down somewhere quiet, close my eyes and image myself as a young girl - maybe 5, 6 years old. Being very, very sad, heart broken. Walking around in the house feeling all alone and lost. Then seeing my dad sitting on his favourite chair, calling me to him. I go sit on his lap and his arms fold around me. My head against his chest, he sings me a lullaby. I can hear his deep voice through his chest.... I feel warm and I feel safe, and I feel loved.
That little girl is me still, and often God sweeps me up in his arms, and just sings me a lullaby. He doesn't promise me anything, don't give me anything, don't say empty words. He just holds me agains him and I can hear his voice in my whole body.
You are not alone, you are in God's arms.0 -
Well, hun...
you are about to be surrounded by the most supporting and loving bunch of sisters you could hope for. So the feeling alone is on it's way out.
And I would dare to say that, though it may not be realistic to expect to relax all together until you have had a treatment and found that you are totally capable of doing this, you are going to find that being here and just laying it all on the table (we don't have to pretend here) is going to help tremendously with the anxiety. But, if you need to call your doctor and say, 'hey, time for some help here', just do it. There are several meds available for stress and anxiety. One will work for you if you need to go that route.
And, don't forget, that you were moving about your day with a smile at one point while others were going through this, so the cards have just been re-shuffled. It is life after all. Concentrate on doing what has to be done to get back to the 'walking with a smile' kind of days in your life.
God bless.0 -
the wait is the worstzahalene said:Well, hun...
you are about to be surrounded by the most supporting and loving bunch of sisters you could hope for. So the feeling alone is on it's way out.
And I would dare to say that, though it may not be realistic to expect to relax all together until you have had a treatment and found that you are totally capable of doing this, you are going to find that being here and just laying it all on the table (we don't have to pretend here) is going to help tremendously with the anxiety. But, if you need to call your doctor and say, 'hey, time for some help here', just do it. There are several meds available for stress and anxiety. One will work for you if you need to go that route.
And, don't forget, that you were moving about your day with a smile at one point while others were going through this, so the cards have just been re-shuffled. It is life after all. Concentrate on doing what has to be done to get back to the 'walking with a smile' kind of days in your life.
God bless.
waiting on the day of this new experience is the worst, I have just completed chemo, radiation and will take herception until January 2010. It's not something to look forward to,but I can tell you it's very doable. Just try to "FACE IT, FIGHT IT AND FORGET IT" this is my motto that I'm living by.
J0 -
Oh Dearflorist said:the wait is the worst
waiting on the day of this new experience is the worst, I have just completed chemo, radiation and will take herception until January 2010. It's not something to look forward to,but I can tell you it's very doable. Just try to "FACE IT, FIGHT IT AND FORGET IT" this is my motto that I'm living by.
J
The wait is just terrible........You will soon be flung headlong into it with no time to think about anything apart from..." Hey, Is my arse on fire? "
Then spat out the other end wondering "Whew, Man, What the hell just happened?"
I hope the waiting goes fast, because it is the worst!
Hugs Jxxxxxxxxxxxxx0 -
You are not alonetasha_111 said:Oh Dear
The wait is just terrible........You will soon be flung headlong into it with no time to think about anything apart from..." Hey, Is my arse on fire? "
Then spat out the other end wondering "Whew, Man, What the hell just happened?"
I hope the waiting goes fast, because it is the worst!
Hugs Jxxxxxxxxxxxxx
I know exactly what you are going through and how you are feeling. I start my chemo on Tuesday. Just keep checking in with the board and they will help ease your mind. They have helped me. Good luck and you will be ok.
laura0 -
Ofcourse you are having
Ofcourse you are having trouble relaxing. Look what you are going through! I find that deep breathing really helps me to relax. Inhale deeply through your nose slowly, and then exhale slowly through your mouth. Keep breathing deeply and you will begin to relax. It works in spite of you---something about the sympathetic nervous system. Massage is also very relaxing.
Also, you might want to try relaxation CDs. They really are great and use soothing music, verbal and visual prompts to slow down your breathing, heart rate, and calm your mind. Sometimes when I can't sleep they help me and were a great help when I was going through my treatment.
Hang in there and good luck! If I think of any other ideas I will be sure to post them.0 -
There's a lot of wisdom on this Board
Sisters have posted about breathing, prayer, and refocusing your energy. Another source of help may be your hospital's or cancer center's social worker. (S)he is a resource for dealing with anxiety and can help you find the right tools to cope with and process what you are feeling. Been there, xoxoxoxo Lynn0 -
Hi Dale
I have had alot of anxiety since my diagnosis in April and surgery in May. The relaxation tapes are great, praying works, keeping busy helps...but my anxiety was pretty severe making my heart race. I called my doctor and he orderred xanax for me which really has helped.
Chemo is tough...I had treatment 3 on friday and having alot of fatigue...feel like I have morning sickness but I am on A/c which i guess is pretty tough
I want you to know that you are not alone at all here...someone is usually on and the support is so wonderful. I cant tell you just how great everyone is
Post often...we will all do this together
Hugs
Linda T0 -
We all feel like this. Imlmjt1 said:Hi Dale
I have had alot of anxiety since my diagnosis in April and surgery in May. The relaxation tapes are great, praying works, keeping busy helps...but my anxiety was pretty severe making my heart race. I called my doctor and he orderred xanax for me which really has helped.
Chemo is tough...I had treatment 3 on friday and having alot of fatigue...feel like I have morning sickness but I am on A/c which i guess is pretty tough
I want you to know that you are not alone at all here...someone is usually on and the support is so wonderful. I cant tell you just how great everyone is
Post often...we will all do this together
Hugs
Linda T
We all feel like this. I just find that I put on my big girl panties and fight it. Don't let it take you over. Praying for you!0 -
Try to find something that makes you smilesurvivorbc09 said:We all feel like this. I
We all feel like this. I just find that I put on my big girl panties and fight it. Don't let it take you over. Praying for you!
I hope no one thinks I'm being overly simplistic here, but I find it a big help to keep on hand DVDs of tv shows or movies that I know always make me smile, laugh, and/or even sing along.
For me, it's Pixar movies (smile), old Frasier episodes (laugh) and MGM musicals (sing along). But it could be anything -- old I Love Lucy episodes, the Marx brothers, a concert video of your favorite group. If you don't have DVDs, try typing the name the your favorite old tv show into YouTube -- you can find almost anything there.
Please know that I do NOT mean to suggest, "oh, just watch a movie, and suddenly everything will be sunshine and rainbows." As far as I know, not even Sid Caesar can cure my cancer -- but he makes me laugh out loud, and that helps my spirits when I need it.
Traci0 -
I agree Traci. It seemsTraciInLA said:Try to find something that makes you smile
I hope no one thinks I'm being overly simplistic here, but I find it a big help to keep on hand DVDs of tv shows or movies that I know always make me smile, laugh, and/or even sing along.
For me, it's Pixar movies (smile), old Frasier episodes (laugh) and MGM musicals (sing along). But it could be anything -- old I Love Lucy episodes, the Marx brothers, a concert video of your favorite group. If you don't have DVDs, try typing the name the your favorite old tv show into YouTube -- you can find almost anything there.
Please know that I do NOT mean to suggest, "oh, just watch a movie, and suddenly everything will be sunshine and rainbows." As far as I know, not even Sid Caesar can cure my cancer -- but he makes me laugh out loud, and that helps my spirits when I need it.
Traci
I agree Traci. It seems some just let it take them to the extreme, rather then taking control of it. Get out of the house, get off of the computer, go for a walk, go shopping, go see your grandkids, go see a friend, lay in bed with your husband and watch a movie, just do something other than panicking. And, if nothing works, please talk to your doctor about getting some help with anxiety drugs. I know there is no simple solution, but, you just don't want to let it take you over either.
You have to take control of this and try to stop it. So, please call your doctor and make an appointment to talk with him.
You don't have to go thru this anxiety on your own.
There is help.
Good luck
Kylez0 -
Sorry so late
I just had a chance to get on the computer late tonight, so I am very late in responding. I was wondering though if you are feeling better? Anxiety is a terrible feeling to have to deal with. I found that xanax works well for me when it becomes more than I can cope with. Seems to mellow me right out within 15-20 minutes. If you have nothing to take, talk to your Doctor and ask if he can presribe you something for just these moments. I really hate to make it sound like all our problems can be fixed from a pill bottle, but under these circumstances, why go through anything more than we have to? Please post and let us know how you are. (:-) Pammy0 -
I'm late tooAkiss4me said:Sorry so late
I just had a chance to get on the computer late tonight, so I am very late in responding. I was wondering though if you are feeling better? Anxiety is a terrible feeling to have to deal with. I found that xanax works well for me when it becomes more than I can cope with. Seems to mellow me right out within 15-20 minutes. If you have nothing to take, talk to your Doctor and ask if he can presribe you something for just these moments. I really hate to make it sound like all our problems can be fixed from a pill bottle, but under these circumstances, why go through anything more than we have to? Please post and let us know how you are. (:-) Pammy
I agree with what others have said. You should really talk to you doctor and I'm sure he/she will be able to prescribe something for your depression/anxiety.
As for the breathing ... have you ever taken a yoga class? I did years ago and to this day I pull from things I learned in those sessions. I learned how to really take those "cleansing" breaths ... and relax my body. I admit that I don't always practice what I preach and I am only human and I still do get anxious and depressed. But... I am on medication ... and use my deep breathing techniques.
As for the chemo treatments ... some people like people around during the chemo ... and like to be entertained and distracted. I wanted to be alone. I took my xanax before I went for my appointment, then when I got there I put on my relaxtion CD ... and the first thing they gave was benadryl ... so I'd pull the blanket up all cozy ... take my slow deep breaths ... and I actually slept through most of my treatments.
You'll do just fine ... but do talk to your doctor about prescribing something to help you relax ...
hugs.
teena0 -
ANXIOUS / SOOOO VERY ALONE.....CRYING OUT FOR HELPAkiss4me said:Sorry so late
I just had a chance to get on the computer late tonight, so I am very late in responding. I was wondering though if you are feeling better? Anxiety is a terrible feeling to have to deal with. I found that xanax works well for me when it becomes more than I can cope with. Seems to mellow me right out within 15-20 minutes. If you have nothing to take, talk to your Doctor and ask if he can presribe you something for just these moments. I really hate to make it sound like all our problems can be fixed from a pill bottle, but under these circumstances, why go through anything more than we have to? Please post and let us know how you are. (:-) Pammy
I am just so anxious today that I feel as I overdosed on caffeine (which I have none). How do you keep you mind OFF the anticipated treatment and the dx? I asked my MD for medication to help with anxiety but she does not prescribe anxiety medication because of the high potential for addiction so instead she prefers to use anti-depression medications (Celexa). I am so afraid of anti-depressants. What do I do? Why is it when I awake in the AM the first thing on my mind is my dx? How do I let that go? PLEASE ANYONE HELP IF YOU CAN!!!!0 -
I know how you feelDaledj85 said:ANXIOUS / SOOOO VERY ALONE.....CRYING OUT FOR HELP
I am just so anxious today that I feel as I overdosed on caffeine (which I have none). How do you keep you mind OFF the anticipated treatment and the dx? I asked my MD for medication to help with anxiety but she does not prescribe anxiety medication because of the high potential for addiction so instead she prefers to use anti-depression medications (Celexa). I am so afraid of anti-depressants. What do I do? Why is it when I awake in the AM the first thing on my mind is my dx? How do I let that go? PLEASE ANYONE HELP IF YOU CAN!!!!
The anxiety of everything really stinks doesnt it? I cant believe your dr wont prescribe anything for your anxiety either especially on what you are going through. Was it your family dr or your onc. Your onc might be able to help you with something or vice verse. The thing with antidepressants is one, they take awhile to get into your system and they dont really help with anxiety attacks. Know that you are not alone with all this, its always on my mind it seems every minute of the day. Coming here and sharing with the board has helped me alot. Keep coming here for the advice and encouragements. Letting it out helps to let it go and makes it seem a little better for me. I dont think you can totally let it all go, but know that some day soon it will be better and we will be looking back and sighing that sigh of relief that it is behind us. Take care and just keep coming here. Also, it sounds like an outside support group might help you. Contact your local ACS and ask them for local groups you could attend. Take care and big hug to you.
laura0 -
Daledj
I'm hoping for peace for you. I(and everyone else on here)know what it's like to be anxious and nervous.
You are going to be okay!0 -
Find a Doctor That Will Help with Cancer AnxietyDaledj85 said:ANXIOUS / SOOOO VERY ALONE.....CRYING OUT FOR HELP
I am just so anxious today that I feel as I overdosed on caffeine (which I have none). How do you keep you mind OFF the anticipated treatment and the dx? I asked my MD for medication to help with anxiety but she does not prescribe anxiety medication because of the high potential for addiction so instead she prefers to use anti-depression medications (Celexa). I am so afraid of anti-depressants. What do I do? Why is it when I awake in the AM the first thing on my mind is my dx? How do I let that go? PLEASE ANYONE HELP IF YOU CAN!!!!
I am lucky to have a friend who is a good friend with a psychiatrist at the Dana Farber Institute. Although he can't treat me (we live on opposite sides of the continent), he did give me encouraging words over the phone. He was very upset to learn how undertreated I was and gave me the strength to advocate for myself and to find doctors who could help me. It took a while, but I am on the mend. Don't be afraid to fire your doctor and find one who really knows about us. xoxoxo Lynn0
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