PLEASE forgive ME!
Mike
Comments
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We All Need to Vent
Hi Mike - Thanks for the welcoming message. I have seen a lot of posts and started to reply and then realized I might be sounding like "mine is worse than yours", or my problems are worse. We all get tired and angry and negative at times, and being scared is one of the many emotions women (AND MEN) feel with this. A man I worked with also had breast cancer, many many years ago, and he is doing great. Hang in there friend, we are all in this together and you have our support as you start your own journey. You do not need to be forgiven, we understand.
Pat0 -
{{{mike}}}
you know mike, i think we all go in cycles, which is why this place is so special. We have a day...ok, maybe more than a few days, where we just need support, shoulders, and someone else to carry us for awhile...and then the tides turn, and we are out there on the front lines doing the same for someone else.
I,personally, have not noticed your posts being negative...honesty is what i count on here. I love having a man on here that can give a different perspective.
No apologies...sheese!!! not here.... ok???
jeanne0 -
Patpadee6339 said:We All Need to Vent
Hi Mike - Thanks for the welcoming message. I have seen a lot of posts and started to reply and then realized I might be sounding like "mine is worse than yours", or my problems are worse. We all get tired and angry and negative at times, and being scared is one of the many emotions women (AND MEN) feel with this. A man I worked with also had breast cancer, many many years ago, and he is doing great. Hang in there friend, we are all in this together and you have our support as you start your own journey. You do not need to be forgiven, we understand.
Pat
I don't think anyone here would look at it as you put it that your problem is worse than anyone else. Don't be afraid to post, thats what this site is for. We all have some crazy feelings that come out from time to time. Cancer the definition should be - Angry,emotional,scared.0 -
Mike,
Nothing to be forgiven about! We all give and get from this board-that's what it's all about! Don't you worry!!0 -
Patoutdoorgirl said:Mike,
Nothing to be forgiven about! We all give and get from this board-that's what it's all about! Don't you worry!!
Thank you, I was afraid to also, because I don't even have the DX yet. I am NOT a survivor yet, I am a care-giver at this (but for PC not BC) point, but everyone has welcomed me with loving open arms. I certainly wouldn't have taken it that, even though I tend to post that very same way myself. I have been spending a lot of time "feeling sorry fo myself" mainly because of the "waiting". Thank YOU and everyone else who have been SO supportive of me and everyone else. HUGS to all!
Mike0 -
No apologiesoutdoorgirl said:Mike,
Nothing to be forgiven about! We all give and get from this board-that's what it's all about! Don't you worry!!
Hey Mike,
I've yet to read any posts of yours that have sounded anything but...well, how do I put this....just like one of us! We're all in this together. A diagnosis of cancer, or the fear of one, is what puts us here. And we all share the good and the bad and the ugly.
Whining is permitted here.
Worrying is accepted here.
The only rules here, as far as I can tell, are:
1)honesty, 2)compassion, and 3) unconditional acceptance.
So...........no apologies are necessary.
With love,
Debi0 -
You must be a giver, Mikeoutdoorgirl said:Mike,
Nothing to be forgiven about! We all give and get from this board-that's what it's all about! Don't you worry!!
Mike,
If you are worried about being negative and not supportive, you must be a giver in life. The other side of that, though, is letting other people give to you. If you had positive thoughts about bc, you would not have sought out this group. You of all people have reason to feel negative. Allow yourself your be held up instead of being the beam. I have not noticed you being negative, actually, nor have I found your posts discouraging. You suffer from bc and at this time need to be supported. Others are at a time and place where they can be supportive and encouraging now. But even then, there are times when everyone needs a shoulder to lean on. When people encourage you and try to get you to think happy thoughts, they are not making a comment on your attitude or anything. They just hurt for you being in the place you are and want to make it better even though words can't do that. I hope you continue to express yourself in that honest way.0 -
yep you areThe1percen said:Pat
Thank you, I was afraid to also, because I don't even have the DX yet. I am NOT a survivor yet, I am a care-giver at this (but for PC not BC) point, but everyone has welcomed me with loving open arms. I certainly wouldn't have taken it that, even though I tend to post that very same way myself. I have been spending a lot of time "feeling sorry fo myself" mainly because of the "waiting". Thank YOU and everyone else who have been SO supportive of me and everyone else. HUGS to all!
Mike
Once you get even a maybe, you are officially a survivor. I think the maybes are the hardest part!
When will you get the results? I hope you are NOT going to be one of the few. I know of a few men--some related to me-- that have had bc. Quite a different set of emotions along with the normal ones. I will be hoping for you, and for whomever it is you are caring for. Double whammy, man! I feel for you! Life sure can stink sometimes. (Can't appreciate it, though, until it comes time to smell the flowers.)0 -
what she said....bfbear said:No apologies
Hey Mike,
I've yet to read any posts of yours that have sounded anything but...well, how do I put this....just like one of us! We're all in this together. A diagnosis of cancer, or the fear of one, is what puts us here. And we all share the good and the bad and the ugly.
Whining is permitted here.
Worrying is accepted here.
The only rules here, as far as I can tell, are:
1)honesty, 2)compassion, and 3) unconditional acceptance.
So...........no apologies are necessary.
With love,
Debi
U got that right, girl!0 -
mikeThe1percen said:Pat
Thank you, I was afraid to also, because I don't even have the DX yet. I am NOT a survivor yet, I am a care-giver at this (but for PC not BC) point, but everyone has welcomed me with loving open arms. I certainly wouldn't have taken it that, even though I tend to post that very same way myself. I have been spending a lot of time "feeling sorry fo myself" mainly because of the "waiting". Thank YOU and everyone else who have been SO supportive of me and everyone else. HUGS to all!
Mike
i am sorry you had to find your way here as we all did . I look at cancer as just what it is . it didnt ask what sex so we would get the right cancer i sure hope every thing come back good for you. we need your input . i am still afraid and will alway be afraid that it will come back.i am thankful you feel free to talk to us thanks milk.0 -
Hey Mike, Debi hit the nail...bfbear said:No apologies
Hey Mike,
I've yet to read any posts of yours that have sounded anything but...well, how do I put this....just like one of us! We're all in this together. A diagnosis of cancer, or the fear of one, is what puts us here. And we all share the good and the bad and the ugly.
Whining is permitted here.
Worrying is accepted here.
The only rules here, as far as I can tell, are:
1)honesty, 2)compassion, and 3) unconditional acceptance.
So...........no apologies are necessary.
With love,
Debi
Debi has hit the nail on the head for you and me and ALL of us. For those of us who are survivors, we remember all too well the FEAR, the side effects, the FEAR, the tears, the depression, the FEAR, the discomfort, the FEAR! We all needed support and we all needed to vent. That's why this place exists for me. And I think for all of us.
Mike, I never read someone's post and think they are trying outdo someone else. All I read is that they are hurting and miserable and scared and if I can give a little support, hope, sunshine, silliness whatever, I try to help because so many were there to help me.
Hang in there guy. Hugs, Marilynn0 -
PLEASE!
Don't apologize for your emotions. (not that I have noticed either) You have every right to whine, complain, kick the wall, butt your head into the wall, any thing to release bottled up tension. We are here for you. And we know that you will be here for us when we are whining.
Waiting is the worst part. You certainlly have had your share of it. I'm sorry that you have had such a long wait.
Take care
Jadie<30 -
What's he on about now?Jadie said:PLEASE!
Don't apologize for your emotions. (not that I have noticed either) You have every right to whine, complain, kick the wall, butt your head into the wall, any thing to release bottled up tension. We are here for you. And we know that you will be here for us when we are whining.
Waiting is the worst part. You certainlly have had your share of it. I'm sorry that you have had such a long wait.
Take care
Jadie<3</p>
You'd think he was as bad as me!
I am absolutely the worst poster in here (Behaviour wise) ...
If they can put up with me, You have NO Problems! LOL
Hugs Jxx0 -
Worst Poster Award!tasha_111 said:What's he on about now?
You'd think he was as bad as me!
I am absolutely the worst poster in here (Behaviour wise) ...
If they can put up with me, You have NO Problems! LOL
Hugs Jxx
LOL LOL Tasha~ correct! NO ONE is as bad as you are ( or as good!) and none of us would want you any other way!!!!!
You always make me smile...and that's a good thing~ thank you!
Hugs,
Claudia0 -
Sorry? About what?????
As the rest have already said: No apologies necessary! Trust me on this one, Mike, this group of women who put the GRRRRR in Girl-Power would have told you if you had been less than supportive, rude, flippant, uncaring, or anything else we might take issue with! :-)
If you are or have been caring for someone with a cancer diagnosis, you are already a Saint in my book. I know I would not have wanted to go through this without the loving care of my sweet Reggie. And do you know what we REALLY want for you? That you have infected, swollen lymph-glands or something~ anything rather than cancer!
But, should it turn out to be The Beast~ you will have a jumpstart being on the receiving end of this awesome family of warrior-survivors!
Hugs,
Claudia0 -
You're completely fine!
I never read any of your posts as overly negative, Mike. And even if they were negative, that's OK. How else is one to feel about cancer? We have room for all types of emotions here. Good, bad, negative, positive. While I think it's great to be positive (and I certainly try to be), there can be a tyranny about being made to "think positive" at all times. We are human and are being faced with perhaps the biggest disaster of our lives. Being negative is not unexpected. Having said that, I don't think you're negative at all.
Mimi0 -
speechless!mimivac said:You're completely fine!
I never read any of your posts as overly negative, Mike. And even if they were negative, that's OK. How else is one to feel about cancer? We have room for all types of emotions here. Good, bad, negative, positive. While I think it's great to be positive (and I certainly try to be), there can be a tyranny about being made to "think positive" at all times. We are human and are being faced with perhaps the biggest disaster of our lives. Being negative is not unexpected. Having said that, I don't think you're negative at all.
Mimi
THANK YOU ALL VERY MUCH!!!
It is so wonderful to have such an amazing group of FRIENDS! I think in the future I hold off on posting for an hour or so to let my "meds" kick-in. I have to wonder at this point if cancer is worse than "mental" problems. With cancer most of the time you "know" where you stand,(you may not like it, but...)and granted it can come back, but living with Depression and Anxiety to the point of being suicidal is NO picnic. I have had many people tell me to "suck it up", In that respect it is VERY MUCH LIKE cancer... if you don't have it, most likely you don't "get it"! I have to commend several of you for "your attitude" Cat, Claudia, Tasha, you "guys" are absolutely amazing!!! I can't tell you how many times ALREADY, you have cheered me up! HUGS to all,
Mike0 -
You're okay
Mike, I have never felt that your posts were not supportive. The big thing about typing on line is enterpretation. How someone would react to what you typed. I type my response, and then re-read to make sure that I haven't offended anyone. also to make sure it makes sense. I don't know about you, but sometimes my brain goes faster then my fingers or vis versa...
Julie0
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