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lynn1950's picture
lynn1950
Posts: 2573
Joined: Jun 2008

Hi my dear sisters, For the past couple of weeks I've felt some odd little bumps above my mastectomy scar. I called my cancer center yesterday and they said to go see my GP. I saw my GP today who immediately sent me for an ultrasound. The radiologist said the chance that it is a recurrence is 50-70%. I see the surgeon tomorrow sometime between 2 and 4. Please pray, or send golden light or just share your fellowship with me. I love you all. Lynn

tasha_111's picture
tasha_111
Posts: 2043
Joined: Oct 2008

You have always been here for me.........Now I am here for you. I will keep my fingers crossed for you.....you are such a love, I'll be thinking of you and wishing you the very best

Huge Hugs to you TashXxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

lynn1950's picture
lynn1950
Posts: 2573
Joined: Jun 2008

You are the best and one of my most favorite people. As you're crossing your fingers, don't forget to give the finger to this sh*tty disease!

Aortus's picture
Aortus
Posts: 967
Joined: Jan 2009

Here we were hoping and praying that you would land that job, but we are definitely praying now that it is NOT a recurrence.

Love,
Moopy and Joe

lynn1950's picture
lynn1950
Posts: 2573
Joined: Jun 2008

Just like Tasha, you are so firmly entrenched in my heart, the two of you, as if you are my neighbors. Thank you for your prayers. The job feels like a blip now. New perspective. Hope rads are going smoothly. Ah, springtime in St. Louis. Lynn

tasha_111's picture
tasha_111
Posts: 2043
Joined: Oct 2008

Give it the Bird!.,

Sorry, I don't pray,,,,,,I don't have to: I have a direct line.

Moopster and J.......You have soooooooooo many babyguppies here I havn't got room........I'm going to sling some in the garden pond and HOPE THEY GET EATEN!

Little sods, I think Guppies are BORN BLOODY PREGNANT!.......What's the matter with them? eh?....I provide loads of distractions.......gravel, plants, fake plants shells, fake logs.......and IT is all they can think about........Yeeeeeee Gads!

Lynn.....Don't give up on anything..........We need you here! Huge Hugs Jxxxxxxxxxxxx

Moopy23's picture
Moopy23
Posts: 1753
Joined: Jan 2009

Oh, Lynn, you are so dear to us, neighbors in our hearts for sure. We have you firmly in our hearts and prayers and thoughts.

Hold tight to the peaceful and soothing images and feelings you experienced just this past week at Living Waters. And Arbojenn is right: even if it were a recurrence, you will be OK.

Your new photo is lovely. The tender and joyous moment with your daughter on her wedding day is so touching. Even in profile, I can see that you look alike and are both beautiful. You will be there to celebrate her children's weddings.

Love, Moopy

p.s. We are enjoying the springtime storms of St. Louis!

arbojenn
Posts: 118
Joined: May 2009

ARe you guys staying in St. Louis for the radiation treatments? I am suppose to go to Greenville for mine, but that is eighty five miles each way. I am thinking of just staying down there for the duration. Is that doable? Can you get reasonable rates at motels, or at least get hospital discounts? Are you able to go out and have some fun after your treatments, or do you get too tired and sick? Please let me learn from you. I would really appreciate knowing your journey so I can plan mine, too. And also because I've posts from and to you and you are one really cool lady!

Moopy23's picture
Moopy23
Posts: 1753
Joined: Jan 2009

Hi, Arbojenn, and thanks for the compliment. I sure feel cool with no hair on my head!

I can tell you there are medical rates. You do have to ask for them, though. The hospital where I will be treated also has apts that you can use either cheaply or maybe free. Do ask the radiation office/nurse or hospital guest relations as soon as you can. Also, the ACS is a good place to check. You can go to the homepage or just call the ACS number (sorry I don't have it with me).

Joe and I are breaking open my 401K for a splurge to have all of us, dogs and all here in comfort. I figure: I first have to make it to retirement age. Then I will worry about a "retirement lifestyle."

As far as how tired you are after rads, I won't have my first treatment until the end of the month (another story). But, Mimi and Jackie and Nancy (Mike's Sunshine) are all currently getting rads. Jeanne just finished not too long ago, as have Kristin and Noel. (Sorry for forgetting someone: I know I have but can't think right now. My apologies, sisters.) Any of them can tell you more about the level of fatigue. You can read older posts, or just start a new thread.

I sure hope it's not so tiring that you don't feel like getting out and about. I would hate to think I will be lying up here in the big city of St. Louis instead of having fun.

I will be glad to answer any questions and help you learn from me. I have learned so much from the wonderful women like Lynn who have been here for me and all of us. It's good to "pay it forward."

All the best, Moopy

Moopy23's picture
Moopy23
Posts: 1753
Joined: Jan 2009

Very aggravating. Sorry

arbojenn
Posts: 118
Joined: May 2009

Lynn 1950, I am so sorry! You were so right to go see the doctor as soon as you saw those bumps! (I noticed mine in my mastectomy scar about a year ago. Then a rash. GPs said it was just scar tissue. I didn't get diagnosed until May of this year when I went to a dermatologist for a "rash.") Recurrence after a mastecomy is rare and the fact that your GP recognized the possibility means heaven is looking out for you. The wait and the not knowing is agonizing and I feel for you. I wish I could carry some of your load for you. I'll bet the surgeon will do a needle biopsy and hopefully have an answer for you before the weekend. Please let me know. Hang in there. The waiting and not knowing are the hardest part, I think. Once you know you can breath a sigh of relief if it is negative, but if it is positive, you can take control and get the engine going for a cure. Recurrence is not the "death" sentence it used to be. My oncologist firmly believes I will be completel cured of my cancer after I get my whole thing done. I hope and pray that your test comes out negative. But if it doesn't, keep strong and come back to talk. There is so much hope here! And it appears you have an angel looking out for you.

cats_toy's picture
cats_toy
Posts: 1463
Joined: Feb 2009

Absolutely you will be in my prayers Lynn. Let me tell you I just went through this, could not share it on the board, dummy me, just waited it out. I turns out to be scar tissue, and they did the MRI, ultrasound and mammogram to be sure. Now they want me to do another MRI in three months just to be sure, but this is somewhat normal according to all the pro's I talked to about it. I will pray that this is the same with you, and please let us know as soon as you find out.
Cat

taleena's picture
taleena
Posts: 1612
Joined: May 2009

Lynn, I am new to this group... just by a couple of weeks... You will be in my prayers... I am sending you very positive thoughts your way.. Hang in there.. let us know what you find out.. seems to be the redundant statement... obviously I lack originality.. (smile).. Please be kind to yourself... we will be thinking of you.

~T

Jeanne D's picture
Jeanne D
Posts: 1867
Joined: Mar 2009

Sorry to read that you had a scare too, but, soooooooooooooo happy to read that it is

just scar tissue. And, you got all of the tests and are OK! So happy to hear that Cat!

Were your bumps around your lumpectomy incision, if you don't mind my asking? Such good news

about you! Take care Cat!

cats_toy's picture
cats_toy
Posts: 1463
Joined: Feb 2009

yes, the lumps were just below the incision, I did have a large tumor removed (the size of the dr fist) and it is a sizeable scar, the lump isn't under the scar, but below it if you know what I mean. It is still there and it aches, so I sit here with my hand in my shirt most nights just massaging it. Dear hubby has taken to calling me Napoleon. Thanks for the good wishes I am also sooooooo very happy to have that little issue behind me!
thanks again Jeanne
Cat

Jeanne D's picture
Jeanne D
Posts: 1867
Joined: Mar 2009

Your hubby is funny! lol I am also glad that the issue is behind you.

You must have been scared. I know I would be. Just glad that it turned out to be nothing

and that you are back home now! Take care, Jeanne

lynn1950's picture
lynn1950
Posts: 2573
Joined: Jun 2008

I don't know you so well. With my family and working I have a hard time keeping up with all the discussions. Thanks so much for your support. I have 2 little solid masses beneath my skin. One 3mm and one 1mm. I've already had chemo and radiation, so if it's cancer, I don't know what can be done.

Thanks for seeing and responding to my post. Your support means the world to me. Tell me what happened to you, Cat's Toy (I always enjoyed your graphics and sense of humor and think it stinks they took our pretties away!). Lynn

cats_toy's picture
cats_toy
Posts: 1463
Joined: Feb 2009

Lynn,
We are always here (at least some of us all of the time, or is it all of us some of the time?) and you can usually get an answer or two or three! And we all know each other better and faster than with most other relationships because we have all experienced something so devastating to our lives and come out the better for it. How long has it been since the chemo and rads? I just know it will all turn out OK, but please let us know when you have an answer.

And yes, I do so miss being able to post (and see others) fun little g.i.f.s, but it only takes one to spoil it for the rest. We just move along and keep up our spirits in other ways. You would think CSN would realize that anything at all uplifting can do so much good for anyone going through all the various treatments, procedures, etc and we need all the levity we can get. Oh well, it was fun while it lasted.
Take care!
Cat

Christmas Girl's picture
Christmas Girl
Posts: 3647
Joined: Apr 2009

Oh, dear. So sorry you have to face this worry. Of course, heartfelt hopes your way for tomorrow's appointment. Hoping it is absolutely not a recurrence, just bothersome scar tissue or something else non-threatening.

You got it... Golden light, positive vibes, good karma... All of it. Again, in spades.

Kind regards, Susan

Kristin N's picture
Kristin N
Posts: 1969
Joined: Mar 2009

Praying for you Lynn! God Bless You! ~Kristin~

Jeanne D's picture
Jeanne D
Posts: 1867
Joined: Mar 2009

I am so sorry Lynn! I can't imagine. But I will certainly pray for you! And, that picture

of your daughter and you is beautiful! Please keep us updated as we will all be waiting to

hear something. God bless you Lynn! Love, Jeanne

phoenixrising's picture
phoenixrising
Posts: 1509
Joined: Feb 2007

Lynn, I understand your worry and concern. I too would probably be beside myself only to find out it's just scar tissue. I am thinking of you and sending you my best in hopes it all turns out to be nothing. Golden light coming your way..........:)

big hug
jan

RE's picture
RE
Posts: 4606
Joined: Feb 2004

Hi Lynn, I have been busy all day and just now came in here to find your message. I truly hope and pray this is a false alarm, yes it can be! Actually the radiologist should not be quoting percentages to you that is the job of your onco so please don't let him upset you too terribly. Hang on to the hope that it is simply scar tissue that is becoming more noticeable as that too is quite possible. I will not be here to know what the results are as I will be out of town for a bit. I will check with you when I return. Many hugs and a ton of prayers, positive thought and love.

RE

Christmas Girl's picture
Christmas Girl
Posts: 3647
Joined: Apr 2009

Lynn, I didn't want to say so earlier... But, I totally agree with RE. Seems odd to me that the radiologist said what he/she did to you. Where I go - they can not say anything at all of the sort. That type of information would only be delivered by a doctor - NOT a radiologist.

Again, Lynn - hoping all will turn out to be OK.

Kind regards, Susan

Jeanne D's picture
Jeanne D
Posts: 1867
Joined: Mar 2009

I agree Susan and RE. Why do people that don't have the education or knowledge

do that? It amazes me. Anyway, Lynn, we are all here praying and thinking of you! Love,

Jeanne

rjjj's picture
rjjj
Posts: 1826
Joined: Jan 2009

and it all got wiped out, but basically all i was going to tell you is that you have meant so very much to me and i am paying with all my heart and soul that you are ok/ I have tears streaming right now.. but i know the lord will listen, please let us know.. i will be waiting, i love you Lynn, jackie

djteach's picture
djteach
Posts: 275
Joined: Apr 2009

Hi Lynn, First let me say that you and your daughter are absolutely beautiful. I love that picture.

I am so sorry that you are having to deal with this again-possibly. I want you to know that even though we don't know each other that well, I am lifting you and your family up in prayer. I am so hoping that it is something like scar tissue, or a little cyst. Try not to worry too much about this. Go out and do something fun, pamper yourself, but keep that worry bug away! Hang in there.

Love and gentle hugs,
Donna

tommaseena's picture
tommaseena
Posts: 1771
Joined: Feb 2009

Positive thoughts and prayers coming your way.

Margo

FeistyTexasGal
Posts: 11
Joined: Apr 2009

I was also told by the radiologist the very first day of my mammogram and ultrasound. Since no radiologist had spoken to me before, I knew I was in big trouble. He told me to be sure to get a second opinion and to absolutely not miss my appointment the next day with my surgeon. My surgeon looked at the results and told me that he was 100% certain I had cancer and that was before a biopsy. They know so much now and are so advanced. I don't know you, but I wish I did. I'm a newbie, but I'm sending out tie-dyed rays to you since I don't do "golden." Ha!

I'm having a really difficult time. I spent 30 hours in agony with what felt like 500 hot pokers in my gut two days after chemo. I've spent the past week vomiting, fatigued, in pain, staying in the bathroom, and having fever off and on. I went to work yesterday and felt fine. Out of the blue with no warning, I threw up in the middle of the office. While cleaning that up, liquid diarrhea poured out my skirt onto the floor. I don't need to tell you how humiliating that was. I came home and slept. I really need to keep this job, but who would want an employee who does that? I have chemo again tomorrow and I dread what is ahead if this is how I reacted to the first two treatments.

Cancer is bad enough, but humiliation sure doesn't help things at all. On top of that, my man is abandoning me after living together for six years. He says he can't handle it. I can't believe I'm going to have to go through the stress of breaking up on top of all of this. Says a lot about his character, though, don't you think? Plus, my 29-year-old son was in a horrific car accident Saturday night and won't be able to walk until October, so I lost a caretaker. I can't even go help him. His leg snapped in two and all the muscles and skin were torn from his knee to his ankle. He totalled his BMW after taking out a light pole and smashing into a tree. It is a miracle he is alive. If you saw the vehicle, you'd understand. He lost a couple of inches of bone and is facing several more surgeries.

Life is just a bowl of cherries.

Jadie's picture
Jadie
Posts: 727
Joined: Mar 2004

Good to hear from you again. So sorry to hear of all your troubles. Are you taking the meds for nausia? Lots of good ones out there.

Someone here had a thread on medical leaves just the other day. I think some kind of law was passed where your employer can't refuse you a leave for cancer.

Hope your son is doing better. Sounds like he was lucky afterall.

As for your boyfriend he is showing his true colors. He is thinking only of himself. He should be by your side all the way.

Please keep in touch and let us know how you are doing. Maby next chemo won't be so bad.

Hugs
Jadie

mimivac's picture
mimivac
Posts: 2147
Joined: Dec 2008

Oh man, I am so sorry this happened to you. What bad luck that you were in the office. But at least now the worst has happened and is over with. I found that I was better able to manage symptoms and circumstances as time went on and I knew what to expect. Hold your head up high and walk back into the office. This happens to people who are not on chemo. At least you have a good excuse. My aunt had diarrhea pour down her pant leg as she ran from the elevator of her apartment to her door. She had to come back with a towel and retrace her steps through the hallways, wiping up as she went. This also happened to a co-worker of mine a while ago. These things happen. It will be one of your war stories now.

I'm happy to hear that your son will be fine after his accident. What a relief. Best wishes for a full recovery for him.

Hang in there, Feisty. It will get better.

Marcia527's picture
Marcia527
Posts: 2731
Joined: Jul 2006

So sorry for all your problems. This too shall pass and I hope someday you will be in a better place in life looking back on this and saying, "Glad that is over."
Life is a bowl of cherries, everyone has pits to deal with from time to time.

rjjj's picture
rjjj
Posts: 1826
Joined: Jan 2009

I am so sorry about everything you have been through lately. Wish I could give you a hug...but here comes a big cyber one! Talk to your doctor, there has to be something to stop your nausea. Also I had diarrhea for a few days after my chemo and I was told to take immodium, that worked. Please don't be humiliated. Most people know that these things happen especially when you are in treatment.
I hope your son is able to recover quickly and completely and Thank God he is alive. As for that man of yours..it does say alot about his character. One day he will come to his senses (maybe) and realize what a wonderful lady he has lost. Keep your head up hun, things are bound to get better.
luv and hugs, jackie

Noel's picture
Noel
Posts: 3101
Joined: Apr 2009

I am so sorry FeistyGal! You certainly have a plate full!

As for the so called "man" in your life. If after 6 years, he can't handle problems in your relationship, then, you are way better off without him. Shows how much he really cares, doesn't it. The "bad" times are always a way to show how much someone loves you.

For your son, I will pray that he has a speedy and full recovery. Cars are just things, they can be replaced. Children can't. Thank God, he is ok!

Take care of yourself. Surround yourself with loved ones, friends, family, support groups.

mimivac's picture
mimivac
Posts: 2147
Joined: Dec 2008

I am thinking good thoughts for you that this is benign and just scar tissue. Lumps after a mastectomy or lumpectomy are not rare and are often no cause for concern. I'm sorry the radiologist alarmed you that way. I don't think that was right. But Lynn, even if this turns out to be something there is still plenty they can do. They may not be able to radiate, but there are options with chemo. A local recurrence is curable. There are plenty of women I know who have been through this more than once and are doing just fine.

All my love for you today.

Mimi

sunnygirl's picture
sunnygirl
Posts: 57
Joined: Feb 2009

Lynn,

I've wondered where you've been. What a beautiful photo of you and your daughter!!

Know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. Once again, YOU are on top of this. You set such an amazing example for all of us. Hugs, Cheryl

outdoorgirl's picture
outdoorgirl
Posts: 1569
Joined: Apr 2009

Here's hoping that it's benign or scar tissue! I am sorry that this has happened.

chenheart's picture
chenheart
Posts: 5182
Joined: Apr 2003

Lynn~ I am sending you healing thoughts, courage, and surrounding you with the incredible spirit of this room...you are truly enveloped by love and well-wishes.

Hugs,
Claudia

Derbygirl's picture
Derbygirl
Posts: 198
Joined: Jul 2008

Hoping for good news today. I had a lumpectomy last year and there are small lumps they called scar tissue above the excision area. Oncologist checks that area every three months. Looking forward to your update.

Jadie's picture
Jadie
Posts: 727
Joined: Mar 2004

My thoughts are with you. Waiting is the worst. Let us know as soon as possible,yes we are worrying along with you.

Jadie

dbs1673
Posts: 205
Joined: Sep 2008

I feel anxious for you Lynn and pray that your news comes soon. I often think that it is the waiting that kills us. It's times like this that I am reminded of a sign that says "Breathing is our only obligation". For now, do no more and take care of you.

dawn

Christmas Girl's picture
Christmas Girl
Posts: 3647
Joined: Apr 2009

Once again, just letting you know you're in my thoughts today... Hoping for the best possible outcome from your appointment this afternoon.

Kind regards, Susan

dbs1673
Posts: 205
Joined: Sep 2008

Nothing like having the world turned upside down onto one plate. Sounds like your body has also been trying to tell you enough is enough. Are you able to take a few days away from work and give yourself some grounding time? Sometimes I like having a moonsoon rather than weeks on end of drizzle. Perhaps this is your moonsoon that will let you get the boat out and get to drier land. We're here to give you an oar or a life jacket.

dawn

1surfermom's picture
1surfermom
Posts: 263
Joined: Mar 2009

I'm sending you my love, prayers and positive thoughts for your appointment today. Surf

Cindy54's picture
Cindy54
Posts: 454
Joined: Aug 2006

Lynn..I am sorry to hear of your latest worry. I will send all the best I can muster in your direction for a good outcome.Her's hoping it is just scar tissue and nothing more.

TexasGirl....i wish I could reach out and give you a hug. It is hard enough to battle let alone be humiliated. My Mom had the unexpected diahrrea while trying to get to the bathroom. It just happened out of nowhere and I can still see her tears of rustration. That is like the icing on the cake so to speak for humiliation. And it doesn't help to comfort you that so many others have gone through it...when it happens to you it still is humiliating. Can you take off the day you have chemo on or the following day? Maybe this would help get rid of some of the stress and let you handle the after effects of chemo in private. I hope your son continues to heal. I wish you the best. Cindy

Marcia527's picture
Marcia527
Posts: 2731
Joined: Jul 2006

I got here late again. Hope the lumps are nothing. Hugs.

tcteach's picture
tcteach
Posts: 27
Joined: Jun 2009

sends prayers and good vibes your way....

Tricia :)

jgridley
Posts: 169
Joined: May 2009

good luck and may god be with you....

Julie

ladybug22's picture
ladybug22
Posts: 647
Joined: Sep 2008

i am with you all the way hang in there god be with you. love to mty sister in pink

CR1954's picture
CR1954
Posts: 1392
Joined: Jul 2008

I'm so sorry to hear this. I have been so wrapped up in my own issues that I didn't see your post before this. So I will say now....

Of course I will keep you in my thoughts and in my prayers, and there you will stay.

IF indeed this turns out to be a recurrence, you will gather your strength and face it and fight it head on. And we will be here to help you. We will always be here for you.

With love and giant hugs for you.....

CR

lynn1950's picture
lynn1950
Posts: 2573
Joined: Jun 2008

Some of you are new to me, some of you feel like old friends who I have known forever - all of you have helped lift my spirits. The biopsy was an interesting experience. I am so numb from the mastectomy that there was very little pain. The surgeon showed me the two tiny pink nodules; they look so innocent - like something you would put on the end of a hook to catch a nice juicy trout. To think they may kill me is just such proof that we live in a mysterious, wonderful and awful world. I expect to get my biopsy report Tuesday or Wednesday.

Thank you for all your prayers and rays and good wishes. I pray and wish the same for all of you. Oh, Feisty, we've just met and I am so sorry for the news in your post. I hope you have plenty of friends to love you. I had diarrhea when I had chemo and the immodium did the trick. I do think there is some leave law, as someone mentioned, as well. Talk to your onc about anti-nausea drugs. Different drugs work for different people. I always needed a couple of days about 2 days after chemo to just vegetate. So my chemo was on Wednesday. That way I didn't miss work. Fun weekends, though. I listened to special soothing CDs when the chemo gods were sending me their worst.

Love to all of you. You really are very dear to me. Lynn (and school is out tomorrow!)

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