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Can't sleep...



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bfbear's picture
				
bfbear

				          
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        			    April 1, 2009 - 10:55pm			  			

			
			
Hi everyone.

Just feeling too awake this night before my first appointment with the BC surgeon.

I got my MRI results from the radiologist yesterday, which showed much more of an area affected (up to 5 cm, most of one quadrant of the L breast), and some questionable stuff on the R side that, and I quote "...if you want to keep that breast..." they'll have to do more tests.

So it sounds as though I'll be going through significantly more surgery than I had originally thought.  As for treatment options, at this point I haven't a clue and I guess I'll find some of that out tomorrow.

I am guessing from stuff that I've read that they don't really stage your cancer until after they remove the tumor, is that correct??

So I guess I'm just feeling lost in the unknowns, still.

It's weird...I feel as though my rational brain is disconnected from my body, because although I know in the end that I will be fine, my body is shaky and scared. Have you guys experienced this? (Probably a really dumb question...)

Thanks for listening.

Debi


‹ mammo site Never felt so alone... ›

						
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Jadie's picture
						
Jadie

				      
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April 2, 2009 - 8:16am

			
Hi bfbear  no they don't
			
Hi bfbear  no they don't stage your cancer until they remove the tumor to see how big it is and if there is node involvement.


No such thing as a dumb question.  I felt the same way like my brain was disconnected from my body and reality.  I was numb of all emotions.  Of course you are shaky and scared.  You are facing the unknown to you.  Cancer is a new language that you have to learn.   It is best if you have someone go with you to your appointment. There is so much to have to consider and many decisions to be made. A second pair of ears is good to have.  Write down questions you want answered and write the answers down (or have friend to).  


Remember to surround yourself with positive people, family and friends.

This is a very emotional time for you.  If you need help don't be afraid to ask your doctor for something for anxiety.  I took zoloft and xanax all through treatment.  He can also give you something to help you sleep.  You need your rest. I am sure he can recommend something that is not addictive. 


Sending a big cyber hug your way (((((((((bfbear)))))))))

Jadie



			
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Lelana

				      
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April 2, 2009 - 8:35am

			
Questions and fear!
			
Hello bfbear!

This is Loni's husband.

There is no question that is dumb when it comes to cancer!

I've been on the computer for over a year getting all the information I can find to help my wife get through this. This site is the best place to calm your worries i found in the last year, and only found it in the last few months.

Keep us informed as things go along and your diagnoses, the stage. We can help you through the fear and let you know what's what before it happens. Even with what little you know now, I can tell you that the doctors can do wonders for you. It is a fight though so be ready for it! Tom, Loni's loving husband! and the 12 cats!



			
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rjjj

				      
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April 2, 2009 - 8:44am

			
Hi Debi
			
This part is so hard waiting and wondering. Ask your Dr. all of the questions going through your mind. It is best to write them down..I seem to forget everything i was going to ask if i don't write it down. I think it is normal to be shaky and scared. I am glad you came to us with your concerns..this board has a calming effect on me. Also ask for a prescription for anxiety. I have zanax and ativan and only use it when i am feeling like you have described.


Anyway i am wishing you all the best tomorrow. Let us know what your Dr. says.


God Bless,

Jackie



			
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mimivac

				      
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April 2, 2009 - 9:26am

			
Couldn't sleep either
			
Hi Debi, I didn't sleep for a few days right after my diagnosis either. It's very scary not knowing and not having a treatment plan set. But the waiting will soon be over and you will be on your way to recovery. Your brain is probably protecting you right now by numbing iteself to fear and despair, but once you know what going on, things will settle down. Your brain will reconnect. Please let us know how your appointment went.


Mimi



			
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rjjj

				      
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April 2, 2009 - 9:39am

			
insightful comment
			
Hi Mimi, I never quite thought about it that way but it makes sense to me. I think our minds have a way of coping and protecting us from what we cannot deal with at the moment. That is also when i hear very bad news it seems i am disconnected to my body. It takes a while to accept this cruel blow. The good news like you said Mimi, our mind and body will reconnect...and we will feel more like ourselves everyday if we take it all in baby steps.

God Bless

jackie



			
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mimivac's picture
						
mimivac

				      
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April 2, 2009 - 9:56am

			
Yes
			
Jackie, I find that I cannot process really bad news right away. Like I've said before, the first few weeks after diagnosis, I wasn't really connecting to what was going on. I was cheerfully going to every medical appointment without really thinking about it. I think that was what kept me from having a break-down and missing appointments. My brain helped me to get important things done. The emotional stuff came later...



			
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Marcia527's picture
						
Marcia527

				      
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April 2, 2009 - 11:10am

			
My surgeon staged me before
			
My surgeon staged me before surgery. Maybe because my tumors were so large. 6cm and 3cm and another one. I had three. I was a stage 3a. I had 4 cycles of chemo before surgery. Then after surgery he restaged me at stage 2 because the chemo had done it's job. Then I had 4 more cycles of chemo and then radiation.



			
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